Categories
Pittsburgh Steelers

Jerome Bettis relieves himself in lavish luxury and so can you


The old man used to have an unusual obsession when we were growing up, he wanted to visit every public restroom in America and write a book about his experiences. Unfortunately, after making the trip to a few filthy truck stops and rest stops outside of the city limits, that dream was quickly flushed down the toilet. However, if he’d just head to Jerome Bettis’ Grille 36 in Pittsburgh then it could be just what the doctor ordered to get those old creative juices flowing (no pun intended) once again.

The Jerome Bettis’ Grille 36 on Pittsburgh’s North Shore has been chosen as one of 10 finalists for America’s best public restroom.

The grille’s restrooms feature custom marble tile, plus a one-way mirror above the urinals in the men’s room, which lets patrons see out into the bar.

“The lighting is dim, so I guess it’s a comfortable atmosphere for your restroom needs,” said manager Candy Mann.

“You can see most of the TVs on the back wall, and all of your friends and relatives,” said entertainment engineer Jake Karan. “You can check on your girlfriend, too.”

It is the first time the restaurant has been nominated for the “America’s Best Restroom” contest. You can vote for it at www.BestRestroom.com.

We appreciate all the effort from the Bus to make everyone feel at home when upon his throne, but there’s just something about dropping a deuce from 95 floors up that just can’t be beat. Sorry, Jerome, but our vote is going to the Windy City.

Links:

[ThePittsburghChannel.com]: Jerome Bettis Grille 36 Nominated For Best Restroom

Categories
MLB General

Rick Sutcliffe has a one-track mind: Erin Andrews

We think Erin Andrews is the bee’s knees, baby, and we don’t care if the whole world knows it and apparently, neither does Rick Sutcliffe. During last night’s game between the Braves and the Cubbies, the topic of Andrews’ ensemble hit the booth and we’ll be damned if Sutcliffe just couldn’t contain himself, letting the whole world know exactly what was on his mind during batting practice earlier in the day. And it wasn’t his upcoming cancer surgery.

Links:

[Big League Stew]: Rick Sutcliffe is concerned for Erin Andrews’ skirt in Chicago

Categories
All Other Sports

This is what happens when the Harlem Globetrotters reject your application

If you thought finger jousting was a horrible, horrible idea then just wait until you get a load of the latest sports sensation sweeping the nation: spinning stuff!

See more funny videos at CollegeHumor

It might be stupid, but it still beats the hell out of competitive beer pong.

Categories
NBA General

Top Ten Signs an NBA Game is Fixed

Thanks to Tim Donaghy’s latest accusations, the NBA is once again under the microscope and everyone is wondering about the legitimacy of this year’s Finals and the playoff outcomes along the way. Luckily, we have David Letterman who has a Top Ten list that can clear up all the questions about whether or not a game is crooked. Here’s the Top Ten Signs an NBA Game Is Fixed:

10.Game begins 20 minutes before visiting team arrives

9.Tip-off always goes to the player with the largest salary

8.At the end of the first quarter, the score is 179 to 2

7.Missed three-pointers count for two points if they’re “pretty close”

6.One of the Laker Girls looks suspiciously like Pete Rose

5.Whenever he’s open, referee takes a shot

4.Scoreboard has disclaimer: “All Scores Approximate”

3.The team loses even though it led in points, delegates and the popular vote

2.Jack Nicholson scores 25 points from his seat

And the No. 1 sign an NBA game is fixed

1.The Knicks win

Links:

[CBS.com]: Top Ten Signs an NBA Game Is Fixed

Categories
Boston Celtics

Odds and Ends: How well do you know Rajon Rondo?


You’d think Rajon Rondo would have enough on his plate as it is with the bum ankle and The NBA Finals going on and all, but Rondo is no normal man. See, while he’s rehabbing and studying tape, he’s also giving back to all his fans out there. But you better know your random Rondo trivia.

I’m going to challenge you with some trivia – see how much you know about me. Get the answers right and I’ll send you an autographed headband. If a bunch of people get them right then I’ll hit the first three. I’m going to do this every day through the rest of the Finals so if you don’t get the first one right you’ll have another shot.

We’ll start with a high school question. I went to Oak Hill Academy and 2004 I set the school record for most assists in a game with 31. Who’s record did I break?

Get it right and I’m sending you a headband. Hit me back. I’ll holla

In other news…

[The Slanch Report]: Nutty 50 minute brawl at minor league baseball game

[Sportaphile.com]: Vernon Davis grabs some of Flavor Flav’s sloppy seconds

[The World of Isaac]: Fights you’d love to watch over and over and over again

[YardBarker.com]: What do we gotta do to get this kid in the ring with Chris Leben?

[Epic Carnival]: 10 reasons sports should go green

[TMZ.com]: Tommy Lasorda is old and impatient

[MixMakers.net]: Paul Pierce’s special edition jersey hits the shelves

And finally, the evolution of the fist bump.

Categories
LA Lakers

Kobe Bryant keeps firing away after Game 3 ends

Nobody on Boston could stop Kobe Bryant on Tuesday night as he dropped 36 points in an 87-81 victory, giving the Lakers their first win of the series. After the game, Bryant remained untouchable, weaving his way through the fast-fingered censors to get off this s-bomb during the post game press conference.

