Categories
NBA General

Around the Rim: Detroit is going home, and that’s a good thing


1. Detroit makes the East finals, again
Detroit was on the verge of giving up a 3-0 lead to the Chicago Bulls but the Pistons went into Chi-Town for Game 5 and sealed up their fifth consecutive trip to the Eastern Conference finals with a 95-85 victory. In typical Detroit fashion, there was no flash or flare from any one player; it was just nine role players falling into line for the one uniting cause. The former Bad Boy and current Baby Bull Ben Wallace had to be extra disgusted as his old team celebrated in his new arena after he could only muster six points and seven rebounds in the elimination situation. Now that’s one stone cold fro! So, now there’s only thing on Detroit’s mind…

2. Who’s coming with us?

The Cavaliers will have another chance to put away those pesky Nets but this time they are going to have to do it with an arena full of fans telling `em that they suck. Then again, some Cleveland fans were making it rain boos during the fourth quarter as the Cavs shot just 3-of-16 in the period and didn’t make a bucket in the final 6:58 of the game. If Jason Kidd can manage to give another Big O type effort then this series will most likely be headed to the most loved and feared prospect in the playoffs: Game 7. Kidd is just short of averaging a triple-double for the series (14.4 pts, 11.8 reb, 8.8 ast), but don’t feel bad for the guy; after all, he is averaging a triple dip over the entire playoffs. That’s an amazing average of 14.2 points, 10.8 rebounds and 11.2 assists over an 11 game stretch! And so we don’t overlook his defensive production, we should also point out that Kidd is also 1.82 steals and .45 blocks per game. He’s a virtual human Swiss Army Knife.

3. And on the other side of the bracket
We know that the Utah Jazz are patiently awaiting the winner of the Phoenix/San Antonio series, but what we don’t know is if we are going to be witness to one or two more big time brawls before the West finals are set. The Suns fans are still pissed about the Amare Stoudemire and Boris Diaw suspensions for Game 5 in which the Spurs barely escaped Phoenix with victory and a 3-2 series edge, but obviously Mike D’Antoni and his staff are no longer concerned with the past. They can’t be; it’s time to win or go home as the old saying goes. The Spurs have got to be a bit worried after the Stoudemireless Suns almost bucked the odds because Steve Nash now has his favorite target back in the lineup which has got to be giving Gregg Popovich some serious stress headaches. Luckily, San Antonio will have the advantage of playing at home with a raucous crowd yelling at the top of their lungs. We just hope that they can come up with something a little more clever than “Dirty! Dirty!”

Thursday’s Player of the Day: Rasheed Wallace @ Chicago 39 min, 16 pts (FG: 7-14, 3FG: 2-8, FT: 0-1), 13 reb, 4 ast, 2 blk

Buzzer Beater: First the USA Basketball committee tried to put together a team of NBA superstars who were supposed to razzle-dazzle the international competition, but instead they just got exposed for the selfish hot dogers they were. So, then the masterminds decided that they would go after the hungrier, grittier ballers who weren’t afraid to get their hands dirty against the scrappy Euros and other quickly acclimating squads. That’s a much better strategy than trying to assemble another Dream Team except for when those hardnosed guys decide to turn you down. Recently crowned defensive player of the year Marcus Camby told USA Basketball that although it was a great honor, he would not be able to accept their invitation to participate in the qualifiers for the 2008 Olympics. So, now where does the red, white and blue look for their presence in the middle? None of the superstars are walking through that door, to steal a phrase, and the lower tier Cambys and Brad Millers of the league have other agendas (family, rehab, vacation, rolling in money) and don’t want to be part of the humiliation that has become USA Basketball. That gold medal is just becoming more and more unrealistic with every day that passes.

Categories
San Antonio Spurs

Odds and Ends: Tony Parker would like you to know he’s getting some


We’re pretty sure that this was prompted by Tony Parker getting sick of everyone asking him why he wasn’t getting any — Eva Longoria went on Ryan Seacrest’s radio show (the world is indeed ending) and announced that she and Tony were still having sex and that the rumor that she was holding out for the duration of the playoffs / until they were married is false.

Well, that makes us sleep better at night.

In other news…

[Star Tribune]: Woman sues ex-Viking over credit card

[NY Post]: Stephon Marbury and his $15 sneakers ready for world domination on Oprah

[The Offside]: Let’s hope he washed his hands before returning to goal.

