Category: Golf

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Golf

Golf just got a little bit more frustrating for the rest of us

Don’t you just hate reading those stories about 100-year-old farts that bowl perfect games or blind guys that absolutely own the local pool hall’s tables? Sometimes it’s enough to just make you want to throw up. Well, hopefully you’re not reading with a full stomach because for some of you golfers out there this is gonna be more than you can handle.

Elizabeth Wang is a greenhorn in the world of golf having picked up a club for the first time only six months ago. However, in that very short amount of time her swing has become a thing of beauty and she has now hit not one, but two hole-in-ones. Oh, and did we mention that Elizabeth is in the second grade and just turned 7-years-old?

And the beauty of this whole thing is that while normal hackers like us are out there busting hump trying to fine tune our mechanics, this little girl is writing down ones in her free time between learning basic grammar and watching reruns of Blue’s Clues.

I want to be a surgeon and a professional golfer. Like when I’m at (my) lunch hour I can go golfing … and sometimes when I’m off work then I can go golfing too.

Michelle Wie should feel pretty darn lucky that Elizabeth is going to be really busy with her whole surgeon career choice and all, or else she could start losing some of that seriously ridiculous endorsement money to this kid real soon.

And to put the cherry on top of the sundae; there was no way we could talk about a hole-in-one without reliving one of the greatest moments in the history of golf, where sometimes it’s better to be lucky than good.

Links:

[9News.com]: 7 year old girl already has two hole-in-ones

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Golf

Odds and Ends: OK, enough with John Daly already


John Daly continues to dominate the ‘news that isn’t good enough to write a full entry about.’ Today, John and Sherrie Daly have decided to call a truce in their ongoing spat about who assaulted whom. They have both decided to not press any criminal charges against the other, which just means they wasted a bunch of taxpayer money filing charges with the police and the courts. And we’ve wasted your time covering it.

So no more John Daly stories, folks, unless he actually wins a game or goes O.J. Speaking of which, it’s OJ’s anniversary!

In other news…

[USA Today]: 25 Greatest Sports Stories of the Last 25 Years

[Reuters]: Thai woman set free after winning WBC light-flyweight title

[James Mirtle]: NHL players by nationality… guess by race isn’t much of a chart

[Indystar]: Screw the fans – Colts get their Super Bowl rings tonight in a private ceremony

[Chicago Tribune]: Ditka is surly as hell

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Golf

Nut shots! Get your nut shots here!

We’re just like anyone else; we absolutely love when dudes get nailed in the package. And advertising agencies across the globe are really starting to cash in on this fact. The other day we showed you a Rolling Rock commercial in which an entire ballpark of crotches got smashed by one vindictive ball. We were more than satisfied to have that clip in our back pocket for whenever we got the itchin’ for a juvenile chuckle, but we’re really in heaven now that we’ve stumbled across this nut smashing good ad.

But as funny as those commercials are to us, nothing beats the real thing. You just can’t imitate the sudden rush of pain that comes with a real live racking. Especially when the racking is robotic!

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Golf

Odds and Ends: Now John Daly’s wife accuses him of assault


Man, it’s a regular soap opera at the Daly household. A couple of days after John accused her of attacking him with a steak knife, Sherrie Daly is now claiming that he was drunk off his ass (must have been filming another Maxfli ad) and attacked her and scratched himself to cover it up.

John denied her account of the story but said he was not planning on filing criminal charges. The scratch marks on his face are a little too conveniently placed. We need a CSI: Golf Channel to solve this one.

In other news…

[Indystar]: A massage therapist is suing Nike because of their reps beat his ass

[Sign On San Diego]: Victoria Beckham will do anything for publicity

[Fox]: The Orlando Magic offer to refund season tickets sold after Billy Donovan was hired

[Baltimore Sun]: Ethics trial begins for Duke lacrosse prosecutor

[Yahoo]: Jamaican police say Pakistan’s cricket coach died of natural causes, not strangulation

[10,000 Takes]: Most Overrated Things In Minnesota Sports

[Rivalfish]: Sports logos and their celebrity lookalikes

[Our Book of Scrap]: Throw The Bonds 756 Ball Back?

