Categories
General Sports

ESPN finally makes up for the whole `Who’s Now’ debacle

We make fun ESPN quite a bit around here. After all, we play this episode of SportsCenter virtually nonstop on our DVR. But, we gotta give credit where credit is due. This piece about the son and grandson of cult leader Jim Jones is some pretty amazing stuff.

So, hats off to Jon Fish and Chris Connelly. Keep up the good work, fellas. We are so relieved to see there’s more to ESPN than Stump the Schwab and the Budweiser Hot Seat.

Links:

[ESPN.com]: Grandson of Jonestown founder is making a name for himself

Categories
Houston Texans

Passing on Vince Young is no longer the most embarrassing moment in Texans history


It was a sick scene on the field of Reliant Stadium when Dolphins’ quarterback Trent Green collapsed to the field after being kneed in the head by Texans’ defensive tackle Travis Johnson. Watching Green lay motionless for a second consecutive year after a brutal hit was scary, but the nausea was due to Johnson’s behavior following the contact.

Johnson stood over Green’s immobile body and taunted him because he felt that Green had taken a cheap shot for his knees. Truth is, it looks like he did. So, if Green had bounced up, we wouldn’t have seen any problem with Johnson going over and slapping him upside his head. That penalty would have been understandable. Instead, the Texans were hit with a 15-yard flag for classless and disgusting behavior.

Luckily, despite suffering a concussion, Green appears to be okay and he flew home with the team after being checked out at the hospital. Not that any of that seemed to matter to an irate Johnson after the game.

The bottom line is, it was a malicious hit. It was uncalled for,” Johnson said. “He’s like the scarecrow. He wants to get courage while I wasn’t looking, and hit me in my knee instead of trying to hit me in my head. God don’t like ugly, you know what I mean?

“My knee ain’t never hurt like it hurt today,” Johnson said. “If you want to hit me, hit me in my head, hit me in my chest, don’t hit me in my knee. I’m trying to eat just like everybody else. So, to hit me like that, that showed me what type of man he was.

What makes Johnson’s behavior even more revolting is that his own teammate, fellow defensive tackle Cedric Killings broke a vertebra in his neck just two weeks ago. He left the field on a stretcher, just like Green. The Texans should be utterly embarrassed that Johnson is a member of their organization after these outbursts.

Links:

[NYTimes.com]: Green Sustains Concussion as Dolphins Remain Winless

Categories
Chicago Cubs

Maybe there’s something to this Billy Goat curse after all


Chicago Cubs fans don’t mess around when it comes time for postseason ball. In fact, they get down right nasty. Literally.

Gary Yamashiroya, commander of the Chicago Police district that includes Wrigley, told the Chicago Sun-Times in a story posted Saturday on its Web site that officers were called out to the ballpark at 5:35 a.m. Wednesday to check out reports of something hanging from the bronze statue.

What exactly was hanging from hallowed Harry Caray bronze statue you ask? A slaughtered, skinned goat carcass of course. Don’t believe us? Here’s the video evidence: Video #1, Video #2 and Video #3.

Now, we all know what happened to the Cubs over the weekend. So, we’re guessing these demonic fans are going to be looking to up the ante on the next go-round. Watch your back, Bartman!

Links:

[KSDK.com]: Holy Cow! There Was A Goat Carcass Hanging From Caray Statue
[SunTimes.com]: Dead goat hung from Harry statue

Categories
College Football

Announcers go gaga as Stanford shocks the world

Unless you have an unhealthy obsession with your TV Guide, then you probably didn’t even know a channel named VS. existed. But it does and they hit the friggin’ jackpot by broadcasting the biggest upset of the year when Stanford knocked off USC late Saturday night. Considering they’re pretty new at this whole college football scene and it was a 40-point underdog scoring a last second touchdown on fourth down to win the game, we’re going to overlook the fact that the announcers totally botched the call.

Ron Thulin: “TOUCHDOWN USC!!!…Stanford, touchdown Stanford! My Goodness.”

Kelly Stouffer: “Jim Harbaugh, if you’re asking, is going to go for the tie right here, he’s holding up…Obviously, they are tied right now. He’s going to go for the extra point.”

Ron Thulin: “You got to.

Talk about a killer duo! One guy doesn’t know which team is which and the other guy doesn’t know what the score is. No offense, we know you both have decent resumes, but you fellas got a lot of work to do before you’ll be on the big boy channels.