[Sports By Brooks]: Warriors owner owes the IRS $160M in unpaid taxes.

[SI.com]: Ideas to shorten sporting events

[11 Alive]: Blind 106 year old bowler is better than you

And finally, Michael Vick actually gets some good news. It turns out that his herpes will protect him from bubonic plague and other germs. Unfortunately, there’s no immunization from animal rights activists.

Categories
General Sports

The Portland Beavers are giving away bobbleheads of a total stranger. Yippie!

Baseball is known for their oh so stupid promotions to get fans in the park and butts in the seats. And to borrow a quote from one of the greatest cinematic features of all time:

Just when I thought you couldn’t get any dumber, you go and do something like this… and totally redeem yourself!

The Portland Beavers are the Triple-A affiliate of the Los Angeles Dodgers and they decided that they would give away bobblehead dolls to the first 2,000 through the gates on August 18. But these aren’t going to be just any normal bobbleheads; no, the Beavers have put their own unique twist on the giveaway. Back in February, the promotions team decided to make “Bobblehead” day into “Bob L. Head” day and assembled a long list of people whose legal name was Bob L. Head (or any version of Bob, such as Bobby, Robert or Roberto).

Now, the list has been narrowed down to three lucky Bobs and it is up to you to determine which one makes the final cut. Voting will last through the end of the month but you can only vote once per computer. So, there will be no unfair stuffing of the ballot box for all you desperate folks who want Bob Lee Head from Indiana to win. But be sure to inform yourself about each of the candidates before you hit that Vote button because this is no laughing matter we’re talking about. 2,000 Bob L. Head bobbleheads are on the line here and even though we have no idea what it’s like to have a toy made in our image, we’re guessing that it feels a little something like this:

Links:

[PortlandBeavers.com]: Get Out the Vote: Bob L. Head race down to three
[OregonLive.com]: Early Bob L. Head nod goes to…

Categories
San Francisco Giants

Barry Bonds’ brother would like to be heard


We strongly believe that relatives of athletes should be seen and not heard (see Wilma McNabb) so it comes as no surprise that by opening his mouth, Bobby Bonds Jr. makes us hate Barry Bonds even more.


Hank Aaron does not even want to support Barry. Being a black man going through what he went through in the past and not supporting my brother, it kind of makes me look at him like, ‘Are you serious, brother? Are you serious?’

Cut the steroids out, just look at my brother as a human being. He stole bases, he ran, he caught the ball. It’s so hard to justify what’s going on with baseball and how they’re treating him.

First of all, he’s actually criticizing Hank Aarons? Is this like black on black crime or something? Why should Hank Aaron support a guy breaking his record by cheating? Most athletes will say that records are made to be broken but they hope that it’s done by someone with more talent than them or worked harder, not by someone who has more syringes.

Second, hate to break it to you bro, but Barry Bonds sucks as a human being as well. Yes, that’s right, he ran, he caught the ball, he stole bases… in the past. Now all he is is a roided up mass of muscle waiting for one pitch to knock over the fence. You’re driving a forklift in NJ while Barry is making $15M this year. That’s insane. That’s just completely insane.

Links:
[NJ.com]: Kid Brother Takes His Cuts

Categories
Phoenix Suns

Phoenix’s public enemy #1: Big Shot Bob


In case you haven’t noticed, the Phoenix Suns and their fans are just a little angry with Robert Horry. His infamous forearm to Steve Nash in the final moments of Game 4 sent shockwaves through the NBA as Big Shot Rob’s actions coaxed Amare Stoudemire and Boris Diaw off the Suns bench which earned the duo a pair of suspensions for Game 5. It’s arguable that the flagrant foul ended up costing the Suns the pivotal fifth game and possibly the series. So, AZCentral.com has come up with this creative method of allowing the Phoenix faithful to gain a small measure of revenge against Horry; even though it was their own player’s stupid decisions that kept them out of the arena on Wednesday night. We present to you… Whack-A-Horry.

Sure, it’s not nearly as much fun as the arcade version but how could it be without the feel of a giant padded mallet in your hands. But if it can calm the rage of a city then we say whack away. It might seem a bit silly to sit at your desk and virtually beat the crap out of an animated Horry head but it is a hell of a lot better than how Raiders fans decide to take out their frustrations.

Links:

[WOAI.com]: Whack-A-Horry: Arizona Website Posts Anger-Venting Game For Suns’ Fans

Categories
Golf

Day trader wins first World Series of Golf tourney



We going Sizzler!

