Categories
NFL General

Chris Leak makes the Wonderlic test cry


Our favorite part of the NFL combine is the wonderlic test scores that come out afterward. Remember last year when Vince Young scored a -2 and then retook the test and got a 16? Well this year’s Vince Young is Florida Gator QB Chris Leak. We’ll give this its own paragaph:

Chris Leak scored an 8 on the Wonderlic.

An 8! Remember, a score of 10 indicates that you are literate. Scoring an 8 literally means you are a moron. So why hasn’t this news been all over the press? Perhaps Vince Young set the bar so low last year that an 8 isn’t that big of a news item. Yet another championship QB in the league that can’t put on his own shoes. Psssst… the Reebok logo on the outside tells you which shoe is the left and which is the right.

To see if you’re smarter than Chris Leak (chances are yes), check out this sample wonderlic test.

Here are some other notable scores from QBs in this year’s draft:

Brady Quinn, Notre Dame: 29
Drew Stanton, Michigan State: 35
Kevin Kolb, Houston: 28
John Beck, BYU: 30
Jordan Palmer, UTEP: 23
Tyler Palko, Pittsburgh: 18

Links:
[Macmarabile.com]: NFL QB Wonderlic Scores

Categories
Tennessee Titans

More on the Pacman Jones triple shooting



Not a care in the world

There are no new developments in the Pacman Jones strip club shooting but there are a couple stories in the press related to the incident where a club bouncer was shot in the spine and paralyzed from the waist down.

First, criminal defense lawyers not associated with the case are saying that unless there is damning video evidence, it’s going to be next to impossible to prove that Jones had anything to do with the incident. First the police have to find the shooter, then they have to link him to Jones.


If Pacman was with this individual and maybe knew he carried a weapon from time to time but never told him to go back to the vehicle to get a weapon and … had no feelings that (the shooting) was going to happen, then just because he might have been with him doesn’t make him criminally responsible for anything.

If he (Jones) knows what the other person is up to and encourages or incites another person to go back in there and shoot and cause that man to be paralyzed, then he is in serious trouble. That is in both criminal and civil, but the only problem with criminal is how are you going to prove that?

Basically, even if Jones knew the shooter and was involved it would be impossible to implicate Jones unless the shooter fingers Jones and we get the feeling that some cash in a duffle bag would solve that little problem.

Meanwhile, Roger Goodell is sick of the off-the-field incidents and so are other players. They want Goodell to crack down on chronic troublemakers. Gene Upshaw agrees:


They don’t want to be painted with the same brush as these guys [that are getting into trouble]. They want players held accountable for their actions and their decisions, just like they are with the drug policy. They want penalties for guys who continually put themselves in the wrong place at the wrong time. They feel a guy should only have so many chances. They want three strikes and you’re out.

There could be some sort of policy in place by as early as Junes, although that would not likely affect Jones retroactively.

And finally, a former NYC cop living in Las Vegas and friend of the bouncer who was shot says that the Las Vegas police department is incompetent and has questions about the way they handled the incident.

We get the feeling nothing is going to happen to Pac Man Jones (although we should assume innocence here) until his next run in with the law at a strip club at 4 a.m.

Links:

[Tennessean]: If Pacman broke law, proving it may be tough
[Philly.com]: Owners, players want to bust bad guys

[SC]: Strip club owner says Pacman Jones knew shooter

Categories
NBA General

Around the Rim: It’s a Ring Thing


1. Lord of the Rings to Be?
Now that the trade deadline has passed, the only interesting move left for teams to make involves the veteran champion, Scottie Pippen. Looks like the two leading candidates in the Pip sweepstakes are the San Antonio Spurs and the Los Angeles Lakers. Pippen would be an excellent addition to either team, but he could probably adapt to Phil Jackson’s system a little bit quicker since he has some past experience with the Zen Master. San Antonio would offer a better opportunity for Pippen to get his seventh ring. He’d be joining a veteran team and most likely assume a role similar to the one Robert Horry has filled for the past few years. Pippen can’t be the player he once was, but any team would be happy to acquire a guy who has big game experience as the season is reaching its end.

2. The Nowitzki Experience
The Mavericks franchise tried to give their superstar a push for MVP last night by passing out about 20,000 T-shirts to the crowd. But Dirk didn’t really need any help as he scored 31 to go with 11 rebounds, six rebounds and two blocks. There’s lots and lots of big-time talent in the league this year, but Dirk has outshined them all. The Mavs have been riding on the back of Dirk all year en route to the league’s best record on three separate 10+ game win streaks. With one of the sweetest strokes in the game today, Nowitzki has been shooting the lights out all year long as he is averaging 25 points per game. And considering that the award usually is simply handed to the best player on the league’s best team; Nowitzki is definitely in the driver’s seat for the NBA’s most prestigious individual award.

3. Headbandless Hero
Remember at the beginning of the season when everybody thought that something was wrong with Ben Wallace? Well, that doesn’t seem to a topic of conversation anymore. Big Ben might have had the greatest game of his career last night against the Cavaliers when he had 14 points, 19 rebound, five assists, two steals and seven blocks. After a slow start to the year, Wallace has methodically increased his rebounding average back to double digits (10.5). But the Bulls are still sitting five games behind the Central Division leading Pistons. Chicago could have probably benefited from a trade, but Luol Deng and Ben Gordon just have too much potential for the Bulls to let them go.

