Categories
Seattle Seahawks

"Eat spit!" Seattle cook taints Steelers fan’s burger


We know that allegiances run deep in the world of sports and, frankly, nothing can be more annoying than a loud-mouthed, obnoxious fan. Well, actually, you could be dealing with a bitter fast food cook with a little too much animosity on his hands and phlegm in his mouth.

A fast-food cook and Seattle Seahawks fan has been accused of spitting on a hamburger ordered by a man wearing Pittsburgh Steelers attire.

Kittitas County sheriff’s deputies say the 37-year-old customer was with his daughters at the Port Orchard-area eatery on Saturday. He reportedly traded remarks with an employee about Super Bowl XL in which the Seahawks lost to the Steelers.

When the customer opened his food container, he says there was spittle on the burger. He demanded a refund and called the fast-foot outlet’s district manager.

The manager told deputies a 24-year-old man might be responsible. The next day, deputies went to his house and smelled marijuana. The man was released after being booked for investigation of fourth-degree assault and possession of marijuana.

Ain’t karma amazing!

Links:

[Post-Gazette.com]: Seattle cook accused of spitting on Steeler fan’s burger

Categories
Seattle Seahawks

Rick Tuten don’t know nothing about nothing


Rick Tuten played for 12 years in the NFL. Granted, he was a punter but he still made a pretty decent living for a dozen years. But apparently it wasn’t enough — Tuten was arrested for selling stolen goods. Police started investigating Tuten when they realized that he was named by a lot of burglars as the guy who they sold stuff to so they set up a sting.


During a taped telephone conversation, a police informant told Tuten she had two stolen flat screen televisions valued at $1,500.

According to an affidavit, Tuten replied, “I don’t know nothing about nothing.” He then instructed the woman to deliver the items to his home. Tuten paid the woman $600 for the televisions and then asked her to deliver more.

How is it possible that OJ Simpson gets to play golf every day on his NFL pension but Rick Tuten has to sell stolen goods to make ends meet? We don’t get the NFLPA.

Links:
[AOL Sports]: Ex-Punter Arrested for Selling Stolen Goods

Categories
Tampa Bay Buccaneers

Odds and Ends: In case you want to get Jeff Garcia something for his wedding


Some guy over at the Fanhouse did some top-notch investigative journalism and found Jeff Garcia and Carmella DeCesare’s wedding registry on Williams-Sonoma. For a guy who just signed a $7M contract, Garcia’s registry is somewhat normal. Outside of a $1,600 knife set (on sale for $1,200!), it’s like a registry you’d find for poor people. (Poor relative to NFL players poor, not we’re registered at K-Mart poor.)

Anyone want to chip in on some Blueberry Waffle & Pancake Mix? Only $9.50 plus shipping!

In other news…

[AP]: EU wants barriers to sports bets lifted. (meanwhile we can’t even legally have an office pool)

[Seal Clubbers]: Seattle closes the door on Jerramy Stevens

[Can’t Stop the Bleeding]: Hey at least he didn’t wait till he was 24 like Shaun Alexander

[Newsday]: Bob Uecker’s stalker is back!

[Awful Announcing]: Does this mean we have to hate UNC now?

[49ers News]: Look out Niners fans, Rosenhaus is trying to ruin your team

Categories
Atlanta Falcons

Is there more to the Patrick Kerney rape story?


We were going to let this rape story go quietly into the night. Or at least quietly into the daily Odds and Ends entry. But it seems that there might be more to this story than was originally reported.

According to newspaper reports, a female friend of Patrick Kerney’s went to a party and invited some guys back to Kerney’s place for a night cap. She then fell asleep on the sofa and woke up in the bedroom where the suspect was having sex with her. She then escaped by telling the suspect that she was going to get a friend to join in and escaped through the bathroom window. (Ahhh, the old promise of the threesome foils the rapist story.) Kerney said that he has been informed of the assault but was asleep at the time and the victim said that Kerney was not involved.

Seems like a pretty cut and dried story right? Girl invites the wrong guys back to her place and someone slips her a roofie and rapes her. Well, we’ll let the big lead do the rumor mongering.


