Categories
Green Bay Packers

Odds and Ends: Brett’s back, baby!

Adolf Hitler might be a true blue Cowboys fan, but he’s just as sick of the Brett Favre drama as the rest of us.

In other news…

[YardBarker.com]: Can you name the entire 1992 Dream Team? You got two minutes. Go!

[Red Sox Monster]: “Defrost Ted” tee hits the shelves

[SI.com]: Cancel your order for a No. 23 Olympiakos jersey

[SignOnSanDiego.com]: Please, please, please don’t take our drunk athletes away!

[Rear Naked News]: Quinton Jackson’s life continues to spiral out of control

[Awful Announcing]: Art Monk finally gets his props

[Home Run Derby]: What you talking `bout, umpire?!

[Boston.com]: Paul Pierce gets bracelets to match his new ring

[Epic Carnival]: Bobblehead makers are truly the lowest form of artist

[Uncoached]: Which Sweet Lou face is your favorite?

[The Ghosts of Wayne Fontes]: Awwww, man; we’re Stephen A. Smith!

[CollegeOTR.com]: College can be a career killer

[SamePageSports.com]: If you said Coach K is the cheesiest person alive then give yourself a pat on the back

[Cousins of Ron Mexico]: “The 2008 Bejing Ol-Chimp-ics.” Thank goodness we’re not the only ones who don’t use spell-check

And finally, another classic video of a cheerleader getting trampled by the football team.

Categories
Seattle Mariners

Odds and Ends: Ichiro goes bananas

Ever since we heard about Ichiro Suzuki’s out of character behavior every year at the All-Star Game, we thought something about the story sounded a little fishy. Well, we were right. As it turns out, Ichiro was accidentally exposed to the blast of a test detonation of a gamma bomb as a child. The effects were startling, making him a baseball machine, but also creating an emotional and impulsive alter ego. When anger or frustration set in, the transformation occurs. So, please, whenever around Ichiro, don’t make him angry. You wouldn’t like him when he’s angry.

In other news…

[D.C. Sports Bog]: Colt Brennan is a system QB…and a dork

[FoodCourtLunch.com]: Super Bowl halftime performer odds are released

[Kissing Suzy Kolber]: `Joe Simpson’s Daughter Touching Company’ and other snazzy fantasy football team names

[IntentionalFoul.com]: LeBron says the USA is as good as gold

[Chicago Bull]: Would you want to wrestle a Long Wang?

[eTrueSports.com]: “Brett, who is this Purple People Eater that keeps texting you?”

[Sportaphile.com]: Wow, has it really been 25 years and day since this…

[Bugs & Cranks]: We thought it was just passion, but cocaine is much more reasonable

[SimonOnSports.com]: We did much better on the “What Bra Size Do I Wear? Erin Andrews Edition”

[Fanhouses Boxing]: Wait, we missed the World Chess Boxing Championships again?!?

[The Zone Blitz]: A tour of Pac-10 stadiums, Google Earth style

[Mr. Irrelevant]: Redskins bust out the big balls to practice for upcoming Wipeout tryouts

[The Big Lead]: Last night’s minor league baseball rumble from a fan’s POV

[ABC News]: Ricky Williams is all over this article

[Blue Monkey Disco Party]: Bet you don’t have these cards in your collection

[Our of Right Field]: Remember this guy?

[Metacafe.com]: Some call it a prank, we call it a GREAT day

And finally, dude, use your star power!

Categories
MLB General

Odds and Ends: "Babe, I don’t know why he doesn’t hit the ball harder"

For the guys who are in a relationship, sports are usually a safe haven where the girlfriends rarely step foot. However, certain events like all-star games, the Super Bowl and March Madness bring out the inner sports fan within chicks and last night’s Home Run Derby certainly constitutes as such an event. So, for those of you lucky enough to actually trick a girl into dating you, here’s a list of things you probably heard while Josh Hamilton was going bananas.

“Look how slow they’re throwing the ball! This is SOOOOOO easy. You’d have to suck not to hit a home run every time.”

