Categories
Seattle Seahawks

Odds and Ends: Well, at least one person was having fun at Qwest Field on Sunday



Don’t mess with Al Davis

What to do when your team is getting beaten by the left guard they declined to resign and his new team? Have sex in a bathroom stall of course.

A prosecutor from nearby Thurston County was arrested after two female Qwest stadium employees told security that the man was having sex in a womens bathroom stall with a woman. The man claimed that he was simply going to the bathroom and not having sex… with a paralegal he’s worked with for the last 8 years. Ummm… OK.

In other news…

[Inside Bay Area]: Al Davis threatens to kick reporter’s ass

[AJC.com]: Chad Johnson talks all sorts of trash about “DeAngelo Fall”

[SI]: Tennessee mascot accused of biting Alabama player

[NY Post]: Isiah’s impact: Knicks Season ticket sales down 15%

[Mirror UK]: London will get first NFL regular season away game

[Cincinnati Enquirer]: Big Ben says a Falcon made fun of his motorcycle accident

Categories
New York Giants

Tiki Barber takes Michael Irvin off Christmas card list



idiot

We’ve always kind of liked Tiki Barber. As far as NY players go, he’s the one you least want to kill. So it comes as no surprise that he actually gets it and isn’t afraid to lash out at the retarded media and ESPN.

I will call them ‘idiots’ because they have neither spoken to me nor any one of my teammates or any of my coaches, yet all they do is criticize me for being a distraction with this retirement thing.

That includes [Daily News columnist] Gary Myers, that includes Tom Jackson on ESPN, that includes the ultimate character guy, facetiously speaking, of course, Michael Irvin [of ESPN], please get a clue how to be a journalist. Don’t make blanket assumptions about it.”

Barber then sarcastically wondered whether he looked distracted in helping the Giants beat the Cowboys Monday night.

Did Tiki really have to add “facetiously speaking, of course”? You’d have to be some kind of idiot to think that anyone would call Michael Irvin a character guy and be serious. Well, some kind of idiot or Deion Sanders. In the NFL version of hell, you’d have Deion, Irvin and Sean Salisbury doing the pregame.

Links:
[Newsday]: Tiki calls critis “idiots”

[Newsday]: Irvin: Retirement makes Tiki quitter

Categories
NBA General

David Sterns channels Johnny Cash



Now was that 2nd or
3rd amendment?

Don’t take your guns to town son
Leave your guns at home Stephen Jackson
Don’t take your guns to town

It’s sad when you actually have to remind your players like David Stern did that you shouldn’t be carrying around a gun.


It’s a pretty, I think, widely accepted statistic that if you carry a gun, your chances of being shot by one increase dramatically. We think this is an alarming subject, that although you’ll read players saying how they feel safer with guns, in fact those guns actually make them less safe. And it’s a real issue.

The latest collective bargaining agreement prohibits players from bringing a gun to the arena, a practice facility or a team or league offsite promotional appearance. The fact that is specifically says you shouldn’t bring a gun to a promotional appearance means that perhaps in one of those NBA Cares ads, a player is packing heat while reading Dr. Seuss to a bunch of 3rd graders. Image problem? Nahhh..the NBA doesn’t have an image problem.

Links:
[FoxSports]: Stern wants players to leave guns at home

Categories
MLB General

Oct 26 in Sports History: A couple of game 6 meltdowns


In 1985: While everyone remembers the tremendous gag-job by the 1986 Red Sox in the World Series, the previous Fall Classic featured a similar meltdown. This one, many felt was caused by an umpire, as the name Don Denkinger will forever be cursed on the eastern side of Missouri. With the St. Louis Cardinals leading the I-70 World Series three games to two and holding a Game 6 advantage 1-0 into the bottom of the 9th inning, Royals pinch hitter Jorge Orta tapped a weak grounder to first. Pitcher Danny Cox of the Cards cleanly fielded Jack Clark’s flip and clearly had Orta beat by a step. One problem: first base ump Denkinger was the only person in America who thought Orta was safe. The Cards argued bitterly, became completely unglued in the field as Clark misplayed a popup, catcher Darrell Porter had a passed ball, and Dane Iorg drove home the winning run with a bases loaded single to send the series to a seventh game. There, the Royals promptly smacked the shell-shocked Redbirds 11-0 to win their only championship. Karma rules, though, as they haven’t sniffed October baseball since and now are as formidable a ball team as the Springfield Power Plant softball team (pre-Mr. Burns’ ringers).

