Categories
Phoenix Suns

Top 10 Dumbest in-game Injuries: #7 Kevin Johnson


[Sportscolumn is running down the ten dumbest in-game injuries in sports. Here’s #7.]

The game winning shot is a moment that most players live for but it can be dangerous when a 250+ pound man is looking to give you a celebratory embrace. Phoenix Suns guard Kevin Johnson found out the hard way when he buried a buzzer beating bucket and an animated Charles Barkley rushed over, grabbed Johnson and squeezed him with such force that his shoulder was dislocated. K.J. had his arm in a sling while he watched from the bench in street clothes for the next two weeks. Nowadays Barkley doesn’t get that worked up unless he’s doubling down in a hand of blackjack or someone ate the last cheesesteak.

Back to #8 | Forward to #6

Categories
NFL General

Coors Light tells us what we already know



Tough choice

According to a survey sponsored by Coors Light, 44% of men spend more time on Super Bowl plans than Valentine’s Day plans. Seems reasonable. One you actually enjoy and the other is forced upon you by Hallmark. Here are some other highlights of this survey.

  • 30% would rather their team win the Superbowl than win a date with a supermodel, win a year’s supply of beer or win their fantasy football league for three years in a row. Who the hell needs a year’s supply of beer when you can have bragging rights for years to come when your team wins a Super Bowl? Although the date would the supermodel would be a toss up. She’d have to be really hot though.
  • 83% root for the underdog if their team isn’t in the Super Bowl. We root for the refs not to screw everything up.
  • Football fans rarely get off the couch during the game and when they do it is only to use the restroom (67 percent), get something to eat (55 percent) or get an ice cold beer (35 percent). Well, if you had this Lazy Boy Chair with fridge, you could totally cut down on down time. More if you buy some Depends.
  • 89% of men wish their wives would just shut the hell up during the game. OK, we made this up but we bet you it’s close to true.

Links:
[Business Wire]: New Survey Reveals Men’s Super Bowl Rituals

[Ben Maller]: Survey: Super Bowl bigger than Valentines day for men

Categories
NBA General

Around the Rim: Christie Mania



“Who wears the pants?”

1. Newlyweds Again
After being waived by the Dallas Mavericks in 2005, Doug Christie is hopeful that he will be able to make a return to the NBA soon. Supposedly, Christie would like to rejoin the Raptors, where he spent five years from 1995 to 2000. Of course, he would have to get approval from the old lady. Maybe he could run it by her during the couple’s 12th wedding (no joke – they renew their vows every year), which will occur on July 8. But in the meantime, there are plenty of things to occupy their time. Primarily, themselves. In addition to pitching a second season of their reality TV show, Committed: The Christies, to several networks, the couple now has a self absorbed film which is based on their lives. The Christies Un-Cut, is written, directed, starring and sold by the estrogen pumping Christie and his wife, Jackie, and is available online for $19.95.

2. Can He Rebound?

We have a new leader in the NBA when it comes to rebounding. After holding the leagues best average for almost the entire season to this point, Dwight Howard was surpassed on the list. Not once, but twice. Kevin Garnett and Marcus Camby are now tied for first in the category with both averaging 12.6 per game which is only slightly better than Howard. With a couple low totals in some recent games, Howard’s average is now 12.5. The slide could motivate Howard as he looks to make history this season. At 21, should Howard end the season with the league’s best average he would become the youngest player to ever win the rebounding title.

3. Shooting Guard

The Golden State Warriors just got Stephen Jackson, but they might already be regretting their decision to bring him on board. Based on some probation issues, he must appear in a Michigan courtroom on Friday where he could be incarcerated immediately for 93 days. But because of an incident outside of an Indianapolis strip club when Jackson shot his gun at least five times, there is a possibility that Jackson could be placed in prison for up to five more years. Things have really gone downhill for Jackson since he played an important role in bringing San Antonio their second championship in 2003. Larry Bird must be relieved that Jackson’s not weighing the Pacers down with his problems anymore.

Wednesday’s Player of the Day: Dwyane Wade @ Indiana 46 min, 32 pts (FG: 12-22, 3FG: 1-3, FT: 7-8), 5 reb, 8 ast, 5 stl, 3 blk

Thursday’s Game to Watch: Dallas (35-8) @ Chicago (24-19) The Bulls have only lost six games at home this season but they have been struggling lately, going 5-7 in 2007. There have been lots of trade rumors surrounding Chicago over the past few weeks but Ben Gordon and some other pieces might be too high of a price to pay for Pau Gasol or Kevin Garnett. On the other side of the court, the Mavs recent successes have been well documented and they have no interest in making any major moves. Dallas is on track to having home court advantage throughout the playoffs, especially if they continue stringing together double digit win streaks. Chicago could really use the boost in confidence that would accompany a win over the Mavericks.