“That Berkman guy will definitely win, right? Don’t fat guys always win?”

“Were you joking when you said A-Rod isn’t participating because he’s spotting Madonna at the gym?”

“Why don’t they use the net in front of the pitcher in real games? Wouldn’t that be a lot safer?”

“Omigod. Look at all those guidos in the stands. As much as I love shopping in New York I am SOOO glad we don’t live there.”

“You haven’t switched over to E! once like you said you would.”

“Why don’t players just hit home runs every time? Wouldn’t that be a lot easier?”

“His last name isn’t really Uggla is it? I wouldn’t take your last name if it was Uggla.”

“So you’re really telling me you couldn’t do this? I thought you said you were good at sports.”

“Were you saying Hamilton `loves the coke’ or `loved the coke’?”

“Where’s Jeter? I thought you said he’d be there.”

“There’s another round?! Why? Enough people aren’t asleep?!”

In other news…

[Deuce of Davenport]: Now this is what we call a proper pregame warm-up

[RawSportsBlog.com]: The top 30 reasons to watch professional wrestling

[Undrafted Free Agent]: Mmmmm, the most memorable MLB manager meltdowns

[RyanSpoon.com]: The NFL is worth a whole lotta chedda

[Cleveland.com]: BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! Tractor Traylor is attempting to back his way into the NBA

[Bugs & Cranks]: The MLB is stuffed full of Dicks

[With Leather]: Josh Hamilton sends em back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back (we could be here a while), back, back, back, back…

[Docksquad Sports]: LeBron James gets groovy for charity

[YepYep]: Sorry BMXers and skateboarders, but you just lost use of the term “extreme” because of these guys

[YouTube]: The only good reason to watch a loser bounce quarters into a glass

And finally, the exact opposite of Heelys.

Categories
Cleveland Cavaliers

College kids dethrone King James and CP3 during pickup games

If you thought that Baron Davis heading to the Clippers or Elton Brand bolting from the same squad was shocking then just wait until you hear the latest news involving two of the league’s brightest superstars. On Monday night, LeBron James stopped by his hometown of Akron, Ohio with his buddy Chris Paul by his side and together they conducted the second annual LeBron James Skills Academy. The bombshell wasn’t that James and Paul showed up, although that caused a bit of a ruckus at the gym; no, the real eye-opener was that the duo damn near got run off the court during their stay.

The five-man team led by James and Paul lost.

Three times, in fact.

Swear to LeBron, a team featuring Paul and James — plus Cavs rookie Darnell Jackson — won four games and lost three, and this does not bode well for our Olympic dreams, I don’t think. Furthermore, if this is the result when James plays with other great players perhaps Cleveland general manager Danny Ferry is doing the right thing by surrounding his star with garbage, but that’s another column for another day.

Anyway, the group that gave Team James-Paul the most trouble was comprised of Jonny Flynn (Syracuse), Patrick Beverley (Arkansas), Patrick Christopher (California), Terrence Williams (Louisville) and Jarvis Varnado (Mississippi State). They went 2-2 against Team James-Paul and created memories they seemed to cherish immediately.

Yup, whooping the King at his own event is probably something that’s going to stick with these kids. We’re just wondering if LBJ had to score 29 of his team’s last 30 points in order to secure the series.

Links:

[Sports Crackle Pop]: Lebron James and Chris Paul play hoops with campers and….LOSE
[Sportsline.com]: LeBron, Paul provide unforgettable scene, stirring memories

Categories
All Other Sports

Odds and Ends: Aliens spotted at Wimbledon

If you watched the instant classic between Roger Federer and Rafael Nadal on the Wimbledon grass then you know all about the celebrities in attendance. Well, you at least know that Gavin Rossdale and Gwen Stefani were there because the cameras showed the power couple at least once every ten minutes. However, you might have been too star struck to notice the “others” who showed up to the matches.

With the blankest of blank expressions on their faces, these mysterious figures have been popping up in the most unlikely of places.