Categories
New York Giants

Giants’ Super Bowl rings get jacked in Ocean’s Eleven-style job

All, and we mean all, the odds we’re stacked against the New York Giants this past season, but they overcame, shocking the world by defeating the undefeated Patriots in the Super Bowl. Well, after all their hard work, some of the fellas don’t even have there championship bling to show for it.

Local police are investigating a robbery in Attleboro, Massachusetts, in which $1 to $2 million in gold and diamond jewelry was stolen over the weekend, including New York Giant Super Bowl rings, designed in conjunction with a consortium of Giants players and high-end jeweler Tiffany & Co.

According to local press reports, the burglars disabled the alarm system at E.A. Dion Inc, cut a hole in the roof and lifted a 1,000-pound safe through the ceiling, fleeing with it. The theft was discovered Sunday when an employee arrived at the store.

Police said there were no suspects and declined to comment further.

The white gold New York Giant Super Bowl rings are set with 1.5 carats of diamonds and designed to be big, seen 10 tables away at a restaurant.

According to reports, it’s the biggest heist in Attleboro’s history and ranks just behind the Memphis heist of Pau Gasol by the Lakers for the country’s largest robbery of 2008.

Links:

[IndexOnline.com]: Jewelry Robbers Nab Super Bowl Rings

Categories
NBA General

Jeff Van Gundy is gold in the booth! Gold!

We never thought we’d say this, but we love Jeff Van Gundy! We can’t get enough of the guy and he is quickly climbing our list of former annoyances turned into priceless gold. In fact, if he keeps this up, he’ll soon be joining Jim Rome and Bill Walton right at the top. After all, who else can slaughter Nick Lachey’s name, admit to a monster crush on Alyssa Milano and then start cracking bald jokes all in the span of a quarter?


JVG Final
by bsap11

Yup, you’re bald and we’re loving it.

Links:

[Awful Announcing]: Van Gundy Has Lost His Mind, Talks Alyssa Milano And Haircuts During Game Three

Categories
General Sports

Maria Sansone is officially the hottest sideline reporter of all time, sorry Erin

On Tuesday, we told you about our unhealthy obsession with female sports reporters like Erin Andrews and Charissa Thompson. Now, we take it one step further; rather, All Balls takes it one step further, putting together a list of “The 10 Hottest Sideline Reporters Of All Time.” But this is no ordinary list.

This list has been done before, but I don’t think it’s ever truly been done properly. You will not find the likes of Suzy Kobler, Rachel Nichols or Lindsay Soto anywhere on this list. It’s not because they’re not really hot because they are. The fact is that there is a new super breed of female sideline reporters that were once Hawaiian Tropic girls and Playboy playmates.

10.Shana Hiatt

9.Lisa Guerrero

8.Melissa Stark

7.Pam Oliver

6.Jamie Little

5.Lisa Dergan Podsednik

4.Erin Andrews

3.Jill Arrington

2.Charity Hodges

1.Maria Sansone

It takes a lot for us to concede our girl Erin Andrews to No. 4, but we’re willing to give on this one. However, the All Balls crew obviously tied on one too many appletinis during the list’s construction. C’mon, Pam Oliver?!?! For real??

Links:

[All Balls]: The 10 Hottest Sideline Reporters Of All Time

Categories
Tampa Bay Buccaneers

Odds and Ends: Chris Simms is a cry baby

Chris Simms is mad as hell and he’s not going to take it anymore. The former Texas quarterback ripped Jon Gruden and virtually ended his relationship with the Tampa Bay Buccaneers on Monday when he claimed to have become a “hostage” of the franchise.

“I feel like I’m being held hostage,” Simms said. “I hate that all this has happened. I love Tampa. My family loves it here. But I’ve been quiet long enough. I feel like it’s time to let everybody know why I’m not out there.”…

“I don’t know how anybody can expect me to go back there and look coach Gruden in the eye and believe the relationship is hunky dory after some of the things that were said and done,” Simms said. “Things were handled wrongly from the business end of it and definitely things were handled wrongly as far as how you treat a person. …

“How can I look (Gruden) in the eye when I know he wanted me cut last year. He did not want me to be part of the team and I have a lot of resentment about that. Nine or 10 months after a serious injury, I put my life on the line, it was the most serious injury they’ve ever been associated with, I worked as hard as I could to get back and he wasn’t even going to give me a full year.

“I have a serious issue with that, I really do.” …

“He asked me, ‘Is this injury in your head?'” Simms said. “I found that completely ridiculous. I was going through a tough time. I kept my mouth shut all summer. I felt I was betrayed to a degree. Nobody took time to talk to me on a personal level and see how I was doing.”

Geez, what a loser. Even daytime soap operas think Simms is being overly dramatic.

In other news…

[YardBarker.com]: Another day, another bobblehead

[Your Face is a Sports Blog]: Big Brown and Tim Donaghy have a lot in common

[The Big Lead]: Apparently, Chicago’s fans aren’t the only ones who hate Cedric Benson

[TMZ.com]: Jason Caffey is a dead-beat dad times 10

[CBS2.com]: Vinny Del Negro could be the new head baby Bull

[The Sports Muffin]: Vince McMahon gets tossed into UFC announcement rumors

[SI.com]: Jason Peter is a maniac!

[Busted Coverage]: Detroit reporter says Pittsburgh has better hockey fans

[FunnyOrDie.com]: WTF?!?

And finally, goodbye testicles.


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