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Golf

Odds and Ends: John Daly’s wife is insane


John Daly’s wife Sherrie decided to celebrate the 6th anniversary of their meeting by assaulting him with a steak knife and clawing up his face. Big John showed up Saturday with a scratched up face. According to the sheriff’s department, he called them to report an assault by his wife on Friday night. The couple met six years ago at the St. Jude Classic and married 53 days later. Unfortunately for John, in redneck circles, the 7th anniversary is known as the “chainsaw anniversary”. Watch out big guy.

In other news…

[USA Today]: Nugget DerMarr Johnson tasered outside nightclub

[Chron.com]: Nugget JR Smith injured in SUV accident

[KOAA]: Two Trinidad men are accused of murder after arm wrestling match

[AJC]: Georgia Bulldogs football: running a tight ship since… never

[Sports By Brooks]: He’s an actor so maybe he can act like she doesn’t look like a man

[TrojanWire]: Who the hell is Charlie Weisu?

[James Mirtle]: Probably best not to read this article if you don’t like Gary Bettman

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Golf

Rob Lowe manages to desecrate Iowa while getting in 18 holes

You might know Rob Lowe as Sam Seaborn on The West Wing but we still remember him as an obnoxious and annoying member of the 80’s Hollywood version of the Super Friends. So, we were glad to see that Lowe still has his dead on ability to ruin lives, but this time it wasn’t a 16-year-old girl. And it wasn’t caught on tape. Hell, it wasn’t even human.

Sodapop was participating in the Principal Charity Classic Pro-Am in West Des Moines, Iowa on Wednesday when he gripped it, ripped it and killed the state bird. Lowe was playing the fourth hole when his approach shot smacked the bird.

As the rest of the players in his group broke out in laughter and applause, Lowe raised his arms in mock celebration.

“That’s my birdie,” he said after looking at the bird, which lay motionless on the ground.

“That’s unbelievable. Who comes here and kills the state bird? Only me.

Where are all those overly sympathetic Barbaro fans now? Surely, some nut is going to send Lowe some hate mail over his “birdie.” All we know is that if he’s going to have to face heat for pelting the goldfinch, hopefully he at least got his money’s worth. You know, something like this:

Links:

[BostonHerald.com]: Rob Lowe’s golf ball hits state bird in mid-flight

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Golf

Annika vs. Michelle: Let’s get it on!

Despite being a horrendous golfer, Michelle Wie continues to get the hype. But now she’s finally starting to face some harsh criticism as well. Especially after a suspicious wrist injury forced her to withdraw from the Ginn Tribute as she came perilously close to breaking 88; had she broke the magic number it would have prevented her from playing for the remainder of the year. Oh, but that wrist was good enough to smack some balls over the weekend at Bulle Rock.

So, it starts with the fibbing of an injury here and there and before you know it we’ve got the next Lindsay Lohan on our hands. But before we look too far into the future, we want to focus on the present because Annika Sorenstam just put a verbal smack down on the teenybopper.

I just feel that there’s a little bit of lack of respect and class just to leave a tournament like that and then come out and practice here,” said Sorenstam, who soldiered on for four days despite returning from a back and neck injury.

“It’s a little funny that you pull out with an injury and then you start grinding. My doctor told me to rest.

Ohhhh, burn! What you got to say about that Wie?

I’m going through a hard time,” she said. “It’s my first time facing an injury.”

Asked about Sorenstam’s criticism, Wie said nothing was said to her and she had nothing to say back.

“I don’t think I need to apologize for anything,” she said. “I just have to take care of my body and move forward and only think of positive things.

You know what this means, right? Cat fight!!!!!!!!

Links:

[MSNBC.com]: Wie, no longer prodigy, faces harsh criticism
[Golf World]: Tension Convention

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Golf

The 2007 50 Highest Paid American Athletes



Still good to be Tiger

SI has released their list of the top U.S. money earners for 2007. Of course, Tiger Woods is #1 with his $100M in endorsement money and the regular cast of characters fill out the top 10 (Shaq, Kobe, Mickelson, A-Rod, etc.) but it’s really the middle of the list that is the most interesting.