The faceless mutants have a penchant for A-list celebrity bashes and have been spotted at Elton John’s White tie ball and Harrods summer sale, opened by Sex and the City star Kim Cattrall.

With a membrane of skin stretched tightly over their eyes, noses and mouths, the alien-like figures were most recently snapped ‘watching’ a match perched on Murray Mount at Wimbledon.

Oh, those were aliens!? We thought those faceless freaks were this dude and Joan Rivers.

In other news…

[EBSports.net]: Batter, and penis, up!

[The World of Isaac]: God bless, America and God bless, American flag bikinis

[Cuzoogle.com]: Troy Tulowitzki joins an elite club

[The Caveman Network]: Rampage whooped by UFC’s new light-heavyweight champion Forrest Griffin

[The Sports Muffin]: The American League’s flubs and snubs

[FilteringCraig.com]: The Nets aren’t the only club looking to sign LeBron James

[The Big Lead]: Epic, epic, epic Wimbledon final on Sunday

[SportsAgentBlog.com]: It’s all about the mo-ney!

[The Sports Hernia Blog]: MLB unveils the new logo for Tampa Bay

[CalBearsShop.com]: The Golden Bears football team gets a new wardrobe

And finally, freestyle swinging.

Categories
Olympics

Hey, Beijing, are you ready for these guys?!

Team USA is still looking for that perfect combination of mad skillz and selflessness from the NBA’s best ballers in attempt to erase years of frustration at the hands of its international competition. When the team travels to Beijing in a little over a month, they might be sporting the best roster they’ve had since the first or second “Dream Team” (although we all know that there is really only ONE Dream Team, the original Dream Team). On Monday, the official announcement was wade and here’s the 12 guy’s expected to resurrect the ghosts of Summer Olympics past.

Carmelo Anthony, Denver Nuggets
Carlos Boozer, Utah Jazz
Chris Bosh, Toronto Raptors
Kobe Bryant, Los Angeles Lakers
Dwight Howard, Orlando Magic
LeBron James, Cleveland Cavaliers
Jason Kidd, Dallas Mavericks
Chris Paul, New Orleans Hornets
Tayshaun Prince, Detroit Pistons
Michael Redd, Milwaukee Bucks
Dwyane Wade, Miami Heat
Deron Williams, Utah Jazz

There is no doubt the rest of the world has defiantly caught up with America in the b-ball department, but there isn’t a country on the planet able to hang with this group of guards. And just imagine how motivated Bryant will be. The dream of grabbing a ring without the Diesel is over for now, but he can still lead his squad to a gold medal. Not a bad way to cap off a MVP season.

Links:

[ScoresReport.com]: Team USA roster announced

Categories
General Sports

The world’s greatest athlete is not who you think it is


Arguing over who’s better than who in the wide world of sports has been going on for decades. It’s a difficult and often sticky situation because trying to compare athletes from different sports is like comparing apples and oranges. ESPN put together one of the most compelling arguments by assembling the SportsCentury: Top 100 Athletes of the 20th Century, but that was just a bunch of people giving their opinions on the matter.

Why can’t there be a more scientific approach? Well, now there is; thanks to The Wall Street Journal.

The Journal sought to identify the world’s greatest athlete with an approach that, while not completely scientific, took a number of measures into account. A panel of five sports scientists and exercise physiologists was given a list drawn up by the Journal of 79 male athletes. Candidates had to be active in their sport and among the all-time best. (Women will be featured separately in a future article.)

The panel weighed individual performance stats, along with their subjective judgments about the relative difficulty of each sport, to give an overall grade to the athletes. (See “How We Did It” for details.) The judges graded athletes on speed, reflexes, stamina, coordination, as well as power, strength and size. The finalists, they said, exhibited a wide range of athletic skill in highly competitive environments.

