General Sports

The Talented Mr. Roto does NOT like waiting

If you’re anything like us then you waste at least 10 hours a day listening to ESPN podcasts. And we’re just scratching the surface on the pile of podcasts produced everyday by the Worldwide Leader in Sports. Most of the time, nothing juicy happens. Mike Tirico blabbers to Scott Van Pelt, Barry Melrose gets interviewed by some hockey dork and if you’re lucky then you’ll hear someone make fun of Stu Scott’s lazy eye. So, why do we even bother listening to this stuff? It’s all for moments like this between football yapper Jeremy Green (son of “If you want to crown their asses then crown `em” Dennis Green) and annoying douches Matthew Berry and Nate Ravitz.

Fantasy Baseball
by bsap11

Damn, a couple more minutes and we were bound to have a situation like this on our hands.


[Awful Announcing]: ESPN Fantasy Podcast Fights Are Fun

All Other Sports

Dana White still despises Tito Ortiz

If you know anything about the UFC then you know owner Dana White and fighter Tito Ortiz absolutely hate each other. Oh, you’re new to the sport? Well, here, let us give you a quick synopsis of White’s current feelings for the former UFC champ turned Donald Trump wannabe crony.

“Tito is a f�”ing idiot,” White said. “He’s one of the dumbest human beings I’ve ever met. Everything that comes out of his mouth makes no sense.”

White added that he doesn’t think UFC needs Ortiz because he doesn’t think Ortiz can beat any of UFC’s top fighters.

“I put up with his s�” when he was a good fighter,” White said. “He’s not anymore.”

“He’s not in anybody’s Top 10,” White said. “I have no interest whatsoever in being in the Tito Ortiz business. … I’ve never wanted to see anyone get their ass kicked worse than I want to see Tito get his kicked next Saturday night.”

Ortiz getting his ass handed to him by Lyoto Machida this weekend might be pretty embarrassing for the Huntington Beach Bad Boy, but can anything really be more humiliating for Ortiz than his relationship with this?!


[]: Dana White Wants To See Tito Ortiz Get Beatdown Next Week

All Other Sports

The future of hockey hooliganism is in good hands

We knew that Jonathan Roy, son of hockey great Patrick Roy, was already a loose cannon after he skated clear across the ice to get his brawl on, but we had no idea that Todd Bertuzzi had a kid who was already following in his father’s footsteps.

A 17-year-old boy has been charged with assault with a weapon following an alleged stick-swinging incident during a hockey game in southwestern Ontario.

Provincial police say a player on a midget team from Paris, Ont., took a two-handed swing with his stick during a Feb. 22 game and hit an opposing player in the abdomen.

The injured player, from the nearby town of Caledonia, was taken to Brantford General Hospital with a ruptured spleen and internal bleeding.

We’re guessing it looked a little bit like this only it wasn’t in an office and the kid got whacked in the gut.


[]: Teen charged after alleged assault with hockey stick

All Other Sports

Mean Girls ain’t got nothing on these cheerleaders

You know that old saying about girls being made of sugar and spice and everything nice? Well, these cheerleader chicks skipped out on waiting for that crap and got pumped full of anger and piss and lots of clinched fists.

Hey, how would you react if someone talked smack about you on their MySpace page?!?


[]: Florida Teens Video Tape Ambush of Internet Rival

College Basketball

Mascots let their big heads go to their big heads

Mascot misbehavior has been at an all-time high this year. It seems like every time you turn around some dope in a costume is attacking some other dope in a costume. Tuesday night at the Summit League tournament championship the mascots from IUPUI and Oral Roberts got to scraping. Unfortunately, no heads went rolling.

Minnesota Vikings

Bryant McKinnie arrested after spitting and hitting

The Minnesota Vikings are at it again. Only this time, the good stuff is going down on dry land instead of on the Love Boat. Vikes tackle Bryant McKinnie went Street Fighter early Sunday morning, brawling outside of a Miami club. McKinnie found himself in the pokey as a result, arrested on counts of aggravated battery, disorderly conduct and resisting arrest without violence. Nice work, Bryant.

Authorities were called to Club Space after a fight broke out. McKinnie had been thrown out by a nightclub security guard and was arguing and spit on Eric Otero, according to a police report.

Otero, 32, said he wouldn’t press charges if McKinnie left. Authorities said the former University of Miami football player then went to a nearby strip club, but later returned to Club Space and fought with Otero again.

Miami Police found McKinnie “in the middle of a large crowd, throwing punches and again yelling obscenities,” according to the police report.

Police told McKinnie to stop. He refused and boarded a bus. The bus driver was ordered not to drive away.

McKinnie, who has been a staple on the Vikings offensive line since being drafted out of Miami in 2002, was arrested and bonded out for $9,000 at 2:25 p.m., Miami-Dade County Corrections Department spokeswoman Janelle Hall said.

It’s pretty impressive when you think about it. McKinnie has criminal charges against him on the ground and on the water, so the only place left for McKinnie to get into trouble is in the sky.


