Tag: crime

Categories
Florida Panthers

Ed Belfour picks a fight with a cop


There must be something in the Miami water system that makes athletes go nuts because James Posey wasn’t the only athlete to get wasted and do something stupid last night.

Ed Belfour was arrested early this morning after he refused to leave a South Beach bar and decided that he would settle the dispute in a good ol’ slugfest, just like on the ice. Belfour took a “fighting stance” and shoved the police officer who was to assist him from the club. Then the Florida Panthers goalie really started resisting.

Belfour pulled away from the officer trying to arrest him and grabbed his shirt. The hockey player then fell forward on the ground, kicking and refusing to place his hands behind his back, the report said.

The skirmish ended when the cop zapped the blitzed Belfour with a Taser gun. Very becoming, you stay classy Eddie.

Police reported that Belfour had slurred speech, blood shot eyes and smelled of alcohol and charged him with disorderly intoxication and resisting an officer without violence. Too bad there’s no “resisting an officer with a tantrum” charge on the books.

Belfour’s partner in crime was teammate Ville Peltonen who got picked up on charges of criminal mischief after snapping a pole off a fire truck. But who cares, after all he didn’t even get electrocuted.

Links:

[MSNBC]: Belfour arrested after trying to fight cop
[Local10.com]: Panther players arrested in alleged police scuffle

Categories
All Other Sports

Odds and Ends: Help a fat man run the Boston Marathon


We’ve got a weird ebay auction for you today. The first is a fat guy who is going to run the Boston Marathon for charity. He is not officially entered in the marathon but will run behind as a “bandit”. If he can’t finish the marathon, the winning bidder can put any tattoo on his back.

OK, this guy weighs 438 pounds and has 3 months to prepare. You know what the chances of him finishing the marathon are? None. Slim was never even in the building. This auction benefits the American Cancer Society but we’re not sure how good the press is going to be when this guy drops dead after 2 miles.

In other news…

[Chicago Tribune]: The Blackhawks can’t even give tickets away

[Can’t Stop the Bleeding]: Yankees minor league mascot busted for soliciting a 14-year-old boy for sex. How did Chris Hanson miss this opportunity?

[The Good Phight]: Protection: What the numbers say

[MLB Fanhouse]: Dontrelle Willis and Friends Made It Rain in Spring Training

[NBA.com]: Chinese nicknames for NBA players

Categories
College Football

Florida Gator arrested for shooting rifle in the air


In a very Stephen Jackson-esque move, Florida offensive lineman, Ronnie Matthew Wilson, was arrested this morning on charges of aggravated assault, simple battery and use or display of a concealed weapon during the commission of a felony after he shot his gun into the air as he argued with another man. Oh, but this was no regular gun, Wilson whipped out a semi-automatic rifle from his trunk to intimidate the other guy. Wilson told police that he wanted the man “to know how it felt to be scared.” We’re guessing that it worked to perfection.

The victim is claiming that Wilson hocked a big ol’ loogie on him and then slapped him down like a bitch. Wilson admits to the spitting but denies the hitting.

Like any good athlete, the 6-3, 300 pounder is quick on his feet. After firing off the rifle, Wilson made a mad dash into an apartment complex and stashed the evidence at his cousin’s crib. Is it just us or does this seem like it should be in an episode of Cops?

Links:

[TheLedger.com]: Florida player arrested for allegedly shooting rifle in air

Categories
College Football

Hey bro, I just said it’d be nice if you could come to the game



We talkin bout practice!

It’s nice when a man cares so much about his brother that he will go out of his way to attend a spring scrimmage for the Carolina Gamecocks. Not only did Demetrius Pepper shoot a coworker at his grocery store in the face and steal her car to get to the game, when that car broke down, he shot and killed a retired schoolteacher and stole her car. That’s perseverance folks. He didn’t just give up because the first car broke down. Nope, he had a meaningless scrimmage game to go to.

Demetrius was arrested just 15 minutes after the game started when someone noticed a suspicious car outside the stadium and police found him at the vehicle that belonged to the slain schoolteacher. He is being held without bail.