Perhaps you could learn a little something by watching this seamless transition from Britney Spears’ life to a game winning touchdown. Take notes, this is how the pros do it.

Categories
Pittsburgh Steelers

Najeh Davenport conducts exclusive interview with 911 dispatcher


Najeh Trenadious Monté Davenport was at it again, but don’t worry, you’re laundry is safe.

Davenport and his baby momma apparently got into a dispute on Thursday night in Cleveland after he went to pick up his 5-year-old son from the woman and simultaneously let her know that he’d be filling for full custody of the child. That didn’t go over to well with the mother, Anita Person, and despite the fact that it appears Davenport had all the necessary visitation paperwork, she grabbed the boy from the car and bolted. But she didn’t make it far.

A woman who asked not to be identified told emergency dispatchers about “a situation” in which a woman and “her baby’s father” were arguing. “He was just punching all on her and she was screaming, ‘help.'”

The anonymous caller went on to say that the man “keeps circling around the block.”

Davenport, however, denied the claims that he hit Person — telling a Cleveland television station that he never touched the woman.

No charges were filed against Davenport in the case, but we’re always going to have our suspicions about a guy who takes a dump in some chick’s laundry hamper.

But the best part of this whole crazy situation is that the Cleveland police released the 911 tapes from Davenport, Peterson and another witness.

Damn, if Najeh had really needed help, he would have been dead by the time the operator found the address! Despite the dispatcher’s horrible performance, this still conjures up warm and fuzzy memories of our childhood and evenings watching Rescue 911.

Links:

[KDKA.com]: Police Release 911 Tapes Of Davenport Dispute

Categories
All Other Sports

Hey, Rick Reilly, don’t quit your day job

We don’t know about ya’ll, but we love reading Rick Reilly’s stuff. You heard us, right? We said reading his stuff. We’re just really not feeling his new animated stand up act.

Ugh, that was painful. Reilly should ask these guys for a little help with his routine. However, we gotta admit, we did love his rip on Rex Grossman. Rex is so bad that Roger Goodell should ban him from the league for not using performance enhancing substances.

Categories
College Football

Texas Longhorns fans toast to `Oklahoma Sucks Beer’


If an Oklahoma fan literally ripping the balls off a Longhorns fan doesn’t make this one of the most heated rivalries in all of sports, then a gimmicky beer will do the trick.

For two months a year, Independence Brewing Co. in Austin churns out a different kind of beer. A burnt orange brewski, also know as “Oklahoma Sucks Beer.”

The idea for this beer came about last year, when the husband-and-wife owners of the brewery found out an Oklahoma brewer was making a Texas Sucks Beer.

They say it’s all in good fun, but it’s a good profit, too. This year they’ve sold five times the amount they did last year.

At Bubba’s Country Store in South Austin, manager Vic Patton has put out his second shipment in as many days.

“Oh, I give it about a half-hour, and it’ll be gone!” Patton said. “This is the beer they want to drink before the Texas-O.U. game, this kind of tops it off!

And just think, when you get so drunk that you pee your pants in the Cotton Bowl stands on Saturday afternoon, instead of just being considered a lightweight, you’re burnt orange urine will be the ultimate show of team spirit.

Links:

[KXAN.com]: Longhorn Fans Brew Their Pride Into Burnt-Orange Beer

Categories
High School Sports

Florida high school football teams get blasted with suspensions following bench-clearing brawl

The hammer came down today following a huge brawl during a high school football game between the players of Florida’s Miramar and Flanagan. In all, 56 players got suspended for anywhere from one to six weeks for their roles in the fight.

It’s considered by many to be the biggest mass suspension in Florida high school history with 29 suspensions going to Miramar and 27 more going to Flanagan. It all went down on September 28 during the third quarter of the game.

A cameraman for the Sun-Sentinel High School Sports program was rolling after a scuffle broke out following a play. Pushing quickly turned into thrown punches and grappling, as players from both benches rushed in to help their teammates.

“I saw one of the football players push somebody in the dirt, push their head down in the dirt. And then I saw the whole team just come out and fighting,” said one student.

Another student agrees with the suspensions, “I believe it was deserved because fighting is not tolerable amongst all schools, so I think they should have got it.

The entire offensive squad that was on the field for Miramar and the entire defensive squad for Flanagan got suspended, in addition to a bunch of other kids that came off the benches to join.

While something like this could happen anywhere in the country, it figures that it would happen in Florida. Obviously, these kidos should be receiving their scholarship letters from Miami and Florida International at any minute now.