[]: Viking’s tackle arrested after street fight

All Other Sports

Floyd Mayweather faces his BIGGEST challenge to date, even if it’s fake

Floyd Mayweather doesn’t need any cheap gimmicks to keep his name in the headlines or to remind people that he is the best pound-for-pound fighter in the world, but that didn’t stop him displaying his twinkle-toes on Dancing With the Stars. On Sunday, he did it again by hopping in the ring with The Big Show at the WWE pay-per-view No Way Out. In case you haven’t heard, Mayweather teed off on the big fella and broke his nose, leaving one pissed off, bleeding giant wanting revenge. On Monday Night RAW, Show got what he wanted when he convinced Mayweather to take him on in a wrestling match. We don’t know how the WWE plans to spin this thing, but it should be interesting to watch. Hopefully, just hopefully, it ends with another flurry of fists; just like it started.

Phoenix Suns

Bill Walton and Shaq won’t be sending Valentines to each other this year

For as goofy and outlandish as Bill Walton is, the guy knows his basketball and on Sunday he weighed in on the Shaquille O’Neal trade. Now, normally, people don’t even pay attention to the Big Redhead – heck, we get the feeling his own partners in the studio tune him out for about half the show – but, not the Diesel. Nope, Shaq hears all.

He really can’t win in this situation,” Walton said of O’Neal. “Because what he did in Miami by saying, ‘I can’t play at all,’ and now it’s, ‘I’m going to win the championship (in Phoenix).’ That is just absolutely ludicrous. Shaq’s arrogance is an insult to people who think.

Wait, did somebody say insult?

O’Neal’s response: “Bill Walton has broken the Big Man Pecking Order Code — Ordinance 2257 — which means his resume isn’t quite good enough to speak on what I have done.

“One thing I hate is a hypocrite. So if I’m faking an injury, his whole injury-plagued career is a fake. Here’s a guy who only played one or two seasons injury-free, and now he’s talking about me being injured. So, one thing I really hate is a hypocrite.

In 16 years, Shaq has earned the right to say whatever he wants to whoever he wants, but we gotta side with the Dead Head on this one. Walton can’t even sniff Shaq’s jock when it comes to statistics and career accomplishments, but he’s got every right to say O’Neal was loafing in Miami… because it certainly appears that he WAS!

C’mon Shaq; you missed 17 games for a Miami squad that has a horrible record, but now you’re suddenly healthy enough to run with the Phoenix Suns?!?! And don’t try to give us that B.S. about the amazing attributes of the Suns training staff. Shaq has proven over and over and over again during his career that he hates to lose and he’s proven he’ll turn on anyone once the crap hits the fan. This is just the latest case. To say otherwise is simply an insult to people who think.


[]: Shaq battles back

All Other Sports

Brawl breaks out at Russian hockey game

When Russians play hockey, they play for keeps. And when they fight, they fight to win. Combine the two and you’ve got the recipe for a whole lotta blood on the ice.

Talk about an orgy of violence! If anyone ever decides to produce The Outsiders on ice then this is exactly what we’d expect to see at the end.


[Jerseys and Hockey Love]: Russian Hockey Fight

College Football

"Rowdy" Razorback Darren McFadden gets cuffed outside a bar

Now that the college football season is over and done, the next date to circle on the calendar is NFL Draft day. And between now and then, you’re going to hear a lot about the Arkansas Razorbacks Mr. All-Purpose Darren McFadden. Well, the McFadden jabber has begun, but it’s not regarding his on-field prowess.

Razorback Darren McFadden was involved in a fight at a local bar and was placed in handcuffs. Around 12:15 Thursday morning, D-Mac got into an argument at a bar in downtown Little Rock.

The fight involved one of the bar bouncers. Authorities say that one of McFadden’s relatives was being escorted out of Ernie Biggs when McFadden and the people he was with got involved in a fight with Brant Hankins, the bouncer.

The argument went into the streets of the Rivermarket where the Little Rock Police Department put D-Mac in handcuffs for “agitated and provoking aggressive behavior.” Once he calmed down the handcuffs were removed.

So far, he has not been charged, but this could be a battery 3rd degree charge if Hankins presses charges.

According to, Hankins was punched in the face as he escorted the group from the bar. It’s unclear if McFadden was the culprit in the punching, but cops say the two-time Heisman runner up was being pretty “rowdy.”.

There was a whole bunch of people there,” [police Lt. Terry] Hastings said. “They were inside and it spilled out into the street.”

Outside, McFadden was handcuffed by a police officer “because he was agitated and was provoking aggressive behavior inciting the incident,” according to the police report.

“We handcuffed him for a few minutes because he was rowdy,” Hastings said.

McFadden, who was the only person handcuffed, was released after he calmed down. Hastings said it was routine procedure to handcuff a person to gain control of a situation.

We know this is McFadden’s second bar fight in recent history, but we really hope this was just a random incident and not the beginning of a self-destructive pattern of behavior. This guy is way too talented to be on the wrong side of the law. Needless to say, the only time McFadden should ever be handcuffed is when NFL fantasy owners pickup his backup at next season’s draft.


[]: Darren McFadden in Fight at Little Rock Bar
[]: McFadden handcuffed briefly in bar fight