Odds and Ends: Retief Goosen calls Tiger a faker

The entire nation was practically pulling for Tiger Woods last weekend when he was playing in agony with a bum wheel last weekend at the U.S. Open. Well, almost the entire nation. Turns out that Retief Goosen thinks the Oscar for worst acting should have gone to Tiger.

“It just seemed when he hit bad shots his knee was in pain and on his good shots he wasn’t.”

Asked if he felt Woods could have been faking it, Goosen said: “I think so.”

“You see when he made the putts and he went down on his knees and shouting `yeah’, his knee wasn’t sore. Nobody knows if he was just showing off or if he was really injured, and I believe if he was injured he would not have played. But it was a great win.”

I like Goosen’s I think the sonofabitch faked the whole thing but it was a great win approach. Slam a guy and then clean it up with a throwaway compliment. When pressed about his comments Retief said he was just kidding.. Sort of.

“I was being light-hearted.”

“No one but Tiger knows how badly hurt he was. But if he was really badly hurt, he would have withdrawn wouldn’t he?”

In other news…

[]: You got your ring, now scram!

[Answer this…]: NASCAR officials are racists and sexists…no way!

[The Sports Muffin]: List of the top 10 MMA fighters. Sorry, Jesse Taylor didn’t make the cut

[]: Who Won’t Win The Heisman

[]: Move over competitive eaters, you have some serious competition in the dork department

[]: Moustache mania

[eBay]: Moustache mania part deux

[]: New York’s newest power couple

[]: 10 Wheaties boxes you will never see

[The Legend of Cecilio Guante]: Somehow, Man-Ram didn’t make the MLB’s All-Crazy Team

And finally, we bring you the story of a defective thong.

A Los Angeles woman claims she was injured by her Victoria’s Secret thong, prompting her to sue the underwear manufacturer.

The plaintiff in the case, Macrida Patterson, 52, attributed the May 2007 injury to a Victoria’s Secret “low-rise v-string,” according to a court document posted on The Smoking Gun.

Patterson’s lawyer told The Smoking Gun that a “design problem” caused a decorative metallic piece on the underwear to fly up and hit Patterson in the eye while she was putting the underwear on.

Patterson’s product liability lawsuit was filed in Los Angeles Superior Court last week.

The Smoking Gun reported that, prior to the lawsuit, officials from Victoria’s Secret had asked to see the offending underwear but were refused by Patterson’s lawyer.

General Sports

Sports newest odd couple: Johnny White Guy and Jr.

Who would have ever guessed that Chris Cooley and Dale Earnhardt Jr. would be like two peas in a pod? Certainly not us, but, of course, we’d be dead wrong. Turns out the fellas have been buddy-buddy for over a year now and the bond runs so deep that Cooley actually named his dog Dale Earnhardt Jr. Now, if that’s not respect and admiration then nothing is.


[Mr. Irrelevant]: Cooley and Dale Junior Are Seriously BFF

General Sports

Most obnoxious sports traditions

Why do we love sports? Oh, let us count the ways. The list starts with the simple addiction to competition and ends with all the sexy girlfriends and wives of the athletes. There’s a whole lot in between, but we forgot what it was because we started thinking about how lucky Reggie Bush is. Anyways, for as much as we love the world of sports, there are plenty of things out there that just really annoy the hell out of us and, apparently, there’s a lot that annoys the guys over at The Love of Sports as well. Here’s their list of the Most Obnoxious Sports Traditions.

8. John Sterling: “Yankees Win!”

7. Detroit Red Wings’ Octopi

6. “CHARGE!”

5. Tomahawk Chop

4. Sleeveless Shirts in NASCAR

3. Gooooaaaaaallllll!

2. Hats & Mint Juleps at the Kentucky Derby

1. The Wave

Wait a minute, let’s not forget about John Mason’s “Deeeeetroit basketball! or the creepy little kids who copy him.


[The Love of Sports]: Most Obnoxious Sports Traditions

General Sports

Say hello to NASCAR’s biggest diva

As far at the question of “Do you NASCAR?” goes, the answer is not really, but if you’re talking about the blog then we say “Hell yeah!” Anytime something breaks in the world of redneck racing NASCAR, we go straight to to get the scoop. Today we got the rundown of the sports sexiest divas and while we always knew NASCAR was loaded with honeys (we have seen Talladega Nights after all), we didn’t realize just how high caliber the tail actually was until now. At least Kyle Busch won’t be single for long.

10. Nicole Biffle (wife of Greg Biffle)
9. Katie Kenseth (wife of Matt Kenseth)
8. Lynne Allmendinger (wife of AJ Allmendinger)
7. Buffy Waltrip (wife of Michael Waltrip)
6. Crystal Hornish (wife of Sam Hornish Jr.)
5. Krissie Newman (wife of Ryan Newman)
4. Eva Busch (wife of Kurt Busch)
3. Ashley Judd (wife of Dario Franchitti)
2. Ingrid Vondebosch (wife of Jeff Gordon)
1. Chandra Johnson (wife of Jimmie Johnson)

And let’s not forgot about racing’s original diva: Trixie (girlfriend of Speed Racer)


[Do You NASCAR?]: NASCAR’s Sexiest Divas

NFL General

Odds and Ends: Bill Maher is not a Michael Vick fan

You might not agree with Bill Maher all the time. Heck, you might not ever agree with him, but we certainly have his back on this one. Rolling Stone recruited Maher to put together a list of 2007 Dickheads of the Year and his No. 1 selection was the dog burier Michael Vick.

Stop saying what he did is a cultural thing, just one of those things black folks are known for, like jazz. He’s not one of the Scottsboro boys, he electrocuted dogs.

