Miami Dolphins

Ricky Williams is somehow nuttier without his marijuana

As if the world doesn’t already have enough quack doctors out there rendering their “services” to the public, now we’ve got to start preparing for Ricky Williams M.D. That’s right, the NFL’s oddest oddball declared in a recent interview that he wants to attend medical school after his playing days are over. Are we sure this dude isn’t still getting blazed?

After football, Williams wants to return to Texas to finish his degree in education. He has a long way to go and needs about 70 credit hours. After graduating, he wants to go to medical school to be an osteopathic physician so he can offer patients a holistic approach to healing.

“When I retired and I had a chance to be by myself outside of being a football player, I found I enjoy helping people and I had a gift for making people feel better,” he said.

Williams said he reads a lot of self-help books, often with metaphysical subjects. But nothing too wild, he said.

“I’m not a UFO guy,” he said.

In a similar story, apparently, Michael Vick has been reading lots of books on politics and plans on running for office once he gets out of prison. Either that or be a vet.


[]: Ricky Williams, M.D.
[]: 10 years later, Williams looks forward

New England Patriots

50 Cent ain’t got jack on Mercury Morris

You might not like the Patriots; hell, you might hate the Patriots. Hell, we hate the Patriots (that damn Tom Brady and his stunning good looks). But you have to be rooting for an undefeated season and clean sweep of the playoffs; even if it’s for no other reason than to simply shut Mercury Morris the heck up.

Oh, this guy isn’t living in the past. His beats are even ancient. We’re surprised his rap didn’t start off “I’m Mercury Morris and I’m here to say…“. Man we hope karma bites Morris right in the butt. Nothing would be sweeter than to see New England run the table AND Miami pull the ultimate 0-16 choke job. Hey, he’d always have ’72.

Miami Dolphins

Thanks for the memories Ricky

Ricky Williams’ comeback didn’t last too long. One game, six carries, 15 yards, one fumble and a torn pectoral muscle after he was activated, it was all over. Williams will miss the remainder of the season and spend the next four to six weeks in a sling. Rehab is an additional five months.

The injury occurred in the second quarter of Monday Night Football‘s contest between the Fins and the Steelers when Williams bobbled the ball and in the scramble to recover it, Pittsburgh linebacker Lawrence Timmons stepped on his shoulder. Now, Ricky is a big boy, but Timmons is 234 pounds of beef and when that kinda mass walks on you it’s probably going to do some damage.

Despite the injury, the biggest blow had to be to Williams’ ego. He gave up his comfortable world of marijuana and yoga for this?! The embarrassing retirement, the suspensions, the Argonauts, the random drug tests, the media barrage and all the reticule was just to get put back on the shelf? Oh well, there’s always next year. Wait, it’s Ricky; there’s no telling if he can resist the temptations of life long enough to even be around next year.

Hell, from what we know of Ricky, he probably toked up as soon as he heard the bad news. On the bright side of things, the Dolphins’ date with 0-16 is looking more and more like a reality everyday.


[TSN]: Ricky Williams’ latest comeback lasted one game.
[]: Ricky Williams out for season after just 6 carries

Miami Dolphins

The Dolphins used their heads for 59:43 of MNF; D’oh!

The Dolphins had an opportunity to get their first taste of the win column, but that ol’ fashioned Miami ineptitude shown though when it mattered to keep their chase for history hitting full stride.

The Fins had what we believe was a sober Ricky Williams back and they managed to keep the ill weathered contest knotted up at nothing going into the final minute until Jeff Reed nailed a 24-yarder for the first, last and only score of the game. The only thing uglier than the game was the field, yet somehow, on a rain drenched mess of mud and turf, Ben Roethlisberger was incredibly accurate, going 18-of-21 for 165 yards and keyed the final drive that put Reed into position.

For fantasy fanatics, it was a complete waste of time that probably left you screaming at the television on more than one occasion. Unless you were banking on a shutout to get you a victory then it was a completely barren wasteland at Heinz Field. And if you were banking on a Dolphins shutout then you’re probably sitting in the cellar of your league anyways.

It was the longest scoreless tie since 1943 with Pittsburgh’s lead lasting for only the final 17 seconds of the game and it was the first 3-0 final since 1993. Williams was equally pathetic, rushing six times for 15 yards before getting a shoulder injury in his return.

These Dolphins appear to be on a crash course with destiny after narrowly avoiding that close call. Now, if we can just get Miami to keep this thing rolling for five more games…c’mon baby!


[]: Dolphins drop to 0-11 in Ricky’s return

Miami Dolphins


It’s “Big JT”; what else can we say.

Okay, just so we’re clear; you did all of this for the Dolphins and Giants?

Houston Texans

Passing on Vince Young is no longer the most embarrassing moment in Texans history

It was a sick scene on the field of Reliant Stadium when Dolphins’ quarterback Trent Green collapsed to the field after being kneed in the head by Texans’ defensive tackle Travis Johnson. Watching Green lay motionless for a second consecutive year after a brutal hit was scary, but the nausea was due to Johnson’s behavior following the contact.

Johnson stood over Green’s immobile body and taunted him because he felt that Green had taken a cheap shot for his knees. Truth is, it looks like he did. So, if Green had bounced up, we wouldn’t have seen any problem with Johnson going over and slapping him upside his head. That penalty would have been understandable. Instead, the Texans were hit with a 15-yard flag for classless and disgusting behavior.

Luckily, despite suffering a concussion, Green appears to be okay and he flew home with the team after being checked out at the hospital. Not that any of that seemed to matter to an irate Johnson after the game.

The bottom line is, it was a malicious hit. It was uncalled for,” Johnson said. “He’s like the scarecrow. He wants to get courage while I wasn’t looking, and hit me in my knee instead of trying to hit me in my head. God don’t like ugly, you know what I mean?