Buzzer Beater: It’s not too often that you hear about a professional sports franchise imposing a curfew for their team, but Jerry Sloan doesn’t mind sticking out. This year, Utah players must be in their rooms by midnight when traveling on the road. Sloan said he has never made a team abide to a curfew before but some troublesome preseason behavior involving four players and an exotic dancer changed the coach’s mind. Sloan is old school; he’s not going to put up with immature behavior that tarnishes the franchise’s image. There’s a reason that Karl Malone and John Stockton’s teams never had a bedtime when playing on the road.

Categories
Denver Broncos

Jan 25 in Sports History: Elways finally loses the *


In 1998: 11 years to the day they were beaten by the New York Giants, the Denver Broncos won their first Super Bowl with a thrilling 31-24 victory over the Green Bay Packers in San Diego. The win was quarterback John Elway’s first in four tries. Terrell Davis was named Super Bowl XXXII MVP with 157 yards and a record three rushing touchdowns, despite almost leaving the game in the first half with a severe migraine headache. The game was historic not only for Elway’s and Davis’ feats, but it was the first time an AFC team had won the big one in 13 years. It was also the last game that aired on NBC until this season, as CBS took over coverage for the American Conference starting in 1998. Sports Illustrated called it “the greatest Super Bowl ever,” and they were right (at least up to that point) as the game see-sawed back and forth and was not decided until the final minute.

Green Bay, a heavy favorite to repeat as champs, jumped out to a quick lead. Elway, always known to fold like a cheap tent in these situations, rallied the Broncos, and Davis dominated on the ground. Tied at 24 with under two minutes left, the Broncos were near the goal line. Then Packers’ Coach Mike Holmgren made one of the biggest bonehead moves in Super Bowl history. Instead of ordering a goal line stand, he had his defense “stand down” and let Davis score. The Packers were unable to convert a fourth down on the ensuing drive and the Broncos were champs. Just to make sure his hall of fame career was complete and people would forget his previous tank jobs, Elway led the Broncos to another Super Bowl win the following year.

Categories
Cleveland Browns

Top 10 Dumbest in-game Injuries: #8 Orlando Brown


[Sportscolumn is running down the ten dumbest in-game injuries in sports. Here’s #8.]

In 1999, Cleveland’s Orlando Brown was struck in the right eye with a flag thrown by referee Jeff Triplette. The little yellow flag was weighted down with close to a pound of bb’s and apparently Brown didn’t appreciate the incredible accuracy displayed by Triplette because Brown hulked-up and went berserk, shoving Triplette to the ground which lead to an ejection from the game and suspension from the league. The injury was so severe that Brown was forced to remain sidelined for several years, but he remained busy during the down time as Brown and the NFL alternated suing each other over the incident.

Back to #9 | Forward to #7

Categories
NFL General

Another internet lesson

Yesterday, we showed you video of some dorky kid doing a variety of dunks on his basement nerf hoop set. Today, we bring you another lesson from the internet. Never call a game too early. While it probably happens all the time, rarely does it happen on something like Digg where people can keep surfacing it and reminding you what kind of idiot you are.

From Digg:

Patriots are going to the superbowl!! Peyton Cries – Brady dances midfield

Yea – it is currently 7:47pm and I’m calling it now – Patriots are winning 21-3 and Peyton is crying on the field already after not one but TWO sacks! Patriots are going to the superbowl!!!!

eyeaml337 submitted 2 days ago in American & Canadian

Go ahead and digg the story.

Categories
NBA General

Around the Rim: Getting Punk’d


1. Clown the Crown
King James is nobody’s court jester, but on Sunday LeBron will play the fool as he participates in a celebrity roast. James will be subjected to the ridicule of comedians like Cedric the Entertainer, Paul Rodriguez, Ralphie May and Mo’Nique. Teammate Damon Jones will even get on stage and take a few shots at his team captain. But before the roast, L.B.J. will have to put aside all laughing matters as Cleveland hosts the searing Suns, who put a 19 point hurting on the James gang two weeks ago. Nothing funny about that.

2. O-Factor
Lamar Odom went down with a sprained knee ligament on December 12, but it appears that he could finally be returning to action this Friday. The Lakers have gone 12-9 without Odom as Kobe Bryant has struggled to find his offense at times over the stretch. The semi-emergence of Andrew Bynum could be enhanced by the return of Odom as defenders will be forced to respect the Lakers second best scorer. Obviously, nobody is more important to L.A. then Kobe, but Odom’s versatile style adds a unique dimension to the Lakers game plan. The Lakers won 15 of their first 21 games this year when opposing defenses were faced with the dual threat of Kobe and Lamar.

