Categories
NBA General

North Korea a problem? Just send in Michael Jordan



The NBA: It’s Dictator-tastic!

We don’t much get into politics here at Sportscolumn but this Union-Tribune story is too good to pass up. Apparently, Kim Jong Il is a tremendous basketball fan who loves the NBA and has a video library of almost every game MJ has ever played.


[In 1001] Jordan’s management team was approached about the athlete making a goodwill trip to Pyongyang to meet Kim. The North Korean government, according to documents obtained by The San Diego Union-Tribune, sent a letter authorizing the request, and Samsung, a South Korean electronics company interested in promoting reunification of the Koreas, had offered to underwrite the venture.

Jordan respectfully declined.

Apparently, because of the closed contact with the outside world, basketball in North Korea is a horse of a different color: “three points for a dunk, four points for a three-pointer that does not touch the rim and eight points for a basket scored in the final three seconds. Miss a free throw, and it’s minus one.” Kim Jong Il must not be much of a Shaq fan.

Links:
[SignOnSanDiego]: The Oddest Fan

Categories
College Football

"That’s kinda… that’s kinda gay"

What would we do without YouTube?

Categories
NHL General

Crashing the Zamboni: Early Movers and Shakers

[Editor’s Note: Welcome to the inaugural “Crashing the Zamboni”, a daily blog by Eric Caterina. Eric will be covering the NHL this year for Sportscolumn.]



Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Lindy.

So we’re just about a month into the NHL season, and already things have begun to take shape. Some teams have stormed out of the gates, firing on all cylinders — while others are still wondering where to find their helmets.

1. Ice Melters

Buffalo Sabres (10-0-1; 1st in Eastern Conference)
Buffalo is an obvious choice here. Sure, they finally suffered a loss, but after breaking a team record and tying an NHL record for most consecutive wins to open a season, they deserve some kudos. Looks like Lindy Ruff’s Sabres are well on their way to avenging last year’s loss in the Conference Finals.
Atlanta Thrashers (8-1-3; 2nd in Eastern Conference)
Call them the Hotlanta Thrashers. Scoring 45 goals in just 12 games (second to aforementioned Buffalo in that stat), the Thrashers are on their way to a stranglehold of the Southeast Conference. They are the only team to beat the Sabres so far this year, downing Buffalo 5-4 on Saturday night.
Minnesota Wild (9-2-0; 2nd in Western Conference)
Living up to their name, this team is going wild in Minnesota. Netminder Manny Fernandez is having a stellar year, only allowing 19 goals in 11 games (he is 8-2 in that span). Maybe the loss of Roloson wasn’t as bad as many people thought after all.
Anaheim Ducks (8-0-3; 1st in Western Conference)
They dropped “Mighty” from the name, but have kept it in their game. All is well right now in Anaheim, and they aren’t showing many signs of slowing up. Still undefeated in regulation play, the Ducks will have to hold on to the top spot in a tough Pacific Division.

2. Stuck in the Freezer
Philadelphia Flyers (2-7-1; Last in Eastern Conference)
Right now, the Philadelphia Flyers are in need of some brotherly love. Philly is off to an atrocious start, and it’s tough to say when things will start to look good again. GM Bob Clarke resigned, coach Ken Hitchcock was fired, and captain Peter Forsberg is fighting the injury bug.
Phoenix Coyotes (3-9-0; Last in Western Conference)
Their slogan this year is “A Decade in the Desert”, but the Phoenix Coyotes are anything but hot. Phoenix has been an ugly franchise seemingly ever since they made the switch to Arizona from Winnipeg. Head coach Wayne Gretzky’s job is in question, and like Forsberg on the Flyers, captain Shane Doan has been battling injuries.
Calgary Flames (3-5-1; 13th in Western Conference)
Even with the mighty Miikka Kiprusoff (try saying that five times fast) between the pipes, the Calgary Flames are struggling. In a bit of a surprise, Calgary is sitting last in the Northwest division, and need to do some work to climb back to the top. With guys like Alex Tanguay and Jerome Iginla, a comeback is not out of the question- but in a division that tough, it won’t be easy.
Boston Bruins (3-5-1; 14th in Eastern Conference)
Beantown is beaten up this year. With an abysmal offense (scoring only 19 goals thus far), Boston is reeling. Thanks to Buffalo, the Bruins have no shot at contending for the Northeast Division title. Looks like Boston just has to sit and wait until the next Bobby Orr comes around, which won’t happen for a long, long time.

