general-sports
The other day we told you told you about a moron who is tattooing his head to replicate a New England Patriots football helmet. Well, we decided to tag along with our overly obsessed superfan to the doctor in an effort to find out what diagnosis might cause someone to act so irrationally. Turns out, he’s not a just a dumbass like we expected; he’s an asshole.
Will Ferrell is a very revealing guy and we’re not just talking about his the tiny short shorts he wears in his new flick Semi-Pro. For instance, did you know he has some sick post moves, he sweats a lot and Glenn “Big Baby” Davis patterns his game after Mr. Ferrell? See, you actually can learn something from the morons on ESPN.
The Oscars dominated the television landscape last night and to be quite honest, we were totally disappointed. Sure, No Country for Old Men and There Will Be Blood are decent flicks, but not even the “great” Daniel Day-Lewis can compete with the acting prowess of our favorite leading roles in the category of Best Sports Picture:
1) Michael Vick’s 101 Dead Dalmatians;
2) The Graduate: An inspirational masterpiece about the lone basketball player who got his degree under Bob Huggins;
3) The Way We Were: Barry Bonds and Roger Clemens reflect on their lives before their heads grew into pumpkins;
4) Sacks, Lies and Videotape: The Bill BeliCheat Story;
5) Apocalypse Now: What will happen if the Tampa Bay Rays ever finish with a winning record.
Links:
[SignOnSanDiego.com]: These movies deserve some Oscar consideration
Everybody is up in arms these days about steroids in professional sports, especially baseball. Now, we’re not condoning the use of illegal substances, but, in our opinion, it has gotten to a point where removing steroids and growth hormones and bull sperm or whatever else they use would actually be a disservice to the game. Just look at what happened to this L.A. Dodger after he gave up the juice.
Now, is that really so much better than guys looking like Shrek while jacking homers and throwing no-hitters?
Welcome to another episode of Poor Man’s PTI.
You can download this week’s podcast directly (running time 75 mins) or subscribe to the feed.
If you use iTunes, just click here and then click subscribe and iTunes will take care of the rest.
This week’s topics include:
Hope you guys enjoy the podcast. If you did enjoy it, please give us a good rating below so we can rise up in the rankings. If you didn’t, send us an email ([email protected]) and give us some suggestions. Thanks for listening.
The latest cast of Dancing With the Stars was announced on Monday and, as usual, there were some sports figures gracing the list; most notable was Miami Dolphins defensive end Jason Taylor. While we’d love to crack on Ja-Tay for learning the samba and salsa, there’s not much you can say to humiliate a guy who just spent a season sweating for one of the most pathetic teams in NFL history. And considering that his male competition consists of dorks like Penn Jillette, Steve Guttenberg and Adam Carolla, we figure Taylor stands a decent chance. Anyways, if Emmitt can do it, anybody has a realistic shot.
Oh, but the fun doesn’t end there. Some female sports stars also made the cut.
Kristi Yamaguchi and Monica Seles will be cutting rugs as well. Let’s just hope that DWS provides tighter security than those knuckleheads in Hamburg.
Links:
[AssociatedContent.com]: `Dancing with the Stars’ Announces Season 6 Contestants
Without any kids to yell at anymore, Bob Knight just doesn’t seem to know what to do with his time nowadays. In fact, the General is apparently getting so bored sitting around the Knight estate that he decided to try his hand comedy, making an appearance on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno in a referee shirt. Not odd enough for you? What if we told you the cantankerous one is a fan of Larry the Cable Guy.
If it’s taking you a while to adjust to the idea that MLBers on occasion use pink bats, then you might want to watch your college hockey on a black and white television set this weekend. But don’t be alarmed if you come across your favorite team looking oh so pretty in pink because it’s for a good cause: fighting cancer.
And a colorful one at that as Fredonia — 50 miles south of Buffalo — joins most every school across the country by taking part in this weekend’s NCAA-sponsored promotion to raise both money and awareness for the American Cancer Society.
“We might get termed the `Pink Devils’ for the game,” Heffernan said. “But that would be fine by us.
Pink hockey jerseys shouldn’t be anything too shocking. After all, we’ve seen pink bats, pink socks, pink ribbons, pink jerseys, pink shoes and so on and so and so on. But have you ever seen a pink rink? No? Well, you need go no further than Mississauga, Ontario this Wednesday evening to think pink and watch some hard-hitting St. Michael’s Majors hockey.
Links:
[Associated Press]: Fredonia Hockey Pink to Fight Cancer
[OurSportsCentral.com]: Majors Plan to “Paint the Rink Pink”
Maybe it was “Bootgate” or maybe it was Plaxico Burress’ slightly awry (but nevertheless correct) victory prediction. Or maybe it was just because after two weeks of incessant coverage we just couldn’t stomach anymore jibber-jabber from the talking heads on SportsCenter. Any way you slice, we missed out on a sweet catfight between Sean “Shut Up Old Man” Salisbury and John “Crypt Keeper” Clayton.
We normally like Salisbury, but for some reason, he turns into ESPN‘s biggest jackass when sharing the screen with Clayton. Believe it or not Sean, but it is actually possible to be informed and have an opinion about football even if you’ve never stepped foot onto a field. Your history of wearing a jock doesn’t give you any special analytical powers and your school-yard-bully tactics make you look ridiculous.
You might be spot on in this instance, Clayton does look likes he’s been dead for about a decade, but you still look foolish in your approach. Even when side by side with the living Crypt Keeper.
Links:
[The Big Lead]: Salisbury rips Clayton on-air: “Tales from the Crypt”
Shaq is totally confusing us. One minute he’s on the bench with the Heat, the next he’s heading to Phoenix for a physical. And sandwiched in-between the two, Shaq strangely spent some time as a horse jockey. (Poor horse.) Apparently, he didn’t stick with that career endeavor because there was some serious jealousy and hostility going on in the locker room. Turns out the horses aren’t the only ones hung like horses.