A few months ago, we told you about the World Series of Golf, which combines golf with no limit poker style gambling on each hole. Well, the inaugural WSOG took place over the weekend and it was won by Mark Ewing, a 31-year-old day trader who quit his job two months ago to “take some risks in life.”

Ewing is only a 10-handicap but he managed to come up big at the end and make timely bets. Playing like a poker pro (and beating Phil Ivey), he forced his opponents to go all-in on the final hole 16th and made putt to secure first place and $250,000 in prize money. He will split the prize with two friends who each paid 1/3 of the entry fee. They planned on putting $40,000 of their prize money on one hand of blackjack. Charles Barkley would be proud.

Considering the popularity of poker, this type of betting seems to be a lot of fun. But it’d be a little difficult to keep track of during your weekly Sunday outing. Playing a round on the weekends is slow enough as it is, can you imagine having to deal with four jackasses in front of you trying to figure out chip leads and all-ins? Let’s hope this stays a TV sports.

Links:

[MSNBC]: Day trader wins World Series of Golf in Las Vegas

Categories
NBA General

Inside the NBA and sound bites; a match made in heaven

There’s only one thing we love more than an NBA playoff game, well there is that high school pole vaulter…ok, so there’s two things we love more than an NBA playoff game: apparently pole vaulting and, of course, an NBA playoff game on TNT. See, ordinary playoff coverage on ABC and ESPN brings you the facts and nothing but the facts. How boring. But the fellas at Inside the NBA show their audience that the game goes beyond the 48 minutes spent sweating on the court. So if you missed any of the great late night action with EJ, the Jet and Chuckles then here’s a quick recap.

It is going to be one sad day indeed when Charles Barkley decides to hang up his microphone. Mainly because it means that he’ll probably be running for governor of Alabama, but also because we won’t get to hear classic phrases like “Go to that box! Go to that box! And punish them midgets!” But we figure that with a mouth that big there is now way to avoid blunders of gubernatorial proportions should he get elected. Hey, if two steroid pumping meatheads from Predator can get into office then we’re saddened to say that Sir Cumference probably can too.

Categories
General Sports

May 16 2007 episode of Poor Man’s PTI

Welcome to another episode of Poor Man’s PTI. We’re back to our live format this week with lots to talk about.

You can download this week’s podcast directly (running time 70 mins) or subscribe to the feed.  

If you use iTunes, just click here and then click subscribe and iTunes will take care of the rest.

This week’s topics include:

  • NBA playoffs: suspensions, the Warriors, the Bulls
  • Michael Vick’s dogfights
  • Brett Favre
  • Amanda Beard in Playboy
  • MLB and the demise of the Yankees

Hope you guys enjoy the podcast.  If you did enjoy it, please give us a good rating below so we can rise up in the rankings. If you didn’t, send us an email ([email protected]) and give us some suggestions. Thanks for listening.

Categories
NBA General

Around the Rim: Another ESPN Instant Classic was just born



And this was the scene before the game.

1. Phoenix gets burned in the Valley of the Sun
Game 5 between the Spurs and the Suns was a tale of two halves. The first half saw Shawn Marion light up the jumbotron with 20 points and 11 rebounds en route to an 11 point lead at the break as San Antonio was a nonexistent 0-of-7 from behind the arc. Fast forward past the Frisbee catching dog or whatever ridiculous half time gimmick the Suns front office pulled out of the hat for this game and in the second half, the Spurs were a very existent 8-of-16 from three land as Marion could only score four points and grab six boards over the final 12 minutes. Algebra 101 taught us that if you add those two halves together you get an 88-85 San Antonio victory, which is equal to one whole win for the guys in black; giving the Spurs a grand total of a 3-2 lead in the series. And you thought we slept our way through high school. The Suns fought a heck of a fight without their All-NBA first teamer Amare Stoudemire and Boris Diaw but Manu Ginobili played terrific down the stretch, minus a few unforgivable turnovers, while Bruce Bowen and Michael Finley hit several ginormous shots. Throw in the usual 20 point, 10 rebound, 3 block (21, 12 and 5 to be exact) game from Tim Duncan and the incredibly unyielding NBA rulebook and it all simply added up to odds that Phoenix just couldn’t overcome.

