General Sports

Odds and Ends: As if the restrooms at sports stadiums aren’t disgusting enough already

This is seriously one of the sickest old men man ever and he’s exactly why parents need to keep an eye on their kids at all times when attending a ball game.

A man whose trial two years ago made public a long-held fetish for drinking the urine of young boys has surfaced again in the Columbus area.

And according to complaints filed with Dublin police, his fetish still has him helpless to resist it. …

Official reports indicate he has been observed putting Saran wrap on toilet seats in public, sports-related venues with the apparent intent to drink any urine collected there.

It was that practice that drew Patton to the attention of Gahanna authorities in 2006. During his trial, authorities said he collected urine from boys at a movie theater — and at times even paid for it.

Seriously, not even Herbert the Pervert would do something that gross.

In other news…

[More Handy Than Capped]: Nick obviously never saw this before

[The Sports Muffin]: Wazzzup! Beer me!

[]: Karl Malone can’t get a ring in the NBA, so he’s heading to the NHL

[Faded Youth Blog]: Reggie Bush sports the sailor look, complete with big-assed hooker

[]: Six Flags isn’t always as much fun as the old dancing dude makes it seem

[]: Holland has our hearts

[Can’t Stop The Bleeding]: (SNARL) The Warrior is back (SNARL) and slower than ever (SNARL)

[Tirico Suave]: You can see it coming from a mile away, but it’s still hilarious

[]: Pacman’s old crib was massive

[]: A one-fingered salute to flipping the bird

And finally, the best video of a guy catching a batting practice home run ever recorded.

General Sports

Athletes and horrible ads, a match made in heaven

Now that we’re a good ways into the NBA playoffs, those damn split-screen commercials with a pair of All-Stars yapping about the importance of winning it all are really getting annoying. But they’re still better than some of the others ads athletes have taken part in and we’ve found a list of The Top 25 Hilarious Bad Athlete Commercials to prove it.

Here are our personal favorites:

Our one complaint with the list is, where the hell is the Peyton vs. Eli lick-off?!?


[The Angry T]: The Top 25 Hilarious Bad Athlete Commercials

Toronto Blue Jays

The Blue Jays poke fun at the Television Bureau of Canada

What do you do when one of your star players has a commercial pulled from the air by the Television Bureau of Canada. A commercial deemed to be too violent for its portrayal of Frank Thomas in a pillow fight with a young boy? Well, you go ahead and have a Frank Thomas pillow giveaway.

The marketing folks with the Blue Jays took advantage of all the random press and made September 2 Frank Thomas Kids Pillow Night. Brilliant. This certainly beats the Cardinals’ Tony LaRussa Bottle of Whiskey night.

We hope that the pillow doesn’t scare small children like the Ben Wallace throw pillow does.

[SC]: Frank Thomas can swing a mean pillow

Boston Red Sox

Matsuzaka marketing mania starts today with new Nike commercial

It’s Dice-K day in Boston as everyone is gearing up to watch Matsuzaka’s first start. Part of us wants to see him do well, but part of us always wants to witness the meltdown on Boston sports radio if he throws a clunker. Pressure? Just a little. And that’s the theme of this Nike commercial that’s only being aired in Japan.

It’s pure genius by the way. Nike and MLB are creating a huge legion of fans in Japan who will love the Sox and, almost as importantly, hate the Yankees. The ad takes a bit of artistic license. The opponent today won’t be the Yankees, but the lowly Royals. You see MLB working?

All Other Sports

Shaving another man isn’t gay right?

We can imagine the questions asked by UFC fighters Mark Coleman and Wanderlei Silva before agreeing to do a Shick commercial for Japanese television:

“This is definitely not airing in the United States right?”
“I only have to shave his… face… right?”
“Can there be a UFC Fighters are not gay disclaimer?”
“How much are we getting paid?”

God bless the Japanese and their crazy commercials.

[Ad Freak]: Ex-UFC fighters in a shave to the death

General Sports

For relaxing times, make it Hulk Hogan time

So, what do you do when you’re a washed up wrestler who is currently bringing home the bacon by starring in a dumb reality show? Well, if you’re the Hulkster you take off to the other side of the globe, attach your image to a crappy commercial and sing an off key lullaby in your underwear for Bigflow. Geez, guess he never expected this to make it back to America. The only question left is, “Whatcha gonna do when the whole world is pointing and laughing at you, brother!”


[]: Hogan knows best in Japanese commercial

Fantasy Baseball

Gotta love the random Geddy Lee appearance

Geddy Lee is one of the most underrated front men of all time. And it’s a little curious that he’s in this ESPN fantasy baseball commercial but it’s pretty damn amusing. Yeah yeah, we’re a little late on this but watching tourney coverage has seared this commercial into our brains. Any guesses as to who is doing the ghost singing for Kruk?

Gotta love Peter Gammons with the long hair. And is that Erin Andrews’ breasseses on the right? Oh and we’ll reserve commentary on John Kruk — we’re sure that the unimaginative bloggers hanging from Deadspin’s nuts fell all over themselves trying to be the first to make a “with leather” reference.

And as luck would have it, we just came across this comprehensive list of ESPN Sportscenter Commercials from Chicks Dig the Long Ball.

Washington Wizards

Gilbert Arenas’ new commercial

Adidas is perpetually trying to catch up with Nike, not just in sales but in their ad campaigns.  While Nike has always set the bar with great commercials, Adidas usually gives us stuff that doesn’t make much sense and isn’t very good.  Impossible is nothing?  Uhhhh…whatever.  

Anyway, Adidas is set to launch a whole new ad campaign featuring athletes and drawing… we guess to spotlight how creative athletes are or something.  Our favorite NBA nutjob Gilbert Arenas has a commercial in the campaign and while it’s designed to show how he overcame adversity to become “the rock star of the NBA“, it mostly just highlights that Gilbert can’t paint for shit.

[Ad Freak]: Art is therapy for athletes in Adidas ads