Nathan Pepper, who is a sophomore defensive tackle at USC, had no comment. You have to feel sorry for the two shooting victims who were simply at the wrong place at the wrong time when Demetrius went batshit crazy and decided it was perfectly ok to shoot people and steal cars because he needed to get somewhere. Guess what Demetrius, it’s gonna be even harder to see the games from prison.

Links:
[The State]: Man charged with murder

Categories
Tampa Bay Buccaneers

Lionel Gates gets locked up



And I thought I was nuts.

Tampa Bay running back Lionel Gates is a piece of trash. Even Mike Tyson thinks Gates went too far after he punched a pregnant woman in the face before he shoved her into a wall on Thursday night. Gates is currently sitting in jail without bond on charges of burglary of a dwelling, aggravated battery of a pregnant woman and criminal mischief.

Gates went ballistic at the apartment of Peggy Lavender as he kicked in the front door, smashed a pair of TV’s and went Ron Artest on Lavender.

Charges such as those facing Lionel Gates are taken seriously by the Buccaneers organization,” the team said in a statement. “We plan to meet with Lionel as soon as possible after which we will deal with this matter appropriately.

If the Bucs have any guts at all they will kick this punk off their team without any further questions asked and Roger Goodell will ban him from the league. But that’s just our wishful thinking, after all, he has yet to make an example out of Chris Henry or Pacman Jones, and their criminal history reads like a novel.

Links:

[TBO.com]: Bucs player accused of assaulting pregnant woman
[CBSSportsline.com]: Bucs RB Gates arrested, charged with assaulting pregnant woman

Categories
MLB General

Odds and Ends: Ugueth Urbina’s comeback with the Phillies will be slightly delayed


Little known fact: Ugueth Urbina throws right, bats right, but he wields a machete with his left hand. Who knew? ell… the 5 workers on his farm who were attacked by Urbina and other men. The 32-year-old “free” agent was sentenced to 14 years in prison for attempted murder by the Venezuelan judicial system.

His lawyer said that the punishment was too severe, probably because if he’d done that in the United States, the defense attorneys would have trotted out his coach and a teammate to say what a great guy his is and he would have only gotten four months in prison. Guess the Fightin’s have to look elsewhere to solve their bullpen problem.

In other news..

[The Offside]: Partying with P-Diddy makes you look like you belong on Faces of Meth

[NBA Fanhouse]: Jeff Van Gundy wants lottery open to all teams

[Boston Herald]: As if having their coach murdered wasn’t enough, Pakistani cricket team welcomed home with “Go to hell” chants

[Our Book of Scrap]: Want to write for SI? Better get that boob job

And finally, a couple of stories from Steroid Nation. First, HGH was found in Anna Nicole Smith‘s autopsy. (Jesus, is there anyone not on HGH? Where can we order a batch? Anyone have Jason Grimsley’s phone number?) Second, if you need your glamour photos done and Glamour Shots by Deb is all booked up, you can have Tony Mandarich do them.

Categories
NFL General

Hey Goodell, we’re still waiting on the personal conduct policy



Chris Henry

For all the talk about about Roger Goodell instituting a league personal conduct policy during the owners meetings, it looks like it won’t get done till sometime before the NFL draft in late April. Since sources say that the sanctions might be applied retroactively (which doesn’t make sense at all to us but the NFL has more power than God), it’s liable to affect players who are still getting into trouble now because they don’t know any better, or at least that’s what their agents will say on appeal.

First up is our old friend Chris Henry. The latest incident for Henry is being cited for three traffic chargers: driving with a suspended license, failure to wear a seatbelt, and making an improper turn. All very minor stuff but you can’t get into any trouble if you’ve already been arrested 4 times in the last 14 months.

Second up is Broncos wide receiver Brandon Marshall who was arrested for false imprisonment and domestic violence charges after an argument with his girlfriend at their Colorado home. This seems to be one of those trumped up charges since his girlfriend had no injuries and the “false imprisonment” charge was Marshall blocking her taxi with his car to prevent her from leaving. In a romantic comedy, that’s the denouement, in real life, it’s a crime.

