Tag: cheating

Categories
New York Yankees

Odds and Ends: This whole Alex Rodriguez sex scandal could have easily been avoided

Athletes and infidelity go together like peanut butter and jelly or like athletes and hookers. They’re simply made for each other, but that doesn’t mean that the cheating has to become public. According to BlackSportsOnline.com, an athlete doesn’t have to keep it in their pants in order to keep their name out of the paper. Simply following this list of The 10 Bona Fide Commandments For The Cheating Athlete should be more than enough.

I- IF THOU SHALL WIFE HER, THOU BETTER MAKE SURE SHE DOESN’T CARE IF YOU CHEAT.

II- THOU SHALL ALWAYS HAVE A PRENUP.

III- THOU SHALL NOT CARE IF WIFEY CHEATS ON YOU.

IV- THOU SHALL ALWAYS REMEMBER IT IS CHEAPER TO KEEP HER.

V- THOU SHALL NEVER SLEEP WITH ANYONE IN COLORADO NOR ANYONE NAMED KATIE WITH A JOURNALISM DEGREE, EVEN FROM A COMMUNITY COLLEGE.

VI- THOU SHALL NEVER CHEAT WITH AN OBSESSED FAN.

VII- THOU SHALL REMEMBER CONDOMS COST $8 A BOX AS OPPOSED TO 25% OF YOUR GROSS INCOME GOING TO CHILD SUPPORT.

VIII- THOU SHALL REMEMBER THEY ARE STRIPPERS AND PROSTITUTES FOR A REASON.

IX- THOU SHALL NOT CHEAT WITH CELEBRITIES.

X- THOU SHALL TREAT BOTH YOUR “SIDE-PIECE” & YOUR WIFE LIKE A QUEEN.

Learn it. Memorize it. Live by it.

In other news…

[Tirico Suave]: Kerry Collins stars in “God Dammit”

[Kissing Suzy Kolber]: Peter King stars in “Peter King Needs A Latte”

[Heavy.com]: Top 10 old school WWF wrestlers

[Gossip Girls]: Kim Kardashian might be on Dancing With the Stars. Schwing

[Deuce of Davenport]: Crazy-ass NFL merchandise, including the “creepiest sleeping bag ever”

[All Balls]: Just follow the bouncing boobs. Oh, god, we mean breasts. Uh, err, no, balls; wait, ball. Yea, that’s it; just follow the bouncing boobs. Dammit

[Rear Naked News]: Michael Bisping might have a death wish

[NE Patriots Draft]: More of Brett Favre this…

[StarTribune.com]: And more of Brett Favre that

[The Associated Press]: Congratulations on becoming the drunkest guy ever, Mr. 0.491 Percent Blood Alcohol Level

[The City of Champions]: The ol `Take off your shirt so we can get a picture of you and Photoshop it onto the cover of a gay porn rag’ trick gets `em every time

[The Redshirt Senior]: College pigskin’s top 10 lids

[Storming the Floor]: Texas set to retire Kevin Durant’s jersey. Sure, it was one heckuva season, but, damn!

[LAist.com]: UCLA is soooo totally ass-some

[Banned In Hollywood]: What? Allison’s back?? Quick, how’s our hair?

[FunnyOrDie.com]: Handsome + Me + Funny = Host

[SlashFilm.com]: Can you believe The Big Lebowski is already 10 years old?! Our baby’s growing up so quickly

And finally, when “Haha, now you’re dead!” is the absolute best you can do, these are the guys to call on.

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.
Categories
General Sports

So, if FSU athletes aren’t studying then what are they staring at all day long?


Bad news for Seminoles fans; you’re athletes are cheaters. But then again, so are your `athletic department academic assistance employees’. Yeah, and we’re supposed to believe that athletes across America don’t get preferential treatment.

School officials say two athletic department academic assistance employees have resigned and 23 athletes were implicated in cheating on tests given over the Internet. The athletes represent nine sports and 17 of the students are or have been on scholarship.

Officials could not identify the students and could not say which sports are involved because of federal confidentiality restrictions.

The students could face punishment from the university and NCAA including loss of eligibility. The NCAA also could sanction the university.

We don’t know whether to laugh or cry about this whole situation. It’s always sad to hear about students falling into the pratfalls of academic dishonesty. But, then again, it’s Florida State and we’ve always had a sneaking suspicion about their tactics. After all, this is the school that gave us Deion Sanders. Need we say more.

Links:

[NewsChannel5.com]: Seminoles athletes accused of cheating
[CBS Sports]: Florida State says 23 athletes implicated in Internet cheating

Categories
New England Patriots

Even Roger Goodell bows down to the great Bill Belichick


Don’t worry, you’re not the only one who thinks that NFL commish Roger Goodell just got soft. After Bill Belichick intentionally broke the rules during the very first week of the season, Goodell decided to dish out measly fines of $500,000 to Belichick, $250,000 to the Patriots and took away the team’s first-round draft pick next year if they reach they playoffs and second and third rounders if they don’t.

Talk about a slap on the wrist! He says that the draft picks will hurt the team more than suspending Belichick. Okay, whatever, he’s got his reasoning and who are we to argue. After all, his tenure so far has been pretty spectacular with his gift of Pacman Jones to professional wrestling and his lengthy suspensions of other notorious bad boys. But what gets us are the puny fines. $750,000 combined just seems a bit weak. Just the other day on the other side of the pond, the World Motor Sports Council slapped Team McLaren with a $100 million fine and stripped them of all their points due to a spying scandal! Now, that’s a fine!

It’s blatantly obvious that this isn’t the first time this has happened, regardless of what Belichick says or doesn’t say. So, while it’ll never happen and we all know the comments are in jest, who knows, maybe the Philadelphia Eagles really do have an argument.

I think they should forfeit, man,” said punt returner Reno Mahe, smiling. “We won the Super Bowl. I think we should get it.

I’m going to go trade my NFC championship ring for a Super Bowl ring.

Links:

[KETV.com]: NFL Fines Pats Coach Belichick $500,000
[6ABC.com]: Did The Patriots Cheat in Super Bowl?

Categories
All Other Sports

Odds and Ends: The Sport of Kings


Hunt organizers are accused of plying a tame bear with vodka-drench honey so that the King of Spain, Juan Carlos would have an easier time of killing a bear during a recent hunting excursion. Apparently, Russian hunt organizers have done this before as they used to ply animals with booze or tie them to trees so that former Soviet leader Brezhnev could still enjoy hunting even as he got older and his aim got worse.

Now Dick Cheney might shoot his friends in the face but he never had to resort to having hunt organizers ply quail with booze. America! Fuck Yeah!

In other news…

[Slate]: The physics of baseball’s most popular illegal pitches

[High and Tight]: Kenny Rogers no stranger to cheating

[MSNBC]: Backup punter surrenders on attempted murder charge for stabbing first string punter

[Hoops Addict]: Hey! Whatever Happened To John Starks?

[Fanblogs.com]: Ohio State #1 selling “Team Colors” paint

[TrojanWire]: Ivy League Mascot Wars: More Entertaining Than Ivy League Football

[Can’t Stop the Bleeding]: PETA Takes Credit For The NBA’s Much Maligned New Ball