Miami Dolphins

Jason Taylor gets Paul Pierced

What exactly is going on in Florida and professional athletes? Last year, Jerome McDougal of the Eagles was shot in the stomach in Miami. Now, Jason Taylor gets stabbed in the arm in a road rage incident on his way home from church in Davie with his wife Katina. (Does anyone else thinks it’s weird that Jason Taylor married Zach Thomas’ sister and even though she’s really hot, she kinda looks like Zach Thomas?)

Luckily, Taylor was was only clipped in the arm and was fine enough to go ahead and play in Derrick Brooks’ charity golf game. Who the hell decides it’s a good idea to stab a 6’6″ 250 lb guy in the arm? We’d think that would only make him angrier. Good thing Jason has a cool head or the Dolphins would be looking at a manslaughter charge.

[Sun Sentinel]: Dolphins’ Taylor stabbed in road-rage incident

All Other Sports

Duke lacrosse scandal update: bad luck or no imagination?

The dancer who accused the three Duke lacrosse players had previously accused 3 other men of rape 10 years ago but then backed off her story and the case was never pursued.

The woman’s father said Thursday his daughter was not raped in the 1996 incident.

The father said his daughter was held against her will by a group of men who had picked her up from school in Durham and drove her to Creedmoor. She was not sexually assaulted or injured in the encounter, he said, and she was returned home safely the same day.

This revelation, of course, has the Duke lax lawyers in full shark mode.

It certainly raises substantial questions about this woman’s credibility,” Cheshire said. “It’s awfully bothersome when both allegations of rape include three men. It gives one a lot of pause about her credibility. … This is a train off the track.

Like we said before, this is like a heavyweight title bout. This round goes to the lacrosse lawyers.

[News & Observer]: The woman who says she was raped by three Duke lacrose players had a previous case
[MSNBC]: Duke accuser alleged rape 13 years ago

Philadelphia Eagles

Dhani Jones gets arrested for dancing

Dhani Jones decided to take a girl dancing in the middle of a Miami street. Unfortunately, he was charged with a misdemeanor for obstructing traffic.

When asked to leave, the female figured it out and left, but he kept dancing in the street by himself.

Eagles fans think he should be arrested for being such a shitty linebacker. Although I guess next to Mark Simoneau, he’s practically the reincarnation of LT. There’s nothing worse than Jones doing his celebration after every tackle, especially since he doesn’t even play guitar in real life.

I’ve gone ahead and asked him what happened in Miami on his website. I doubt I’ll get a response.

By the way, via Fark comments comes this amusing anecdote about Dhani in college:

Dhani Jones was my year at U of Michigan. He was in the Residential College, which loosely translated to “artsy fartsy poetry writers.” Anyway, his answering machine message was (this was him saying it): “Don’t have a closed mind when leaving a message for Dhani Jones.

[]: Misstep for Birds’ Jones

NBA General

Isaiah Rider arrested for kidnapping a woman

Keeping the Jailblazer tradition alive

Isaiah J.R. Rider was arrested yesterday for kidnapping and battery in Marin, CA.   Now, when I read the headline, I thought perhaps Isaiah had pulled a Rick James and kidnapped some woman, chained her to the wall, and burned her cigarettes, but it turns out he just got into an argument with a female acquaintance and drove off with her against her will. Police her heard screaming and pulled him over.

Who could have possibly guessed that Isaiah was capable of such a thing. I mean, sure, he used to spit at fans and once kicked a woman in the back at an autograph signing, but, really, who hasn’t? I say let he who has never made a bong out of a Sprite can cast the first stone.

[]: Former NBA player Isaiah Rider arrested for kidnapping
[Naxcom]: Isaiah Rider rookie card = $0.10