Category: Olympics

olympics

Bill Plaschke is what he eats

Links: [The Big Lead]: Bill Plaschke Went to Beijing and Ate a Penis

Easiest first place finish in the history of competitive swimming

We’ve been known to sit on the couch for hours/days on end, stuffing our faces full of Doritos and washing them down with cases upon cases of Coors Light, but even our pathetic, flabby bodies could have pulled out a victory in this race. See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

A simple solution for how the USA can dominate the Olympics

The Olympics are right around the corner, Friday to be exact, and we can’t wait to see the red, white and blue go berserk on some foreigner asses. And while we’re confident in Team USA, regardless of sport, we know America would have a definite edge over the competition in the individual sports if we […]

Say hello to your official mascots of the 2008 Olympics

If you thought the Mighty Morphing Power Rangers, Voltron or The Planeterers were some incredible teams then you’ll appreciate the collaborative efforts of Fuwa; not to be mistaken with FUPA. In case you didn’t know, Fuwa is a collection of five characters who will be the Official Mascots of the Beijing 2008 Olympic Games. Frankly, […]

Odds and Ends: Hair today, gone tomorrow

The Olympics are rapidly approaching and the one question on everyone’s mind is, “Will the Nigerian football team players cut off their sweet locks or what?” Nigeria’s Olympic football coach Samson Siasia has warned his players that he expects short hair and correct clothing for the Beijing Games, a federation spokesman said on Friday. Siasia, […]

Now that’s what you call a Worley bird!

Everybody is getting hyped up for the Olympics. OK, so some people couldn’t care any less about the Games, but that’s why here. Don’t forget, the Olympics aren’t always just about grace, power and athleticism; sometimes, they are about moments like these. Classic commentator comment of the day: “And it was going great…until there. When […]

Tyson Gay is not a homosexual, not that there’s anything wrong with that

Wondering about the results from the U.S. Olympic track trials over the weekend? Don’t worry, you’re not the only one, we’ve spent the past 72 hours playing GTA4 while the ol’ ladies went to a bridal shower in Phoenix. Despite the three-day diet of Pizza Pockets and Miller High Life, it was a near perfect […]

Hey, Beijing, are you ready for these guys?!

Team USA is still looking for that perfect combination of mad skillz and selflessness from the NBA’s best ballers in attempt to erase years of frustration at the hands of its international competition. When the team travels to Beijing in a little over a month, they might be sporting the best roster they’ve had since […]

Are you a squatter? If you’re going to the Olympics you better be

Beijing ran into yet another roadblock as they prepare to host the 2008 Olympics. Now it seems there is a problem with, of all things, the toilets. Apparently, most of the Chinese are squatters; not the homeless kind of squatters who live in abandoned buildings, but actual squatters…you know, when they go. Problem is, most […]

Horses get turned into glue when they get old, horse riders go to the Olympics

We’ve always heard that life goes straight downhill at 30. By that point, your washed up, fragile, mentally lost, physically weak and your only options left in life are to join ESPN or learn the samba on Dancing With the Stars. Oh, wait; that only applies to NFL running backs. Turns out 30 years old […]

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