Categories
MLB General

The Full Count: Barry inching closer


The crawl to Aaron continues: Barry Bonds hit no. 751 on Tuesday against the Reds, a first inning blast off Aaron Harang into the right-centerfield seats. The Giants lost the game 7-3, and Bonds made sure to backhand his teammates by saying, “I’m playing pretty good for an old guy. I just wish we were playing better as a team.” That’s our Barry, always making nice. What made this game interesting was that it was the first time in over 30 years in which two players with that many homeruns played in the same game. Bonds (751) and Ken Griffey Jr’s (585) 1,336 homers are the third-most all-time between two players in the same game.

The players might have liked you, but I think you suck. We believe those were the words Rockies’ manager Clint Hurdle used when taking the closer’s job away from Brian Fuentes. Fuentes had already sewn up his third straight selection to the NL All-Star team before blowing four consecutive save opportunities, the first time anyone has done that in almost 20 years. Fuentes was one of the best closers in the league before melting in games against the Blue Jays, Cubs and Astros, with his ERA jumping from 1.89 to 4.17. He probably won’t lose the job permanantely, but Hurdle now plans on using the dreaded “bullpen by committee” approach.

Rookie what we have here Although his name may sound more like a NASCAR driver than a baseball player, Houston rookie Hunter Pence has been tearing it up for the Astros. Pence has been doing it all for Houston, including hitting a walk-off homerun for a 5-4 victory over the Phillies last night. It was the third time during their homestand that an Astro has sent ’em home happy with a game-winning homer. Since being called up on April 28th, the Fort Worth, TX product has hit 10 homeruns with 39 RBI while leading the Astros with a .345 batting average. He’s even outslugging Carlos Lee .590 to .517. He’s also playing a remarkable centerfield, as evidenced by his ridiculous catch off a Ryan Howard shot in the eigth inning. Pence climbed that stupid Tal’s Hill and caught the ball right next to the waiting-to-kill-somebody flagpole, 436 feet from home.

Player of the day: Brad Wilkerson, Rangers. 3-4, 3 HR, 6 RBI in an 8-3 win over the Angels.

Honorable Mention Player(s) of the day: The Kansas City Royals entire starting lineup. The Royals are a team that has never gotten a lot of respect offensively, but when they beat a team, they beat them like they stole something. For the third time in a month, the Royals put a 17 spot on the board –all in home games– by pounding the Mariners 17-3. 21-year-old Billy Butler led the way, driving in six runs by the second inning. The Royals beat the Phillies 17-5 on June 10th and the Cardinals 17-8 on June 14th. They also lost a 17-3 game to Oakland at home on May 10th.

Categories
Chicago Bears

Tank Johnson not legally drunk but still legally an idiot


It turns out that Tank Johnson’s blood alcohol level was only .072 last week which is below Arizona’s legal limit of .08. So Tank won’t be going to jail for DUI but he still was released by the Bears who were embarrassed by his legal troubles.

Now, before anyone (NFLPA) gets their panties in a bunch over the Bears cutting Johnson for something that’s not technically illegal, remember that this guy was about a month removed from jail and decided to drink and drive. If he’d gotten in the car 30 minutes earlier or if he hadn’t eaten 162 beef sticks, 40 honey buns, and 35 summer sausage blocks while in prison, he’d probably have pushed past the .08 level and be back in jail.

The Bears did the right thing by cutting him. Who knows when he’ll decide to pick up a few illegal firearms and cause further embarrassment to his team. He can now go and be the Raiders’ or the Cardinals’ problem.

Links:
[Yahoo]: Tank Johnson under legal limit in DUI arrest

Categories
MLB General

The Full Count: Clemens notches win #350


It’s still not as awesome as the Mile High Club, but Roger Clemens joined some exclusive company Monday night by notching career victory no. 350 as the Yankees beat the Twins 5-1. Clemens was his old dominant self, going eight innings, giving up two hits while walking none. He joined Warren Spahn as the only pitcher in the live ball era to win at least 350 games. Clemens now stands at eighth all-time in victories. If he can get 14 more, he can pass Spahn’s for fifth place. Perhaps unrealistiically, he can try to catch Grover Cleveland Alexander and Christy Mathewson for third place at 373 wins. Or, he can finally admit what we’ve been suspecting for years…that he’s replaced all of his muscles with cyborg parts and he plans on winning 512 games to surpass Cy Young as the all-time leader.