3. Champion off the Hardwood
Dikembe Mutombo is popping up everywhere these days. His career is experiencing a David Hasselhoff type resurgence of late. In the absence of Yao Ming, Mutombo has been pulling down double digit rebounds on a nightly basis and wagging his index finger with regularity. On Saturday, Mt. Mutombo put up 11 points and 13 rebounds against the Nuggets, and then he flew to the nation’s capital where he sat next to first lady Laura Bush during the president’s State of the Union address on Tuesday. “W” even publicly recognized Mutombo’s efforts with the impoverished in Africa during his speech. The Rockets center recently helped bring a $27 million hospital to his home land. Tonight, Mutombo will go back to work on the court when Houston travels to San Antonio to take on the Spurs. Just another week in the life of Dikembe.

Tuesday’s Player of the Day: Carmelo Anthony @ Seattle 40 min, 34 pts (FG: 12-26, 3FG: 0-3, FT: 10-11), 9 reb, 3 ast, 4 stl

Wednesday’s Game to Watch: Houston (25-16) @ San Antonio (30-13) The Spurs use to be unbeatable at home but their home record has significantly declined this year. The Rockets picked up a win over the Spurs in S.A. back in late December but the silver and black have heated up of late, winning seven of their last nine games. When healthy, Tracy McGrady is one of the elite scorers in the league but he has struggled with back problems this season. However, T-Mac should be rested and ready to go after having three full days since playing in his last game. Bruce Bowen will have his hands full tonight.

Buzzer Beater: Everyone has been waiting on pins and needles for this moment and now its here. The NBA finally announced the league’s All-Star team. No, not those All-Stars; the 2007 Las Vegas All-Star Dance Team. One chick from each city will make the trip to Sin City where they will shake their All-Stars assets for you; the devoted fan. Have your TiVo ready.

Categories
Boxing

Top 10 Dumbest in-game Injuries: #9 Evander Holyfield

[Sportscolumn is running down the ten dumbest in-game injuries in sports. Here’s #9.]

This one is more bizarre than dumb and it might have injured Mike Tyson’s career more than Holyfield but it certainly belongs on this list. Mike Tyson took insanity to a whole other level during a fight with Evander Holyfield on June 28, 1997. In front of a sold out crowd at the MGM Grand Garden Arena in Las Vegas, Iron Mike took a page from the Iron Chef and gruesomely bit the ear of Holyfield. After some commotion, the fight was resumed and in Tyson-esque lunacy he again bites and removes a chunk from the left ear of Holyfield. Bedlam takes over the ring and the chaos quickly spreads into the crowd before moving to the hotel lobby and eventually to the streets outside. Tyson was suspended from boxing and his purse was withheld. Tyson’s life has continued to spiral downward to the point where he is now considering a new career in porn. Ear nibbling is off limits though.

Back to #10 | Forward to #8

Categories
All Other Sports

The sports world’s answer to the Star Wars Kid

Via Deadspin comes this funny yet groan inducing video of a kid practicing his dunks on a mini hoops set in his basement. Here’s a lesson for everyone. Don’t ever ever ever videotape yourself doing ANYTHING. It’ll end up on the internet if it’s embarassing enough.

Categories
Dallas Cowboys

TO says good riddance to Parcells



See ya, Bill!

You know how Bill Parcells went out with class, issuing a statement that he was tired and physically he was tired and thanking all the players and coaches that supported him? Did you really expect the same from TO? Didn’t think so. The ever quotable TO had this to say about the Tuna’s retirement:


I am just hoping his retirement brings promise to what the team has to offer. This past year was a big letdown. On paper we were as good as anybody we played against every week. The end result didn’t show that. Our play was not indicative of what we could have done. What we should have done. Hopefully, the owner will hire a coach to take the team to the next level.

Parcell’s biggest sin?

I was underutilized in the offense. A new coach can be good for the Cowboys. It’s not just me. But my teammates know I could have done more. I wasn’t used as a No. 1 receiver. If you don’t involve a guy, that person is not going to be as productive as he can be. That’s how I felt.

What (good) coach in his right mind is going to take the Cowboys job? Can an incoming coach stipulate that his hiring is contingent on the cutting of Terrell Owens? (By the way folks, that’s our last TO/Parcells story for a while… we promise.)

Links:
[Star-Telegram]: Owens: Parcells’ retirement for the best