In 2002: Speaking of awesome, The-Cosmos-Are-OK, Game 6 meltdowns, who can forget the collapse of the Barry Bonds-Dusty Baker-led San Francisco Douche Giants against the Whatever Angels? The Giants built a 5-0 lead through six innings and a smug Bonds was about to wrap up his coveted, undeserved World Series ring. Funny thing was, the Baseball Gods knew stuff we didn’t at the time, and let the Angels claw their way back with a huge rally and a 6-5 win. Baker (who thought it was such a cute idea to almost get his three-year-old son mauled at home plate as a bat boy), suddenly couldn’t manage a Quick Stop let alone a baseball team, made wrong move after wrong move and the Angels eventually ripped the ring off Bonds’ puffy finger in seven games. Those thundersticks and the Rally Monkey were wicked-stupid, though. Baker quickly bailed on the Giants and went on to an even better punishment with the Cubs the following season, when he was introduced to a nerd-fan named Steve Bartman.

Categories
NBA General

Does this come with Carmen Electra?



Does the winner get a
matching boa?

Always wanted to hang out with a 5 time NBA champion and don’t have enough pull to get invited to play golf with Michael Jordan? Well, you can still play 18 holes with Dennis Rodman. This week on eBay is a charity event auction where the winner and 2 guests will fly to Las Vegas, have dinner with Rodman, and then hit Scores. If you don’t know what Scores is, this auction is not for you.


YOU CAN SPEND THE NIGHT OUT WITH DENNIS RODMAN FOR THE SCORES LAS VEGAS, HALLOWEEN PARTY.

THE NIGHT WILL BE SPENT AT SCORES LAS VEGAS, A GENTELMANS CLUB LOCATED IN THE HEART OF SIN CITY. SCORES IS LAS VEGAS’ ONE STOP SHOP WHERE YOUR FANTASY WILL BECOME REALITY.

A SIT DOWN DINNER WITH DENNIS WILL KICK OFF THE NIGHT AND THEN TO THE VIP SECTION OF SCORES FOR THE DURATION. WILD WOULD NOT GIVE THIS NIGHT ENOUGH CREDIT. PICTURES WILL BE ALLOWED.

Really? Fantasy will become reality? How does spending Halloween at Scores help us punch Merrill Hoge and Stephen A Smith in the face?

Links:
[eBay]: DENNIS RODMAN – A NIGHT OUT WITH DENNIS

Categories
New York Knicks

Odds and Ends: It’s gotta be the shoes



Not enough heel support

When you’re trying to push a $15 shoe that is every bit as good as the $150 being pimped by other players, the last thing you need is to miss a game because of a foot injury, specifically heel inflamation. Of course, Marbury denied it had anything to do with his shoes.

We’re just kidding of course, the $15 shoe for kids is probably the only decent thing Stephon Marbury has ever done in his career.

In other news…

[Fox Sports]: Clijsters bruises tailbone after falling over dog… somewhere Brian Griese is smiling

[NFL Fanhouse]: Edgerrin James has made a huge mistake

[The Offside]: Someone hook this guy up with Dirk Nowitzki

[Can’t Stop the Bleeding]: You think maybe he forgot to tell officials cause he has ADD?

Categories
Miami Heat

Coming to a falsely accused child pornographer’s house near you: Deputy Shaq


Shaq has always had an interest in law enforcement and is actually a Miami Beach reserve officer but his latest foray into kicking perp ass went a little sideways.

The Bedford County (VA) Sheriff’s department confirmed today that Shaq was part of a raid last month on a farm house of a man suspected of being a child pornographer. Shaq is the spokeman for The Safe Surfin’ Foundation which protects kids from online predators. The owner of the farm has filed a formal complaint because he was held at gunpoint, taunted, and his house was ransacked as officers seized computers, cameras, dvds and tapes. However, it turns out that the sheriff’s department had the wrong physical address of the suspect because they were given the wrong IP address by the Internet Service Provider. Oops.