There were some surprises. Tiger Woods, a dominant figure in professional sports, didn’t crack the Top 10. Panelists said they didn’t give golfers much weight when assessing overall athletic ability. Michael Phelps, one of the greatest U.S. swimmers of all time, also missed the top tier because, the judges said, swimmers generally don’t perform well out of the water. Such endurance athletes as marathoners and Tour de France cyclists also failed to impress. Too one-dimensional, the panel said.

Based on their findings, here are the Journal’s Top 10:

10. Alex Rodriguez, New York Yankees
9. Ronaldo de Assis Moreira, FC Barcelons
8. Jeremy Wariner, 400-meter sprinter
7. Liu Xiang, 110-meter hurdler
6. Sidney Crosby, Pittsburgh Penguins
5. Roger Federer, tennis
4. LaDanian Tomlinson, San Diego Chargers
3. Floyd Mayweather, boxer
2. LeBron James, Cleveland Cavaliers
1. Roman Sebrie, decathlete

You probably haven’t ever heard of the guy, but it’s hard to argue against someone who can “jump over Shaquille O’Neal,” “throw a 16-pound ball the length of a 53-foot yacht” and “leap over a two-lane highway.” Oh, and he’s run a mile in 4:21.

Links:

[WSJ.com]: The World’s Greatest Athlete?
[WaitingForNextYear.com]: LeBron James: World’s (Second) Greatest Athlete

Categories
San Antonio Spurs

Around the Rim: Stayin’ alive in SA


1. Dynamic duo comes through
The Spurs knew they had to win Game 3 or the curtain on their 2008 season would come down. The defending champs weren’t able to stop Chris Paul, but by containing the rest of the Hornets squad, San Antonio grabbed its first win of the series, 110-99, behind the offensive wizardry of Tony Parker and Manu Ginobili. The Spurs backcourt provided 31 points apiece to offset another tremendous game from the should-be MVP Paul. The Hornets guard was close to yet another 30 and 10 game, finishing with 35 points and nine assists as he torched San Antonio from every possible angle. It was a back and forth contest all night, but the Spurs used and 11-0 run, capped off by a Bruce Bowen trey, to seal the game with 5:57 remaining. Tim Duncan had a big role in the victory as well with 16 points and 13 rebounds, but there’s no doubt who stole the show. Parker and Ginobili became just the third duo in the past 15 seasons to each post 30 points in a playoff game. Dwyane Wade (32 pts) and Damon Jones (30 pts) did it for the Heat in 2005 and ten years earlier, Kenny Smith (32 pts) and Clyde Drexler (30 pts) went off for the Rockets.

2. Shutdown by Beantown

LeBron James is in a serious funk. After missing 16-of-18 shots in Game 1, James had another dreadful shooting performance in Game 2, going 6-for-24 from the field in an 89-73 loss to the Celtics. James finished with 21 points and seven turnovers in the contest. On the other side of the court, Paul Pierce (19 pts) and Ray Allen (16 pts) broke out of their opening game funk, joining Kevin Garnett (13 pts, 12 reb) in double-digits. The Cavs were able to take an early lead despite losing Ben Wallace in the opening minutes after he began experiencing dizziness and had to be taken to the locker room. However, the Cs roared back in the second and third quarters when they combined to outscore Cleveland 53-27. The defense is clicking for Boston in this series and with Allen and Pierce returning to form, so is the offense. Good thing Game 3 is taking place in Cleveland, the Cavs need all the help they can get.

3. Dream team
If you’re wondering what the ultimate fantasy basketball lineup is, wonder no more. The NBA released the players on the All-NBA team and it is a star-studded affair indeed. Led by the only unanimous selection of the first team and current MVP Kobe Bryant, the panel gave its utmost props to Chris Paul, LeBron James, Dwight Howard and Kevin Garnett. Second team honors were issued to Phoenix duo Amare Stoudemire and Steve Nash, as well as Tim Duncan, Deron Williams and Dirk Nowitzki while Yao Ming, Tracy McGrady, Carlos Boozer, Paul Pierce and Manu Ginobili make up the third team. In case you’re wondering, all five first teamers and 10 of the 15 total players are still alive in postseason action.

