Category: Cincinnati Bengals

cincinnati-bengals

The Quote Machine Chad Johnson does it again

Chad Johnson easily reigns as the league’s funniest guy, but, apparently, Ocho Cinco isn’t all fun-n-games because he’s already planning on how he can injury Carson Palmer in a fight. Why you laughing? We’re serious. We’ve said it before and we’ll say it again, nothing gets the NFL juices flowin’ like a little preseason premeditated […]

Hey, Carson, how’s their ass taste?

Carson Palmer recently talked smack about Ohio State and Buckeye nation is not happy. So, for revenge, the Bengals quarterback is getting slammed in a parody of The Needle and the Damage Done. It’s not as intimidating as a parody rap could have been, but we still think it should get the point across. Neil […]

Chad Johnson is committed to laying the smacketh down on every citizen of earth

If you ever met Chad Johnson, what would you say? More importantly, what would you want him to say? You might not even know it, but you want him to deliver some gum-flapping, spittle-spraying, momma-ragging trash talk in your direction. Odds are, you’ll never get close enough to Ocho-Cinco that he’d unload on you, but […]

The Bengals are not big bird lovers

With a 1-2 record, the Cincinnati Bengals fans a putting up with a lot of crap. But the poop that’s been being produced on the field each week is the least of fans’ worries. Eric Brown is the managing director at Paul Brown Stadium and he’s asking the city for permission to kill crap-dispensing pigeons […]

Deltha O’Neal’s rottweiler gains one more small measure of revenge for dogs of the world

We all know that America is having a sudden love fest for pit bulls and dogs in general after some athlete, we forget who, got in trouble for running an entire dogfighting operation out of his house. But, like people, some damn dogs are just plain mean. Now, we don’t know if that’s the case […]

Chad Johnson’s celebration leaves T.K. wanting more

After guaranteeing the world that he’d rock our socks off when he crossed the goal line, Chad Johnson didn’t disappoint us with his delayed creativity. While the spontaneous imagination (and by spontaneous we mean scripted) has been somewhat dampened by the NFL rule changes, if you’ve got a couple extra minutes to wait around before […]

Getting arrested is no way to make the Bengals roster

Let say you’re a second year running back who was on the Bengals’ practice squad last year. Let’s say you were signed to the offseason roster and trying to make the active roster this year. Wouldn’t the absolute last thing you do is get arrested? Well, not Quincy Wilson. Wilson was arrested around 3 a.m. […]

Chad Johnson shuts us up

A while back we told Chad Johnson that he should reconsider racing a horse because we thought that he’d get smoked. Well, when you’re wrong, you’re wrong and this time we were wrong. Ocho-Cinco ended up being the one doing the smoking (no, not that kind of smoking) as he torched that colt like he […]

Bengals doesn’t want any part of Odell Thurman’s mess

Some guys just can’t help themselves. Take a look at Odell Thurman — already suspended from the league for skipping a drug test and driving drunk, Odell has been accused of assaulting two men at a private residence. Two men claim that Odell Thurman assaulting them early Sunday (after partying till the wee hours of […]

Someone might want to check Chad Johnson for horse steroids

So, if you had to guess, which NFL player would you say is crazy enough to race a friggin’ horse? Give up? Well, we all know that Ray Buchanan would probably guess it would be Shannon Sharpe but Sharpe doesn’t have the stones to go one-on-one with a stallion. You gotta be a batshit, fruit-loopy, […]

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