Our Georgia tipster says that Atlanta radio is buzzing with rumors and innuendo. “The Lodge, where the party started, was the big happening with [Kerney’s] former teammates. Then the afterparty went to his house. Word is the suspect was african american and a former player.” We’ll keep the updates coming as we get them.

Yikes, more bad news for the NFL. With Pacman Jones and the Bengals already blazing up the arrest charts, the last thing Roger Goodell needs is another black eye. By the way, “african american and a former player”? That rules out Morton Anderson.

Links:
[Seattle PI]: Woman friend of Seahawk is assaulted

Categories
NFL General

MNF or Muay Thai?

Last night, the MNF crew predicted that this video clip of Tyler Brayton kneeing Jerramy Stevens in the groin would be all over the blogs and news reports today. Surprisingly, it hasn’t been that big of a topic — perhaps because by the time the man foul happened, only 4 people were still watching.

Here’s the clip… and some reaction from There’s Your Karma, Ripe As Peaches.

P.S. What the hell was Christian Slater doing in the booth? Stop with the celebrity tie-ins, MNF/ESPN/DISNEY. You bitches.

Categories
Seattle Seahawks

Odds and Ends: Well, at least one person was having fun at Qwest Field on Sunday



Don’t mess with Al Davis

What to do when your team is getting beaten by the left guard they declined to resign and his new team? Have sex in a bathroom stall of course.

A prosecutor from nearby Thurston County was arrested after two female Qwest stadium employees told security that the man was having sex in a womens bathroom stall with a woman. The man claimed that he was simply going to the bathroom and not having sex… with a paralegal he’s worked with for the last 8 years. Ummm… OK.

In other news…

[Inside Bay Area]: Al Davis threatens to kick reporter’s ass

[AJC.com]: Chad Johnson talks all sorts of trash about “DeAngelo Fall”

[SI]: Tennessee mascot accused of biting Alabama player

[NY Post]: Isiah’s impact: Knicks Season ticket sales down 15%

[Mirror UK]: London will get first NFL regular season away game

[Cincinnati Enquirer]: Big Ben says a Falcon made fun of his motorcycle accident

Categories
Seattle Seahawks

The Madden Cover Curse stikes again: Shaun Alexander breaks foot



Death, Taxes, and
Madden cover jinx

When EA Sports announced that Shaun Alexander would be on the cover of Madden 2007, we knew it was only a matter of time before a major injury hit Alexander. Well, that time is now. The Seahawks announced that Alexander will be out indefinitely with a broken bone in his left foot. Mike Holmgren revealed that Alexander broke the bone sometime in the game against the New York Giants.

Time to update the Madden cover jinx hit list.

  • 2001 Eddie George: His jinx took a year to kick in but his rushing production went from 1509 yards to 939 the year after appearing on the cover.
  • 2002 Daunte Culpepper: Daunte went from fantasy stud (33 TDs and 3937 yards) to fantasy dud (14 TDs and 2612 yards) and finally succumbed to a knee injury.
  • 2003 Marshall Faulk: Total production went from 2147 to 1490 all purpose yards, a 44% decrease. The Rams went from Super Bowl runner up to 7-9.
  • 2004 Michael Vick: Broke his ankle in a preseason game. The quickest jinx in Madden history.
  • 2005 Ray Lewis: Ray Lewis avoids the cover jinx… because he was just standing there.. didn’t see a thing. Nope. Didn’t see a thing.
  • 2006 Donovan McNabb: DMac got into a highly publicized feud with Terrell Owens and then had his season cut short by a sports hernia.
  • 2007 Shaun Alexander: Breaks bone in left foot in the third game of the season.

Links:
[MSNBC]: Alexander out indefinitely with broken foot

Categories
Seattle Seahawks

Chad Eaton beaten up by his wife



Would you punch this man?

We realize that domestic violence isn’t funny… but you gotta admit it’s kinda funny when it’s a woman beating up a man — like when Lionel Richie got smacked up once, twice, three times by a lady. In this case, former Seahawk Chad Eaton’s wife might face domestic violence charges for punching him in the nose. He called the police and away she went.

