College Basketball

Odds and Ends: Coach tells Michael Beasley to go pro, even if it means going to Miami

Reportedly, Kansas State forward Michael Beasley has yet to decide if he is going to turn pro next year or return to the Wildcats for a sophomore season. Now, we’re no rocket scientists, but if you ask us, it’s a done deal that the freshman phenom is headed for the next level. After all, the boosters at K-State can’t compete with the NBA’s moolah and it’s going to be nearly impossible for the Wildcats to hang with Kansas and Texas even if he does return. The solution for Beasley should be elementary: listen to your coach, kid!

If you get an opportunity to make $100 million, how am I going to tell him it’s smart to stay in school?” Martin told The Star on Tuesday. “If somebody offered me $100 million, I’m going. I would totally support his decision (to leave) if he’s going to make $100 million.

In other news…

[]: New Yorkers are already campaigning for LeBron.

[Awful Announcing]: Neil Everett, Stan Verrett, Stan Everett; it’s all the same.

[YouTube]: Top 10 Crazy Goalie Moments All-Time

[]: The NBA is going to honor Dikembe Mutombo’s career tonight even though it’s not over!

[]: Shaq wants to patrol Phoenix’s streets, but basketball keeps interfering.

[]: Shawne Merriman now owns a Mercedes Burnz.

[The Big Lead]: Magic Johnson’s needs to put his shirt back on.

[]: Hair today. Gone tomorrow.

And finally, have you ever wondered what a slap to the kisser looks like in super slow motion? Well, wonder no more.

Houston Rockets

Warm up those vocal chords, it’s time for Dikembe Mutombo impersonations

Doing an impression of Dikembe Mutombo might sound easy enough, but most people end up sounding more like Cookie Monster. Lucky for us, his Rockets brethren have the impression down pat.

Not bad, fellas; not bad. But we’re still kind of partial to the real deal.


[Awful Announcing]: The Rockets Imitate Dikembe Mutombo, Hilarity Ensues

Houston Rockets

No finger-wagging here; welcome back Dik’!

We know Houston is totally bummed about losing Yao Ming for the season, but one good great thing to come out of the injury is Dikembe Mutombo is finally getting some face time again.


[Awful Announcing]: Stan Van Gundy, Jeff Van Gundy, Peanut Brittle!

NBA General

Around the Rim: Getting Punk’d

1. Clown the Crown
King James is nobody’s court jester, but on Sunday LeBron will play the fool as he participates in a celebrity roast. James will be subjected to the ridicule of comedians like Cedric the Entertainer, Paul Rodriguez, Ralphie May and Mo’Nique. Teammate Damon Jones will even get on stage and take a few shots at his team captain. But before the roast, L.B.J. will have to put aside all laughing matters as Cleveland hosts the searing Suns, who put a 19 point hurting on the James gang two weeks ago. Nothing funny about that.

2. O-Factor
Lamar Odom went down with a sprained knee ligament on December 12, but it appears that he could finally be returning to action this Friday. The Lakers have gone 12-9 without Odom as Kobe Bryant has struggled to find his offense at times over the stretch. The semi-emergence of Andrew Bynum could be enhanced by the return of Odom as defenders will be forced to respect the Lakers second best scorer. Obviously, nobody is more important to L.A. then Kobe, but Odom’s versatile style adds a unique dimension to the Lakers game plan. The Lakers won 15 of their first 21 games this year when opposing defenses were faced with the dual threat of Kobe and Lamar.

3. Champion off the Hardwood
Dikembe Mutombo is popping up everywhere these days. His career is experiencing a David Hasselhoff type resurgence of late. In the absence of Yao Ming, Mutombo has been pulling down double digit rebounds on a nightly basis and wagging his index finger with regularity. On Saturday, Mt. Mutombo put up 11 points and 13 rebounds against the Nuggets, and then he flew to the nation’s capital where he sat next to first lady Laura Bush during the president’s State of the Union address on Tuesday. “W” even publicly recognized Mutombo’s efforts with the impoverished in Africa during his speech. The Rockets center recently helped bring a $27 million hospital to his home land. Tonight, Mutombo will go back to work on the court when Houston travels to San Antonio to take on the Spurs. Just another week in the life of Dikembe.

Tuesday’s Player of the Day: Carmelo Anthony @ Seattle 40 min, 34 pts (FG: 12-26, 3FG: 0-3, FT: 10-11), 9 reb, 3 ast, 4 stl

Wednesday’s Game to Watch: Houston (25-16) @ San Antonio (30-13) The Spurs use to be unbeatable at home but their home record has significantly declined this year. The Rockets picked up a win over the Spurs in S.A. back in late December but the silver and black have heated up of late, winning seven of their last nine games. When healthy, Tracy McGrady is one of the elite scorers in the league but he has struggled with back problems this season. However, T-Mac should be rested and ready to go after having three full days since playing in his last game. Bruce Bowen will have his hands full tonight.

Buzzer Beater: Everyone has been waiting on pins and needles for this moment and now its here. The NBA finally announced the league’s All-Star team. No, not those All-Stars; the 2007 Las Vegas All-Star Dance Team. One chick from each city will make the trip to Sin City where they will shake their All-Stars assets for you; the devoted fan. Have your TiVo ready.