Game of the Night: Atlanta @ Toronto

Thrashers look to snap seven game losing streak against Toronto.

The Last Shot
The reason for the Sabres’ early success? Of course, it has to be the new uniforms – ugliest in the league!

Categories
Boxing

Oct 30 in Sports History: The Rumble in the Jungle



Rope-a-dope

In 1974: Muhammed Ali defeated George Foreman to regain the heavyweight-boxing title in Kinshasa, Zaire. Ali knocked out the previously unbeaten in the eighth round of the “Rumble in the Jungle.” Ali, knowing that Foreman would be tough to beat toe to toe, was able to outthink him. He threw very few punches throughout the fight, employing the “rope a dope” method where he let the big-swinging Foreman punch himself into exhaustion, until Ali caught him with a combination of punches to win back the belt. It was the first fight (for better or for worse) that was promoted by Don King, whose original slogan was (and we swear we didn’t make this up) “From the Slave Ship to the Championship.” Each fighter took home $5 million, which was unheard of at the time.

In 1997: Violet Palmer became the first woman to officiate an all-male sports league game when she was a referee for a game between the Dallas Mavericks and Vancouver Grizzlies in Vancouver, British Columbia. Palmer was joined that season by Dee Kantner as the first two female referees in the NBA.

In 2001: Michael Jordan came out of retirement for the second time, this time to suit up for the Washington Wizards in a 93-91 loss to the New York Knicks at Madison Square Garden. Jordan played two more seasons for the Wizards and showed flashes of the old MJ, but the team was unable reach the playoffs.

Categories
New York Giants

Michael Irvin and Tom Jackson respond to Tiki


After being called an idiot for the 5,608,874th time, Michael Irvin has decided to address Tiki Barber’s rant. In the New York Post today, Irvin defended his criticism of Tiki’s retirement announcement.


It kills his ability to lead. He is the leader of that football team. If I am a young guy and we are in a battle and we are banging heads and we are fighting. I’m out there getting hit and being hit and we are in a tough spot in a football game.

If I am in the line of battle and Tiki comes to me and says, ‘Come on, give me what you have!’ I’m going to look at him and say, ‘Aww, shut up. What are you talking about? You are quitting on us.’ This stuff will come out on the sideline.

Tom Jackson, for his part, said, “I thought that the name-calling seemed a bit unnecessary.” You gotta love Tom Jackson. It’s a shame he has to be paired alongside the unbearable Chris Berman.

To a man, the Giants have all said that Tiki’s retirement announcement has not been a distraction. Antonio Pierce said, “There is no quit in that guy. He is still our leader on offense.” And Plaxico Burress said, ” don’t feel it has been a distraction at all. I’m sure everyone can see the way he is playing, the way he is running.” Having Plaxico Burress commenting on anyone quitting is ironic since he’s liable to quit at any point in the season. At least with Tiki, you know you’ll get his all for the rest of this season.

Links:
[NY Post]: TV ‘IDIOTS’ FIRE BACK AT BARBER

Categories
Dallas Cowboys

Cowboys WR coach is suing McDonald’s



Now with more rat!

Todd Haley, who is known mostly for disrespecting and being disrespected by Terrell Owens, is suing McDonald’s for $1.7M because his wife and nanny found a six inch dead rat in their McSalad.