2. Like nats, the Nets just won’t go away

There must be something in the water over in the Eastern Conference because the Nets, like the Bulls, keep finding a way to avoid elimination and keep their postseason hopes alive. Perhaps they’re using the Vitamin Water that failed to get Tracy McGrady out of the first round but allowed him to perform one of the sweetest sheep tosses ever caught on camera. Now, Game 5 between the Nets and Cavs was nowhere near being as interesting as the Highland Games, but how could it when the final score was 83-72 and the Nets won despite scoring just six points in the final quarter on 1-of-15 shooting. Still, what the game lacked in excitement, it certainly made up for in importance as the Nets are now within one game, 3-2, of Cleveland with the series headed back to Jersey for Game 6. Whatever the mystery substance might be that New Jersey is chuggin’, they certainly didn’t share any of it with LeBron James. His royal highness finished the game with just 20 points as he missed nine of his 14 field goal attempts. Thank goodness for free throws.

3. Whoa No Nellie!
He’s only been back behind the clipboard for a year now, but Don Nelson could be done with the Golden State franchise that he rapidly resurrected into the feel-good story of the year. Well, at least until they got eliminated by the Jazz they were. And forget about all their poor sportsmanship that resulted in tons o’ techs and flagrant fouls. But, other than that, totally a feel-good story. Still, Nellie might not be ready to write another chapter in this book because, as he says, he’s “not so sure it’s important that I stay on.” C’mon, Nelson, stop being modest. This team would be on the fast track to a Jailblazers-esque reputation without the Don around to keep this fast paced squad in check, both on and off the court. Talk about a fork in the road! Golden State could grow into a Western Conference contender with Nelson at the helm or they can take their old position alongside the Clippers, Hawks and Bobcats of the league with some other ham-fisted, poor excuse of a coach. Fans of The City better hope Nellie feels like his body can take another yearlong beatdown or they can forget about using those yellow “We Believe” shirts for anything other than wearing to the gym.

Wednesday’s Player of the Day: Shawn Marion vs. San Antonio 46 min, 24 pts (FG: 9-16, 3FG: 2-4, FT: 4-4), 17 reb, 1 ast, 1 stl, 1 blk

Buzzer Beater: Mark Cuban is one of the most annoying, childish and arrogant human beings to ever walk the face of the earth. Oh, and he cries like a baby too! Having said that, he also makes some pretty solid points from time to time. After all, he didn’t become a billionaire by being an idiot. So, as much as it pains us to agree with this jackass, here’s an excerpt of what Cubes had to say about the Spurs/Suns suspensions in his blog.

First, let me go on the record as saying that in the event that a vote comes up to change the rules about suspensions for players leaving the bench, I will vote against changing it.

Why ? Because its incredibly simple to educate players about the rule. Its a rule they fully understand and they understand the consequences of violating the rule. That makes the NBA stronger because it removes uncertainty. Can it result in a game(s) being impacted , yes. However, that impact results from an action a player knew violated the rules and was a mistake. There is no uncertainty about it. All they had to do was not leave the bench.

Categories
NBA General

Odds and Ends: More on the NBA ref racial bias study



Should we call it on the black guy?

A couple of weeks ago, we told you about a study that concluded that there was a racial bias in foul calls in the NBA. One of the major flaws in that study was that the data was based on box scores and only the racial makeup of the three member crews could be used in the analysis instead of which ref made which call. Well, after the NBA criticized the study, they released actual person by person foul call data to Justin Wolfers, the professor who penned the study.

After reviewing the new data, Wolfers found that the NBA’s data actually confirms racial bias in officiating. Doh! An independent analysis of both Wolfer’s and the NBA’s study confirmed the findings in Wolfer’s study. The NBA is taking an ostrich approach: “It’s done. It’s over. We have nothing to add to what we have said already.”

In other news…

[NY Times]: Some people think an amputee sprinter might actually has an unfair advantae in the Olympics.

[Indystar.com]: Colts say no to car honoring team in the Indy 500.

[Milwaukee Journal Sentinel]: Hey, Ruben Patterson, don’t forget: you’re a sex offender.

[Off Color Commentary]: Pam Oliver sucks

[One More Dying Quail]: Baseball’s All-Height Team

And finally, we have two stories on why ESPN sucks donkey. First, is Fantasy Fishing. Boy, we can’t wait to get our office ready for this thing. Second, the National Spelling Bee will be hosted by Mike and Mike. How many Golic is so dumb, he can’t spell cat jokes will there be? 200? ESPN really is ruining everything holy in sports/almost sports.