Let’s register firejohncclaren.com right now, because he now has a winning percentage of .000. John McClaren made his surprise managerial debut for the Seattle Mariners last night in Kansas City, as their eight-game winning streak came to an end against the Royals. McClaren, who was the bench coach as of Sunday, replaced possible AL manager of the year candidate Mike Hargrove, who suddenly resigned, citing a lost passion for the game. Despite a great outing from Felix Hernandez, the Mariners were only able to scratch out two runs and lost the game in the 11th on an anti-climatic sacrifice fly.

HEY! In case you haven’t noticed, the Indians have managed to win a few here and there, and are now threatening to lap the Detroit Tigers for first place in the AL Central. The Indians completed a four-game sweep of the perpetually lowly Devil Rays at Jacobs Field over the weekend and are playing great baseball just in time for a pre All Star Break Showdown in Mowtown (has anyone used that slogan before? If not, we call dibs). Surprising youngster Fausto Carmona had a great outing, striking out eight in six innings to pick up his ninth win of the season. Grady Sizemore hit his second career grand slam in the laugher. The Tribe currently leads the Tigers by two games.

Player of the day: Damian Miller, Brewers. Having not played since hitting a walk-off homer last Wednesday, Miller picked up where he left off by going 4-5 with two HR (including a grand slam) and 7 RBI’s against the Pirates. Hey (manager) Ned Yost, you might not want to start this guy just once every five days.

Categories
MLB General

June 22 2007 MLB Power Rankings Roundup

It’s all about the Angels as Casey Kotchman leads them into the top spot in 3 out of the 6 sites we poll. If they can put together some wins in the next week, they will might sway the vote and take over first place by themselves. The Yankees also made some moves in a few polls but after being swept by the Rockies, expect them to fall a little next week.

Here are your MLB Power Rankings for this week:

Rank Sportscolumn ESPN FoxSports Sportsline USA Today TSN.ca
1 Angels Angels Red Sox Angels Red Sox Red Sox
2 Red Sox Padres Angels Red Sox Angels Angels
3 Indians Red Sox Padres Tigers Indians Padres
4 Tigers Tigers Indians Indians Padres Mets
5 Padres Indians Tigers Yankees Tigers Yankees
6 D’backs A’s A’s A’s Mets Tigers
7 Dodgers Dodgers Mets Padres Dodgers Dodgers
8 Mets Mariners Yankees Brewers D’backs Indians
9 A’s Mets Dodgers Dodgers A’s A’s
10 Braves Yankees D’backs D’backs Yankees Braves
11-30 more more more more more more

Categories
All Other Sports

Somehow we missed Pillow Fight 1 through 10

You know it’s an awfully slow sports day week around here when the Pillow Fight League starts looking interesting. Here’s the pitch: get a bunch of “athletic women 19-35! With Style! Stamina! The Eye of the Tiger! Commitment! Work well in a group!” and give em a pillow, some skimpy outfits, and watch dudes pour in. But after checking the profiles, they might need to do some better recruiting.

Pillow Fight 11 is taking place tomorrow in Toronto. Hopefully we’ll end up with some video like the one below on Youtube where there will be such gems as “it’s not about holding your pillow, it’s about using it!”

Categories
Seattle Seahawks

Rick Tuten don’t know nothing about nothing


Rick Tuten played for 12 years in the NFL. Granted, he was a punter but he still made a pretty decent living for a dozen years. But apparently it wasn’t enough — Tuten was arrested for selling stolen goods. Police started investigating Tuten when they realized that he was named by a lot of burglars as the guy who they sold stuff to so they set up a sting.