In his playing days, Chad Eaton was listed at 6’5″ 303 pounds. His wife stands about 5’4″ and 120. Apparently she punched him for cheating on her. Now, we don’t know much about Chad Eaton except for his time on the Seahawks but Seattlest doesn’t seem to like his work as a sports personality on KCPQ channel 13 in Seattle.


It’s pretty difficult to avoid the urge to punch former Seahawk and Q13 sports “personality” Chad Eaton in the face.

Go ahead–try to watch him on the Seahawks postgame show, with his fake tan, absurdly-bulging musculature, and shiny too-tight shirt, looking like he’s just stopping by on his way to Venom, and see if your fist doesn’t ball right up out of pure instinct.

We doubt Chad Eaton is going to press charges. The coverage has been embarassing enough. Still, perhaps Chad was being the good guy here and called the police to pick up his wife so that he wouldn’t go all Brett Myers on her.

Links:
[Seattle PI]: Former Seahawk’s wife faces charge of domestic violence

Categories
Seattle Seahawks

Odds and Ends (06.08.06): Seahawks get their "we wuz robbed" rings

The Seattle Seahawks got their NFC Championship rings today in a ceremony in a tent. They were originally supposed to get their Super Bowl champions rings but were robbed by a couple of guys dressed in black and white. (Not quite old wounds, meet scab picking.) The ring itself has the Seahawks logo on a blue volcanic crystallized stone and is surrounded by 58 diamonds. Pretty nifty actually. Let’s hope no one steals it and sells it on ebay.

In other news…

[Fox Sports]: Man those Italian tax police are tough

[MSNBC]: Three known soccer hooligans (as if they were known terrorists) slip into Germany without passports

[Detroit Free Press]: WORLD CUP: It isn’t world peace — it’s more important

[The Hater Nation]: Wait, you can play college ball for 9 years?

[Behind the Jersey]: Results of NHL Fan surveys

[The Puck Stops Here]: NHL just making up the rules as they go along

Categories
Video Games

Madden 2007 is trying to wreck Shaun Alexander’s season



Sorry Seattle fans

EA Sports announced that Shaun Alexander, the Seattle Seahawks $62M man is going to be on the cover of Madden 2007. Seattle fans and Mike Holmgren are already cursing EA but Shaun is just happy to collect the big endorsement check.


To be on the cover of Madden NFL 07 is a big milestone in my career since I have always been a huge fan of this franchise. EA SPORTS is focusing on the running game in this year’s version, so I was honored when I was chosen to be on the cover to represent the improved running game.

We’ll see what Alexander has to say when he becomes the latest victim of the Madden cover jinx. Here’s the easiest Fantasy Football advice you’re going to get: DO NOT take Shaun Alexander with your first round pick.

Oh, the jinx is very real folks. I wouldn’t be surprised if the Vegas odds for Seattle winning the Super Bowl just dropped in half. Here’s a rundown of covers and actual performance since Eddie George in 2001.

  • 2001 Eddie George: His jinx took a year to kick in but his rushing production went from 1509 yards to 939 the year after appearing on the cover.
  • 2002 Daunte Culpepper: Daunte went from fantasy stud (33 TDs and 3937 yards) to fantasy dud (14 TDs and 2612 yards) and finally succumbed to a knee injury.
  • 2003 Marshall Faulk: Total production went from 2147 to 1490 all purpose yards, a 44% decrease. The Rams went from Super Bowl runner up to 7-9.
  • 2004 Michael Vick: Broke his ankle in a preseason game. The quickest jinx in Madden history.
  • 2005 Ray Lewis: Ray Lewis avoids the cover jinx… because he was just standing there.. didn’t see a thing. Nope. Didn’t see a thing.
  • 2006 Donovan McNabb: DMac got into a highly publicized feud with Terrell Owens and then had his season cut short by a sports hernia.

So what’s in store for Shaun Alexander? Here are the official SC odds:

  • 5-1 Torn ACL or MCL
  • 4-1 Ankle injury
  • 3-1 Sharp decline in production
  • 20-1 Broken ankle on horse collar tackle
  • 50-1 no injury
  • 100-1 Breaks hand while washing his truck

Links:
[Video Game Generation]: Seahawks MVP Shaun Alexandar Soars on Madden NFL 07 Cover