In any case, Pacman Jones is scheduled to meet with Roger Goodell on April 3rd. Here’s how the meeting will go:


Goodell: Hello Adam, please tell me about all the times you’ve been arrested or questioned by the police since you came into the league.
Jones: Well, there was the assault charge… and the weapons charge… and there was the public intoxication… and then there was the marijuana charge… then there was the spitting incident with the Tennessee State ho… and then of course the NBA All-Star Game…

Goodell (to secretary): Got all that? Good. Clean that up and put everything he did in the “examples of violating the conduct policy” section. We’re done.

Links:
[USA Today]: Broncos WR arrested
[MSNBC]: ‘Pacman’ to meet with Goodell on April 3
[Cincinnati.com]: Traffic ticket terrible for Henry

Categories
Tennessee Titans

Pacman Jones might be going back to Vegas



Cartoon from Sportsline

Unfortunately, it’s not to gamble and hit the strip clubs. The Las Vegas police, which already has been accused of incompetence, is seeking felony and misdemeanor chargers against Pacman Jones for the triple shooting at a strip club during NBA All-Star Weekend.

Police still don’t know who did the shooting outside the club but want to charge Jones and two friends for the melee that broke out inside the club. You know, the one one where Pacman slammed a stripper’s head against the stage.

Pacman has got more problems though. The major issue during the NFL owners meeting in Arizona this week is the player conduct policy and Jones’s name comes up in every mention of how to discipline players who run afoul of the law or are consistently getting themselves into trouble otherwise.

The Titans are considering dumping Pacman Jones entirely to be rid of the headache and have released this statement:


The club is deeply disturbed that the alleged conduct of one of its players has resulted in felony charges in one state and accusations of felony conduct in another state.

Since the NFL is preparing to introduce a new player conduct policy and since criminal charges and investigations are in progress, comment or speculation would be inappropriate. The club is currently reviewing its options with respect to the player

One of Pacman’s attorneys said that Pacman is very concerned about a possible suspension by the NFL. Maybe he should have though of that sometime between the 9th and 10th time that he was questioned or arrested by police.

Links:
[AP]: ‘Pacman’ Jones may face felony charges

Categories
Tennessee Titans

Pacman’s hideout gets cleaned out


It shouldn’t be a shocker that Pacman Jones is once again involved with the law, but what should be surprising is that the law is actually on his side in this one.

Pacman’s Tennessee crib was robbed back around the beginning of the year and the sneaky bastard got away with over $209,000 worth of loot. That’s a pretty decent night’s work. Turns out that the thief and Jones share a lot of the same interests; apparently they both like expensive televisions, video games, cash, jewelry, computers, recording equipment and surveillance equipment (that could have come in handy). Some of the more gaudy items taken were an $80,000 watch, a necklace and chain worth $75,000 and $25,000 in dollar, dollar bills, ya’ll.

We have nothing to go on in this incident,” detective Jonathan Couey said. “We feel like there is the possibility that it could be someone who was acquainted with Mr. Jones, because they were able to get into the gate, which has a code, and they knew how to get into his house. If anyone has any information, we need them to contact us.

Things just keep going from bad to worse for Jones. But you know what they say, when it rains it pours.

Links:

[NashvileCityPaper.com]: Pacman’s home burglarized in January

Categories
All Other Sports

Plot to poison race horses uncovered


Remote control devices and poison darts were found at the Royal Hong Kong Jockey Club’s Happy Valley track. Staff there found long metal tubes filled with poisoned darts buried beneath the turf on the track. The tubes were wired together and linked to a wireless receiver. It is believed that someone wanted to use a remote control device to set off the darts and affect the outcome of races.

This is the most technologically advanced yet stupid plot we’ve ever heard of. According to the club’s chief executive, the darts were designed “to cause destruction and injury”. Now we’re probably not talking about a Barbaro-like collapse on the track but wouldn’t someone notice a dart hanging out of a horse? And wouldn’t it be a little suspicious when that horse eventually keeled over? And wouldn’t that render the race results void? Good luck collecting on that ticket.

To make it more moronic, the plot was planned at a race course with top security and which made almost $13 Billion last year. Not surprising that it didn’t work.

Links:
[Guardian UK]: Poison darts found at Hong Kong racetrack