“My knee ain’t never hurt like it hurt today,” Johnson said. “If you want to hit me, hit me in my head, hit me in my chest, don’t hit me in my knee. I’m trying to eat just like everybody else. So, to hit me like that, that showed me what type of man he was.

What makes Johnson’s behavior even more revolting is that his own teammate, fellow defensive tackle Cedric Killings broke a vertebra in his neck just two weeks ago. He left the field on a stretcher, just like Green. The Texans should be utterly embarrassed that Johnson is a member of their organization after these outbursts.


[]: Green Sustains Concussion as Dolphins Remain Winless

Miami Dolphins

Jay Feely doesn’t care for Ricky Williams or his kind bud

In a time when many athletes remain tight lipped about how they really feel about league troublemakers, the last person you’d ever expect to speak up is a friggin’ kicker. But Miami Dolphins kicker Jay “Touchy” Feely didn’t hold anything back when someone asked him what he thought about the possible return of Ricky Williams to the team.

No, I want a locker room full of guys who aren’t going to quit on us or fold when it’s tough and take the easy way out,” Feely said.

“You quit with your actions just as well as you quit with your decisions,” Feely said. “You know you’re getting tested and you decide to smoke a joint. That’s quitting on your teammates just as much as walking away from the game.”

“I want a guy I could trust,” Feely said. “I’d rather have a marginally talented player who gives me everything he’s got every day at practice and in the games, than someone with better talent who gives their best effort just on some days.

Of course, Feely also made sure to cover his ass just in case the pothead actually makes it back into the Dolphins’ locker room.

While Cameron has said he won’t discuss Williams’ situation until he is officially reinstated, Feely said Williams is never brought up around the locker room.

“Not at all. I’ve never heard a word about him ever since he failed that test,” Feely said. “But if Cam and [GM Randy Mueller] decide to bring him back, I’d embrace him as a teammate.

Good move Jay; after all, no matter how foolish Ricky might be, he’s still Ricky Williams and you’re still a kicker and he’s still a whole lot bigger than you. Stoned or not; he would whoop your butt.


[]: Jay Feely: `I don’t want Ricky Williams on team’

Miami Dolphins

Roger Goodell is licking his chops over some new blood

Now that Pacman Jones is looking at spending some serious time in jail and will probably never play in the NFL again, you’re probably wondering who’s going to give you your dose of pro football foolishness. Well look no further than the Miami Dolphins’ Frederick Davis to carry the torch.

Early Saturday morning, Miami Beach police arrested Davis outside of a nightclub after he forced his way into a taxi and then refused to get out. Eventually, Davis was tasered twice by the cops, but not without a fight. One cop got bit by Davis and another received scraps on her knee during the encounter.

Davis got nailed with a whole laundry list of charges that not only pissed off his coach, but are sure to arouse the anger of the mighty Roger Goodell. And that is the last thing any young player wants. But this again begs the question, when are these idiots going to learn? Despite the incredible physical strain being placed on your body, the NFL is one of the single greatest jobs on the face of the planet. All you have to do is act like an adult and mind your Ps and Qs and the money will continue to come rolling in. There shouldn’t be anything, including a night of drinking, that’s worth losing the fame, fortune and free time. Obviously, the commissioner is not going to tolerate this type of law breaking, image smearing behavior from anyone in the league and he’s willing to make examples out of as many as it takes. You might as well chalk up Davis to the list of Pacman, Michael Vick, the entire Bengals team, and Tank Johnson as the early big losers of the Goodell era.


[]: Miami Dolphins Player Arrested on South Beach

Miami Dolphins

The NFL is screwing Dolphins fans

It’s bad enough that the Dolphins have a “home” game against the NY Giants in London, now the NFL is treating it like some sold out secret Prince concert and telling Dolphins fans that if they buy tickets to the game in London, they have to pick them up themselves.

So let’s say that you buy your tickets for the London game and have an unavoidable scheduling conflict (like one of your idiot friends schedules a wedding that weekend), you couldn’t resell your tickets, even at face value. We understand that the NFL is trying to curb scalping but considering that a lot of NFL teams have a “marketing agreement” with ticket resellers, this seems awfully hypocritical. The NFL can profit all they want, but you cannot.

By the way, notice that this was a home game for the Dolphins but not the Giants. God forbid the NFL takes away a home game from the Giants. At least they were making it a little more even, they usually just try to give the Giants extra home games.


[sun Sentinel]: NFL doesn’t want Dolphins fans re-selling London game tickets

Miami Dolphins

Daunte Culpepper: from Madden cover to CFL?

Think about this for a second: Daunte Culpepper went from throwing for 39 touchdowns and 4,717 yards in 2004 and an MVP candidate to possibly being exiled to the Canadian Football League in three quick years.

With the trade for Trent Green, the Dolphins have no need for Culpepper anymore. Culpepper has asked the Dolphins for his release so he can pick his next stop but Miami is trying to trade him. Considering they got Trent Green for a 5th round pick, they might get a 7th round pick for Culpepper if anyone is desperate enough for damaged goods.

Meanwhile, the Winnipeg Blue Bombers (who never saw a PR opportunity they didn’t like) have put Culpepper on the “negotiation list” which means they have the rights to him should he decide to play in the CFL. While this is a no lose situation — it’s not like they had to buy his rights — most people don’t expect Daunte to end up in Canada. Still, everyone said the same thing about Ricky and the Argonauts.

If this comes to fruition, it will be absolutely the biggest drop in profile for a former Madden cover player. Well, until Michael Vick gets arrested and kicked out of the league for dog fighting.

[WBAL]: Culpepper To Dolphins: Release Me
[]: Culpepper put on negotiation list