Links:

[Sun-Sentinel.com]: Mass suspensions in Broward throw high school football programs for a loop
[CBS4.com]: Dozens Suspended After Broward Foot-Brawl

Categories
MLB General

The Full Count: NL West Rules


1. Rocky Road: The Colorado Rockies, with their second straight win in Philadelphia, have virtually locked up a series victory over the Phils. After winning with pitching in Game 1, the offense took over in Game 2. Matt Holliday homered for the second straight game, and Kaz Matsui hit a key grand slam that helped Colorado to a 10-5 victory. The Rockies have been so good the first two games that they have established themselves as the team to beat in the National League. If they close out the series against the Phillies (which they will do as the series goes to Colorado on Saturday), then the Rockies will have by far the best offense left in the NL playoffs. Their pitching staff isn’t bad either, particularly the bullpen. The Rockies’ relievers had six innings pitched in Game 2 and only one earned run. For the Phillies, sluggers Jimmy Rollins and Ryan Howard each bounced back from an unproductive Game 1 with homeruns. However, their awful pitching sent the Phillies into a hole they won’t be able to overcome.

2. Amazing Arizona: The Rockies-Diamondbacks is now the probable NLCS matchup, as Arizona also gained a 2-0 series advantage with another win over the still-cursed Cubs. Chicago starter Ted Lilly got lit up for six runs, starting with a three-run shot by Chris Young. Arizona’s Doug Davis got his first career playoff win, with four runs allowed but eight strikeouts. The Diamondbacks, though far from a formidable team, have proved that they are the class of the National League this year, with its best regular-season record and the almost-clinched NLCS berth. However, they will have to top the red-hot Rockies, which may be more than anyone can handle right now.

3. Pitching Kills: Of all the teams in the MLB playoffs, it seems the Cleveland Indians went it the quietest. However, with a 12-3 statement win over the Yankees in Game 1, they proved they are a team to be feared. This game came down mainly to pitching. Cleveland starter CC Sabathia, though he walked six, allowed only three runs and was credited with the win. Then the bullpen was near-perfect in his relief. The Yankees’ pitchers looked as bad as they were in April. Chien-Ming Wang allowed eight runs, and the bullpen wasn’t any better as the Indians’ lineup dominated. Kenny Lofton went 3-4 with two RBIs, and Travis Hafner and Victor Martinez both homered for the Tribe. This series is far from over, but the Yankees need a Game 2 victory. That will be hard to get, as they face Fausto Carmona, who was just as good (if not better) than Sabathia this year. With those two at the top of the rotation, the Indians have a weapon not a lot of teams can come close to matching.

Categories
Detroit Lions

WDFN-AM in Detroit is really starting to worry us



We don’t know what’s worse: the
interviewer’s questions or Ernie
Sims’ answers.

Not too long ago we brought you some of the highlights, or lowlights depending on how you look at it, from an interview with Detroit Lions wide receiver Roy Williams. Well, Detroit linebacker Ernie Sims went on the same radio station earlier in the week and, of course, the interview quickly deteriorated from the Xs and Os of football to crotches. Yup, crotches.

On the rip in Tatum Bell’s pants during the Bears game: (Laughs) I think they mentioned it on the sidelines, but we were so tied up to the game somebody mentioned it, we were so tied up to the game listening to the coaches and trying to get all of our adjustments on the sidelines, that, when I watch the big screen I really couldn’t point it out. I knew that he had it though.

When you’re watching film, will this come up: We might joke around about it, but it’s not a big deal. He was just out there playing ball and it just so happened that one of the guys tried to rip his pants off.

On why football players don’t wear jock straps: When we were little kids like in pee wee football they used to make us wear jock straps. As we got older in high school, some kids wore them – I didn’t wear them in high school. In college pretty much nobody wore them. It’s just the type of thing that, I’ve got hit in the jewels before but it’s just that it doesn’t happen that much, so you don’t need to wear it.

Are you worried about an injury in “that” area: Nine times out of 10, you’ll end up messing up something else. Seriously, you rarely ever hurt that area. It’s the type of thing where if you play hard, if you play wall to wall and ball to ball you don’t have to worry about it.

“Ball to ball”??? We sure hope that isn’t some new team-building exercise Rod Marinelli’s got going.

Links:

[Freep.com]: Lions linebacker Ernie Sims on making plays, kicking to Devin Hester, jock straps