Thursday’s Player of the Day: Gilbert Arenas vs. Sacramento 45 min, 43 pts (FG: 12-22, 3FG: 3-8, FT: 16-17), 7 reb, 7 ast, 3 stl

Friday’s Game to Watch: Utah (35-18) @ Denver (26-26) Every game involving the Nuggets is interesting as everybody is waiting to see Carmelo

Anthony and Allen Iverson finally gel. So far, it hasn’t happened. In fact, the two have still yet to even play in a significant number of games together. Overall, the Nuggets are 9-4 over their last 13 games with the latest loss coming while the dynamic duo was intact. Utah hasn’t been the team they were when the season started, but they are still a very dangerous club. The Jazz have won six of their last seven as Mehmet Okur and Deron Williams continue to pick up the slack while forward Carlos Boozer continues to watch from the bench.

Buzzer Beater: As usual, we approached the trade deadline with lots of talk about superstars changing teams. But, as usual, the deadline came and went and nobody of significance was involved in a swap. Jason Kidd, Vince Carter, Pau Gasol, Mike Bibby and Ray Allen were just a few of the names dropped in the weeks leading up to yesterday. And what about Corey Maggette? Trade rumors have been swirling around him for months now as his relationship with Clippers coach Mike Dunleavy seemed to deteriorate daily. Apparently, they are going to have to tolerate each other for a few more months. In the end, only lower tier players got new addresses; Anthony Johnson to Dallas, Fred Jones went to Portland in a deal for Juan Dixon who got sent to Toronto and the Jazz picked up Alan Henderson.

Categories
Ottawa Senators

Ray Emery leads a good old fashioned hockey brawl

Check out this video of the brawl last night between the Sens and the Sabres. The absolute best thing about hockey brawls is that the goalies are compelled by hockey tradition to fight each other even though they probably never crossed each other’s paths the entire game. Ray Emery gets the nod for this brawl because not only does he dispatch with Martin Biron, he then turns his sights on Sabres goon Andrew Peters. They always say goalies are a little wacko. Emery is just deranged.

Don’t forget to check out our favorite Buffalo site Bfloblog for their reaction to the brawl.

Links:
[Toss in the Towel]: Ray Emery Fights Biron AND Peters! He’s Crazy…And I love It!

Categories
NBA General

Our very last Tim Hardaway hates gays story


(Until our next Tim Hardaway hates gays story…)

It doesn’t surprise us that Scoop Jackson is friends with Tim Hardaway. Morons tend to like other morons as company. But we have to hand it to Scoop, he got the interview that probably no one else would have gotten. And he didn’t have to bojangle for it!

Basically, Tim Hardaway blames the entire situation on his misuse of the word ‘hate’ and that it means something different to him than the rest of the world.


But I was never brought up to hate anybody, you know that. But that’s just the word and that’s how we used it. You know when we got a whopping we’d be like, “I hate my moms” or “I hate my dad,” and at the time you really didn’t hate them, but that was the word you used. You know I can go into a restaurant and say, “I hate this food, I hate the chef, I don’t even know why I came back to this restaurant.” But I know I can’t use the word like that, or let’s say I’m not supposed to. People have come up to me and told me, “Tim, you can’t say that you hate gay people because it’s not the same term.” But that’s how I talk. That’s the way I am.

Timmy also went to the Jim Mora Jr. Defense and said that he forgot he to censor himself because he and Dan LeBatard are “real cool and [they] were just having fun on the radio.”

Finally, Timmy still stands by his bigoted views on gays.


No. I don’t want to … try to find some type of understanding of why they live the way they live or why they are the way they are. Maybe I could go to therapy, maybe someone can help me out with understanding [them], the sensitivity of the issue. But as a person, my beliefs are my beliefs. I don’t have to condone it and I don’t have to be around it. But I don’t have to hate it either.

You’ve got to admire Hardaway for his conviction even if he is a moron. The latest fallout? Miami’s Channel 10 has decided not to rehire Hardaway as the Heat playoff analyst this year. Good luck with the rest of your career, Timmy. Maybe you can do Dancing with the Stars with Elton John to repair your image.

Links:
[ESPN]: ‘I don’t have a hate bone in my body’

Categories
College Football

Have you seen the Cincinnati football sex tape?


Admit it, you immediately thought of the Bengals right? The Bengals reputation for dirty deeds is so strong that any wrongdoing immediately conjures up the orange and black. But nope, it’s the Bearcats this time.

The University of Cincinnati is investigating allegations that four football players and four recruits had sex with a former soccer player during a recruiting trip and videotaped it. The sex tape is being circulated around campus. (If anyone has a copy, we’d love to see it.)
Officials were notified via an anonymous letter from a “Concerned Athletic Department Employee” and are proceeding “methodically and thoroughly.” The letter was sent to Daniel Cummins, Director Judicial Affairs because the writer did not trust the Athletic Director Mike Thomas.