Thursday’s Player of the Day: Tony Parker vs. New Orleans 41 min, 31 pts (FG: 12-24, 3FG: 0-1, FT: 7-8), 4 reb, 11 ast

Buzzer Beater: Happy birthday Mike D’Antoni. The coach turned 57 years old on Thursday and looks like he might get a giant wad of cash from the Knicks as a gift. New York is poised to offer D’Antoni a five-year deal in the neighborhood of $30 million! D’Antoni has yet to make a decision about his coaching future as he is apparently bouncing between either Chicago or the Big Apple. However, after the Knicks threw down there offer, sources in Phoenix could hear screams of “Yippeee!” and “I’m rich bitch!” emanating from the D’Antoni house.

Categories
LA Lakers

Around the Rim: A tale of two kings


1. The new king of the league
He’s got the rings and now he’s got the trophy. For the first time in his career, Kobe Bryant can officially be called the MVP. It took 12 seasons of patiently waiting for his turn in the spotlight, but Bryant ran away with the award on Tuesday, taking 82 first-place votes for a total of 1,105 points compared to Chris Paul who finished second with 28 first-place votes and 889 total points. Kevin Garnett finished in third while LeBron James came in fourth place. Bryant will receive his trophy tonight before the Lakers host the Jazz in Game 2 of their second round series. There’s no doubting Bryant deserved the award with his 28.3 points, 6.3 rebounds, 5.4 assists and 1.84 steals per game during the regular season, but we’re figuring it was the wins that earned him the trophy. After all, besides winning more games, his numbers are virtually identical to his production over the previous five to eight seasons. If you ask us, there is a distinct bias against young players amongst the MVP voters. It the same bias that kept the award out of Bryant’s hands in the past and kept Paul from winning his first MVP despite posting better numbers than Steve Nash did in either of his two MVP reigns.

2. Knocked off his throne

It wasn’t pretty for King James or his court in Game 1 against the Celtics. LeBron James finished with just 12 points on 2-of-18 shooting as Cleveland lost 76-72 in an ugly, ugly offensive game. Despite grabbing nine rebounds and dishing out nine assists, the game was one of James’ worst ever considering he racked up 10 of the team’s 17 turnovers. LBJ became just the third scoring champion to have two or fewer field goals in a playoff game the same year they won the scoring title. It was that bad. While the grass was greener on the Celtics’ side of the fence, it still wasn’t all that great. Ray Allen went scoreless for the first time since his rookie season and Paul Pierce missed 12 of his 14 attempts, finishing with just four points. Luckily, Kevin Garnett’s 28 points proved to be enough in a tremendously disappointing game for both teams and the fans alike.

3. Mike D’Antoni weighs his options
Chicago might have finally found its next Mike. While Michael Jordan won’t be walking through the arena’s doors anytime soon, Mike D’Antoni very well could be. The current Suns coach appears to be off to the Windy City where he will become the latest person to attempt to make the baby Bulls grow up. Chicago GM John Paxson sounded impressed after a pair of interviews with D’Antoni, but New York is still a possible landing spot. Personally, we think it’s a good move if the Bulls want to put together a European-style, run-n-gun offense, but the defense will never be a priority under D’Antoni. Rick Carlisle would be a much better candidate for turning Chicago around, but it’s sounding more and more like he’ll be heading to Dallas.

Tuesday’s Player of the Day: Kevin Garnett vs. Cleveland 40 min, 28 pts (FG: 13-22, FT: 2-2), 8 reb, 3 ast, 2 stl

Buzzer Beater: From the “Too little, too late” file:

The NBA admitted Chauncey Billups’ 3-pointer at the end of the third quarter of Monday’s Detroit-Orlando playoff game should not have counted, but said referees weren’t allowed to review instant replay to determine that.

League president Joel Litvin also said the disputed shot, which gave Detroit a 78-76 lead in its 100-93 victory, could not have been replayed after the clock malfunction was discovered.