Hey look, at least you can say that Shaq has been in your house. That’s gotta be worth 30 minutes of terror and a false accusation right?

Links:
[Miami Herald]: Deputy Shaq was part of a bungled raid
[ars technica]: Faulty IP address data leads to Shaq attack on innocent family

Categories
NFL General

Woman wins $444,186 on a $5 football bet



Our new picks system

A 21-year-old bartender named Sarah Mabee won the Ontario (that’s Canada) Pro Picks Pools lottery game by picking all 13 games correctly last weekend. Mabee knows nothing about the NFL and it was only her second time playing the lottery game.

So basically what this tells you is that no matter the amount of research you do, it doesn’t beat just throwing a dart at the wall or picking the team with the prettier uniforms/hotter cheerleaders/cooler mascot. Or picking the Oakland Raiders over the Arizona Cardinals because it was her grandfather’s favorite team.

Mabee won enough money to quit her job and we’re still trying to figure out how we picked the Cardinals to beat the Raiders. That’s it, from now on, we’re going with the team with the hotter cheerleaders. That means Pittsburgh and Green Bay will lose every game.

Finally, why isn’t a Pro Picks lottery game available in the US? Isn’t it safer for us to go to the store and put this bet down instead of finding the shady fat guy at the end of the bar?

Links:
[Toronto Star]: Bartender’s NFL picks net $444,186 prize

Categories
Boston Red Sox

Oct 25 in Sports History: Bill Buckner Day!


In 1986: Until 2004, the 20 most hated words in Red Sox Nation: “Little roller up along first
behind the bag! It gets through Buckner! Here comes Knight and the Mets win it!” Buckner was universally blamed for the Red Sox 6-5 defeat in Game 6 of the World Series, but it was a rickety bullpen, two other Red Sox errors, a wild pitch which scored the tying run and horrible managing by John McNamara that led to their demise. The Sox blew leads of 2-0, 3-2 and 5-3 before the Mets won what is probably the most famous World Series game in history. Boston also blew a three run lead in Game 7, as the Mets won their second World Series.

In 1964: In one of our favorite NFL Films clips ever, Minnesota Vikings defensive end Jim Marshall picked up a San Francisco fumble and rumbled 66 yards to the end zone for the score. Problem was, he ran the wrong way. Marshall is a member of the Pro Football Hall of Fame, played 20 seasons without missing a game as an anchor of the famed “Purple People Eaters,” all the while being an average of 20 to 30 pounds smaller than his opponents. But he will mostly be remembered for taking the longest safety in NFL history. As he threw the ball into the stands after he crossed what turned out to be his own goal line, some 49ers players came up and tapped him on the helmet to say thanks. The Vikings did win the game, however, 27-22.

In 1998: Even though – much like Mike Ditka – we don’t recognize kickers as real football players, Jason Elam of the Denver Broncos tied Rick Dempsey’s record by booting a 63-yard field goal in a 37-24 victory over the Jacksonville Jaguars at Mile High Stadium. Only five times in history (including this past Sunday) has a kicker converted a field goal attempt of 60 yards or more.

Categories
All Other Sports

Odds and Ends: The Sport of Kings


Hunt organizers are accused of plying a tame bear with vodka-drench honey so that the King of Spain, Juan Carlos would have an easier time of killing a bear during a recent hunting excursion. Apparently, Russian hunt organizers have done this before as they used to ply animals with booze or tie them to trees so that former Soviet leader Brezhnev could still enjoy hunting even as he got older and his aim got worse.

Now Dick Cheney might shoot his friends in the face but he never had to resort to having hunt organizers ply quail with booze. America! Fuck Yeah!

In other news…

[Slate]: The physics of baseball’s most popular illegal pitches

[High and Tight]: Kenny Rogers no stranger to cheating

[MSNBC]: Backup punter surrenders on attempted murder charge for stabbing first string punter

[Hoops Addict]: Hey! Whatever Happened To John Starks?

[Fanblogs.com]: Ohio State #1 selling “Team Colors” paint

[TrojanWire]: Ivy League Mascot Wars: More Entertaining Than Ivy League Football

[Can’t Stop the Bleeding]: PETA Takes Credit For The NBA’s Much Maligned New Ball