In other news…

[]: Bicycling’s biggest road hazard

[]: Top 10 Tailgating Schools in the Nation

[The Big Lead]: Who wants to sex Big Brown?

[Lion in Oil]: Tanks from the Twins

[Busted Coverage]: NASCAR beatdown

[Sportsby Brooks]: Sweet Lou shows up in the strangest places

And finally, this is why the best seat to any live wrestling event is on your own couch.

General Sports

Kyle Busch ends a romantic relationship on-air

Winning an award can be a nerve-racking moment for anyone. Hell, in our pee-wee football league we about pissed our pants when we had to get up and accept the awards for “Best Benchwarmers” at Chuckie Cheese. So, we gotta admit that we feel for Kyle Busch as he takes to the stage in front of a sold out house and a worldwide television audience. But, dude, you should have wet your trousers before doing this.

Kyle Busch’s speech

Erica. Eva. Eric. Whatever your name is, pack you stuff and hit the road immediately because this guy is a total douche. Actually, hold off on that. Marry him first and then take half because this guy is a total douche.

General Sports

`In yo’ face Rainbow Warrior!’

On Sunday, Jimmie Johnson became the first driver to win consecutive Nextel Cup championships since Jeff Gordon did it in 1997 and again in 1998. It was a thrilling day at the race track as Johnson came into Homestead-Miami Speedway needing an 18th place finish or better in order to become the champ. He came in seventh and we’ve got all the exciting action to prove it.

Okay, so Jeff Gordon won the race and it was at Talladega, but other than that, the snail video was just as enthralling as the real thing.


[]: Johnson Wins Back-To-Back Nextel Cup Crowns

General Sports

Kyle Petty gets visor-flippin’ mad at Denny Hamlin

We’ve been known to give an unfriendly gesture or two to our fellow motorists after being cut off or tailgated. So, we can only imagine how prickly we’d be if you ratcheted up the MPH to around 200. In fact, we’d probably act a lot like Kyle Petty did after Denny Hamlin smacked him from behind during Sunday’s race at Dover International Speedway.

While the two were always being restrained and we never got to see any real brawling, we did get a verbal back-n-forth between the two. Petty thinks Hamlin is too aggressive and Hamlin thinks Petty is a meanie. You know, the usual stuff.

It’s a shame that a guy with that much talent has to drive like that,” Petty said. “We’ve seen it a lot. We’ve seen it all year long. Even his teammate, Tony Stewart, talked about it. I think it pretty much speaks for itself.

And your counter Mr. Hamlin?

Don’t smack me on the helmet,” Hamlin said. “You smack me on the helmet and I’m going to punch you in the face, bottom line. So I’d like for him to call me some time this week.

“You don’t come to my car. You don’t come to my pit. You meet me somewhere else and we’ll settle it. I have the utmost respect for Kyle, but don’t lay your hands on my head.”

Petty also accused Hamlin of lacking focus after winning the Busch Series race on Saturday. Hamlin shot down that accusation, saying he has too much to worry about in his pursuit of a Nextel Cup title.

“The biggest thing is that I know Kyle gets run over a lot and a lot of the reason is that he’s so far off the pace,” Hamlin said. “We’re in a clutter of leaders and he’s racing his own little battle and some days it’s your day and some days it’s not. Get out of the way.

Yeah, Kyle; “it’s the fastest who get paid and it’s the fastest who get laid.” Shake and bake!


[]: It’s On! Angry Petty lays the smack down in garage on Hamlin

General Sports

We never realized just how much strategy goes into NASCAR

We’ve tried our hardest to get into the world of motor sports, but we just can’t get excited about watching cars go round and round for hours on end. That was until we saw this segment about NASCAR that was both enlightening and educational. Since then, we can’t get enough of the stuff. Coach Dan Amon, we thank you for your insight.

NASCAR Coach Reveals Winning Strategy: ‘Drive Fast’

Keep turning left. Straight, straight! Go straight and go fast. Go fast and straight. Keep going fast. Straighter!”


[The Big Lead]: NASCAR Strategies, Courtesy of the Onion

General Sports

Greg Biffle hates dog killers, this means you Michael

Michael Vick is scheduled to appear in court on Thursday afternoon where he will enter a plea on the dogfighting charges against him. While most people are in total agreement that Vick is a lowlife and he should never play in the NFL again, the majority of athletes are keeping their mouths shut about the whole case. Well, except for Clinton Portis and we all know how swimmingly that went.

But the waiting for a sports figure to stand up and speak their mind is no more because NASCAR driver Greg Biffle has stepped up to the plate. Biffle is an animal rights advocate and he had no problem with forgetting the whole notion of “innocent until proven guilty in a court of law.” And we don’t blame him.

I just wish they’d put him in jail and be done with it.”

“Just put him in prison and tell the general public, just give them all the details of what they do with those dogs,” Biffle said. “How they steal people’s dogs out of their front yards and use them for bait dogs and let other dogs kill them. There’s all the horrifying stories. You look at all the pictures on the Internet of the dogs, just maimed, mangled. It’s horrible.

While Biffle wants the judge to throw the book at Vick for his dog murdering ways, he also admitted that the Falcons QB is not the only one involved with the illegal blood sport.

It goes on everywhere. He’s not the only guy. It goes on in this state too,” Biffle said. “Maybe they’ll use him as an example and maybe get some other people to think about whether they want to be in federal prison with him or not.

However, we would like to add that if they really want to make an example out of Vick, somewhere during sentencing there must be mention of a ferret and Vick’s groin.


[]: Biffle says of Vick: `I just with they’d put him in jail.’