“After reviewing the video of last night’s Pistons-Magic game, we determined that the play that concluded with Chauncey Billups’ 3-point field goal at the end of the third quarter took approximately 5.7 seconds,” Litvin said in a statement. “Because there were only 5.1 seconds remaining in the quarter when the play began, the shot would not have counted had the clock continued to run.”

Categories
Phoenix Suns

Around the Rim: Finally time to smile


1. Suns start climbing out of their hole
It took four games and over a week of playoff basketball, but the Suns finally grabbed their first victory of the postseason. After getting pummeled in Game 3, Phoenix returned the favor on Sunday, spanking San Antonio by 19 points, 105-86, leading the entire contest. Raja Bell scored a game-high 27 points and Boris Diaw was a pair of assists shy of recording a triple-double, posting 20 points, 10 rebounds and eight assists in place of Grant Hill who didn’t play. Amare Stoudemire was off target all game, connecting on only 3-of-11 shots for seven points and Steve Nash recorded a mere four assists, but the Suns were still able to build leads that reached 32 points. Tony Parker was the Spurs biggest scorer, tallying 18 points after posting a playoff career-high of 41 points in Game 3. San Antonio must now wait until Tuesday for another chance to close out the series at home.

2. Last second heartbreak in Washington

The Wizards hung tough for 47 minutes and 44 seconds, but then Delonte West delivered the dagger. With 5.4 seconds left in a tie game, West gave LeBron James a break and hit the game-winning 3-pointer to give Cleveland a 100-97 victory and a 3-1 lead in the series. James was on fire once again, posting 34 points, 12 rebounds and seven assists to go with a blow to the head from DeShawn Stevenson. Stevenson smacked LBJ toward the end of the opening half and it looked like fists would fly between the two momentarily, but cooler heads prevailed. However, Stevenson could be in for some repercussions after the league reviews the flagrant foul. It’s been a physical series thus far and Wednesday’s Game 4 should be no different even if Stevenson can’t suit up.

3. Up and down, up and down
After dropping Game 1 at home and Game 3 in Philly, the Pistons tied up their series against the 76ers by taking a 93-84 win on the road. Tayshaun Prince led Detroit with 23 points, backed by Rasheed Wallace’s 20-point, 10-assist double-double while Richard Hamilton and Chauncey Billups posted 18 points and seven assists apiece. The Pistons struggled against their seventh-seeded opponents again in the first half, but they bounced back after the break, outscoring Philly 34-16 in the third quarter to go from 10 down to eight up. The Sixers finished with six players in double-figures on offense; unfortunately, Thaddeus Young led the squad with a measly 15 points. Andre Iguodala raised his series average to 10.5 points per game by posting 12 on Sunday in yet another pathetic playoff performance.

Sunday’s Player of the Day: LeBron James @ Washington 44 min, 34 pts (FG: 11-25, 3FG: 3-8, FT: 9-14), 12 reb, 7 ast, 2 stl

Buzzer Beater: Dallas desperately needed to win Game 4 against New Orleans to gain some momentum to climb out of a 0-2 hole. No such luck. David West led Nawlins with 24 points and nine rebounds while Peja Stojakovic scored 19 and Chris Paul appeared to actually be human with 16 points, eight assists and seven rebounds in the 97-84 win. The Hornets now have a strangle hold on the series, leading 3-1 with Game 4 coming on Tuesday evening in the Hive. Dallas is spiraling out of control as a franchise quickly. The first home loss to New Orleans since January of 1998 is only the tip of the Mavericks problems. Josh Howard went 3-of-16 from the field after calling half the league potheads and admitting to getting stoned in the offseason. American Airlines Arena was devoid of virtually all fans for over half of the final period. The city is beginning to call for the head of Avery Johnson and the team has quite possibly literally lost their testicles since planning a parade when they went up 2-0 on Miami in the Finals two years ago. Hope you enjoyed it while it lasted Big D because at this rate people will be wearing grocery sacks over their heads to the games once again. Ah, the good ol’ days.