We spotted two types of athletes in addition to the genuine superstars. First, you have the washed up former superstar that is making a ton of cash on their contracts (thank you stupid GMs!) and practically nothing in endorsements. These are mostly NBA players (Michael Finley, Jalen Rose, Eddie Jones, Steve Fraacis, Grant Hill) but also includes useless baseball player Jason Giambi.

The second anomaly is the overhyped athlete that hasn’t done a damn thing but manages to get into this list by virtue of the great hype machine. Well… it’s just one person actually — Michelle Wie. With only $700k in earnings, she manages to come in at #22 with $19.5M in endorsements. What a joke.

The full list of the Top 50 earning American athletes in 2007 after the jump.

Continue reading “The 2007 50 Highest Paid American Athletes”

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Golf

"Warning. Beware of aggressive otters"



Little bastard isn’t so cute when he’s
biting your leg and chasing you down
the street.

Don’t you just hate when you go to the local course for a relaxing 18 holes but your peaceful afternoon is destroyed by the golfer’s natural enemies of wind, water, sand and otters? Wait…otters? Yup, but not just any otters; we’re talking rabid otters!

Some crazy-ass otter at the Grand Harbor’s Harbor Course in Indian River County Florida went wild a few weeks back and bit three people in one day, forcing all of them to endure the dreaded series of injections to prevent the contagious disease. But this was no simple bite and release for our foamy mouthed critter; this otter was on a mission to infect human blood as it chased a pair of golfers off the course and down the street.

(Lani) Becker said the animal chased her at least 100 yards, onto a neighbor’s porch. No one answered the door and the otter continued to attack until she winged it with a doormat.

“I was terrified,” Becker said. “I had been bit and it just kept coming. You have a creature that’s crazy, chasing you. There’s very little you can do.”

(Anita) Stafford said Wednesday she has one more shot to go in a series of vaccines to prevent her from getting the disease.

“There’s a pond on that hole — it’s a short par 3,” Stafford said. “(The otter) was on the grass. He or she was just staring at me.

“All of a sudden he charged me and bit my ankle,” she said. “There are three punctures.”

Stafford’s golf partner, Max Hughes, was some distance behind her on the men’s tee.

“Max caught up — of course, he had a golf club,” Stafford said. “He was swinging the club at the otter.”

The animal chased them until they crossed a street, Stafford said. The couple then drove to Indian River Medical Center, where Becker already was being treated.

“He broke the skin in 12 different places,” Becker said. “The four big bites that I had all would have required stitches.

And you thought that all you had to worry about was the speed of the greens and the price of the beers when you went golfing. Now maybe you won’t laugh next time you pass the “Otter-Be-Gone” as you head out of the local pro shop.

Links:

[TCPalm]: Three bitten by rabid otter spotted on golf course in Indian River County

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Golf

Day trader wins first World Series of Golf tourney



We going Sizzler!

A few months ago, we told you about the World Series of Golf, which combines golf with no limit poker style gambling on each hole. Well, the inaugural WSOG took place over the weekend and it was won by Mark Ewing, a 31-year-old day trader who quit his job two months ago to “take some risks in life.”

Ewing is only a 10-handicap but he managed to come up big at the end and make timely bets. Playing like a poker pro (and beating Phil Ivey), he forced his opponents to go all-in on the final hole 16th and made putt to secure first place and $250,000 in prize money. He will split the prize with two friends who each paid 1/3 of the entry fee. They planned on putting $40,000 of their prize money on one hand of blackjack. Charles Barkley would be proud.

Considering the popularity of poker, this type of betting seems to be a lot of fun. But it’d be a little difficult to keep track of during your weekly Sunday outing. Playing a round on the weekends is slow enough as it is, can you imagine having to deal with four jackasses in front of you trying to figure out chip leads and all-ins? Let’s hope this stays a TV sports.

Links:

[MSNBC]: Day trader wins World Series of Golf in Las Vegas