According to the lawsuit, Christine Haley had eaten part of the salad when she found a juvenile roof rat in it with its paws up and mouth open. Both women because violently ill and “endured long-lasting physical injuries”. The suit was filed because the McDonald’s didn’t follow through on their promise “to make things right”. Ummm… how do you make finding a dead rat in your salad right? Free nuggets for your lifetime? Advance notice of when those yummy Shamrock Shakes are coming? Basically, the only thing to “make it right” is money. And well, we guess $1,700,000 is the “right” amount.

Links:
[SI]: Cowboys assistant suing McDonald’s

Categories
All Other Sports

Glucose pills today… Shawne Merriman’s supplements tomorrow



Hey kids, snack time!

A Reading, PA pee wee hockey coach has resigned after acknowledging that he gave his players “performance-enhancing pills”. The pills in question were over-the-counter glucose tablets that boosts energy. Jeff Kantner, of the Reading Junion Royals, said that he gave the 11 and 12-year-olds the tablets to counteract the effects of too much candy. How do you keep kids from coming down off a sugar high? Give em more sugar! Seems brilliant to us.

“Off camera, the youth players told NBC 10 they had no adverse reaction to the pills and they are upset about losing their coach.” Hell, who doesn’t like a coach that hands out sugar pills? Next time Kantner, be smart about it and just hand out some kisses. Hershey’s that is. The other kind would get you in a whole different kind of trouble.

Links:

[NBC10]: Youth Coach Accused Of Giving Pills To Players

Categories
Cleveland Browns

Oct 27 in Sports History: Art Modell steals away in the night



Suckers!

In 1995: It is well known how miserable of a sporting existence Cleveland fans have suffered, but this might have been the lowest point, the cruelest blow, the coup de grace gut punch. Browns’ owner Art Modell signed a secret agreement with the city of Baltimore to move his franchise – which probably had the most loyal fans in the NFL – there for the 1996 season. Modell cried poor and blamed Cleveland officials for refusing to build him a new stadium. He took a sweetheart deal from Baltimore (who was desperate for a franchise after losing the Colts in similar fashion in 1984), the Browns became the Ravens and changed their logo and uniforms, and the Mistake by the Lake was soon a memory (it caught fire during demolition just to remind Cleveland what it really was). Cleveland kept the rights to the Browns nickname and colors and was granted an expansion franchise for the 1999 season. The Ravens won the Super Bowl in 2000 while the Browns have gone 37-81 to this day.

In 2002: Emmitt Smith of the Cowboys took a handoff from Chad Hutchinson and ran off left tackle for 11 yards. They were last of 16,727 yards he needed to break the late Walter Payton’s career rushing total. The game was stopped for five minutes to honor Smith, and a post-game celebration was also held despite the Cowboys losing 17-14 to the Seattle Seahawks. Smith is the NFL’s all-time career rushing leader in yards, attempts and touchdowns.

In 1986 and 1991: A pair of memorable World Series Game 7’s took place: In 1986, the Mets completed their stunning comeback by finishing off the Boston Red Sox 8-5 and continuing the Curse of the Bambino for the 68th consecutive year. In 1991, Jack Morris of the Twins turned in a legendary complete game, 10-inning shutout of the Atlanta Braves and a Gene Larkin bases-loaded single clinched the second World Series in four years for Minnesota.

And no Boston, we didn’t forget that the Red Sox clinched their first championship since 1918 with a four game sweep of the St. Louis Cardinals on this day in 2004.

Categories
General Sports

Vote for November’s Woman We Love

Here are the nominations for November’s Women We Love.

– Eva Green from Casino Royale
– Parker Posey
– Rashida Jones from The Office
– Lauren Harris
– Minka Kelly from Friday Night Lights
– Cheryl Burke from Dancing with the Stars

Vote Now

Categories
General Sports

Oct 26 2006 episode of Poor Man’s PTI

Welcome to another episode of Poor Man’s PTI.

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