During a taped telephone conversation, a police informant told Tuten she had two stolen flat screen televisions valued at $1,500.

According to an affidavit, Tuten replied, “I don’t know nothing about nothing.” He then instructed the woman to deliver the items to his home. Tuten paid the woman $600 for the televisions and then asked her to deliver more.

How is it possible that OJ Simpson gets to play golf every day on his NFL pension but Rick Tuten has to sell stolen goods to make ends meet? We don’t get the NFLPA.

Links:
[AOL Sports]: Ex-Punter Arrested for Selling Stolen Goods

Categories
Miami Dolphins

The NFL is screwing Dolphins fans


It’s bad enough that the Dolphins have a “home” game against the NY Giants in London, now the NFL is treating it like some sold out secret Prince concert and telling Dolphins fans that if they buy tickets to the game in London, they have to pick them up themselves.

So let’s say that you buy your tickets for the London game and have an unavoidable scheduling conflict (like one of your idiot friends schedules a wedding that weekend), you couldn’t resell your tickets, even at face value. We understand that the NFL is trying to curb scalping but considering that a lot of NFL teams have a “marketing agreement” with ticket resellers, this seems awfully hypocritical. The NFL can profit all they want, but you cannot.

By the way, notice that this was a home game for the Dolphins but not the Giants. God forbid the NFL takes away a home game from the Giants. At least they were making it a little more even, they usually just try to give the Giants extra home games.

Links:

[sun Sentinel]: NFL doesn’t want Dolphins fans re-selling London game tickets

Categories
All Other Sports

People need to stop inventing new sports

If you thought badminton was lame, there’s an even lamer sport built on top of it. Meet blackmington — it’s like speedminton, which is based on badminton, tennis and squash.

Blackminton is like speedminton but played in the dark with neon paint and black lighting. And… uhhh… it’s huge in France.

The NFL better watch out.

Links:

[Toronto star]: Badminton at night, on steroids

Categories
Sacramento Kings

Reggie Theus is the Prodigal King

The Kings are bringing home one of their own by hiring Reggie Theus as their new head coach. Reggie played 13 seasons in the NBA and 3 with the Sacramento Kings. This isn’t like Reggie Miller going back to coach the Pacers but he has some connection with the club.

The Kings co-owner Gavin Maloof might have been a little too over-enthusiastic in their press release announcing the hiring of Theus though:


He’s the King of Kings. He had a great career as a player with this franchise and now he has a chance to be the head coach of the team. He did a wonderful job with the New Mexico State program. He’s very well thought of and revered in Las Cruces and we’re just really excited to have him on board.

Coach Bill Fuller is now Jesus Christ? How’d that happen? Let’s hope he assembles a better team than this sorry squad.

Links:
[NBA.com]: KINGS AND REGGIE THEUS REACH A COACHING AGREEMENT

Categories
Tennessee Titans

When keeping it real goes wrong: Pacman Jones


You know what, Pacman? It’s ok to not keep it real if you got millions and lifelong security at stake. Either that or you can be the fastest guy on the Wal-Mart flag football team.

On Monday, we told you about the latest incident with strippers and guns. Well, more details are coming out and it just seems like Pacman Jones is an idiot who cares more about his thug image than he does getting back in the league.


According to the police report, Jones became angry after another patron at Club Blaze asked an entertainer for a dance and told the man, “I’ll kill all y’all in here.”

An off-duty cop working as a security guard at the club also told police he overheard Jones say, “I’m going to get my gun” as the Titans’ star left the club.

Pacman is like a bad imitation of the guy in White Men Can’t Jump who threatened to get his gun and kill everyone after Wesley and Woody snookered him. He absolutely just doesn’t care whether he’s back in the league or not. Can Goodell ban him from the NFL while on his suspension for this season?

Think about this for a second: Chris Henry got the same memo and Pacman Jones and he hasn’t been in trouble yet. How sad is it when Chris Henry is smarter than you?

Links:
[NY Daily News]: NFL wants Pacman facts