I am bring this to your attention, due to the fact that I have no confidence in our senior leadership of the Athletic Department to complete a thorough investigation. I hate seen on numerous occasions that the men’s basketball program and the football programs have received preferential treatment by our Athletic Director.

Remember, four football players having sex with someone is fine but once you bring recruits into it then it violates legislation that the NCAA passed in 2004 the prohibited the use of alcohol and sex as recruiting tools. (Gary Barnett thinks, ‘well how the are we supposed to recruit em!’) The Bearcats had at least five recruiting weekends this winter and one occurred before new coach Brian Kelly’s watch. Kelly is praying that the timestamp on the videotape shows a date prior to Dec 4 2006.

That’s a hell of an 8 on 1 drill.

Links:
[Enquirer]: UC: Letter to be investigated
[Enquirer]: Investigation ‘making progress’

Categories
Boston Celtics

Former Celtic Dennis Johnson dead at 52


The AP is reporting that Dennis Johnson has died at the age of 52. Johnson was an integral member of those legendary ’80s Celtics team that still make us stop to watch every time we come across them on ESPN Classic. “DJ” collapsed after a D-league practice where he was the coach of the Austin Toros. The Travis County Medical Examiner’s Office has confirmed that Dennis Johnson is deceased and an autopsy is to be performed. More information to follow.

We’re sure there will be a lot of retrospectives of Johnson’s career over the next week or so. However, we’d like to say that we hated Dennis Johnson. Hated him. But we’re Sixers fans. That’s how good he was. Like a wise man once said, they don’t boo nobodies.

Links:
[Star-Telegram]: Former NBA great Dennis Johnson dies

Categories
Golf

Fuzzy Zoeller suing over Wikipedia entry



I am no wife beater!

Fuzzy Zoeller is suing a company in Florida for “defamation, false light invasion of privacy, and intentional infliction of emotional distress” over statements that someone at Josef Silny and Associates, Inc. posted on Wikipedia. Since he can’t sue Wikipedia, he traced the IP address of the posting to the company and is suing them instead. Here is the offending passage:


Later Zoeller went public with his alcoholism and prescription drug addiction, explaining that at the time he made those statements, he was “in the process of polishing off a fifth of Jack (Daniels) after popping a handful of vicodin pills”. He further detailed the violent nature of his disease, recalling how he’d viciously beat his wife Dianne and their four children while under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol. He also admitted feigning a ruptured spinal disc in 1985 so as to be prescribed a multitude of prescription medication.

He sought professional help and mended his fractured familial relationships. In May 2006, Zoeller said in an interview with Golf Digest magazine that he hadn’t beaten his wife in nearly five years.

According to the lawsuit:


The false statements published by Defendant JOSEF SILNY AND ASSOCIATES, INC. tended to subject MR. DOE to hatred, distrust, ridicule, contempt, and disgrace in that they depicted MR. DOE as an alcoholic and prescription drug addict, who is possessed of a violent nature which had caused him to “viciously beat his wife and their four children”, and as someone who had committed the crime of falsifying ailment in order to obtain prescription drugs.

Yeah, we can see why Fuzzy Zoeller MR. DOE would be mad about that. While the offending passage has been taken out of the Fuzzy Zoeller wikipedia entry, it still remains on Answers.com and that’s probably how the Miami Herald was able to deduce the super secret identity of MR. DOE.

We hope Fuzzy doesn’t sue us for repeating the passage, after all, we can barely afford to put collard greens or whatever the hell we serve on the table.

Links:
[Miami Herald]: Golfer Zoeller sues Miami firm for Wikipedia posting
[Miami Herald]: Fuzzy Zoeller lawsuit pdf
[Answers.com]: Fuzzy Zoeller

Categories
Tennessee Titans

Strip club owner says Pacman Jones knew shooter



Photo from Sportsline

Adam “Pacman” Jones, who brought you such hits as “Chickenheads to the left, high class hos to the right” and “She stole my wallet!“, has released a new single titled, “That stripper took my money”.

His lawyer claims that Pacman was there but “nobody with him had a gun or fired a gun or was involved in any criminal activity.” However, Robert Susnar, co-owner of the club says that Pacman is lying and that he was sitting next to the shooter and came and left with him. According to Susnar, the trouble started after 4 a.m.


Jones had tossed hundreds of $1 bills on the stripper stage, an action known in street slang as “making it rain.” When one of the strippers started grabbing the money without Jones’ permission, he got angry, grabbed her hair and slammed her head against the stage, Susnar said.

That’s when security guard Aaron Cudworth, a mixed-martial artist with professional fighting experience, intervened and stopped the assault, he said.

“At that point, Pacman said, ‘I’m going to kill you,'” Susnar said.

A melee ensued as Cudworth scuffled with Jones and members of his entourage, Susnar said.

Order was eventually restored, and everyone was moved outside. That’s when the gunman opened fire toward the front door of the club, hitting Cudworth, security guard Tom Urbanski and a female customer.

According to Jones’ lawyer the commotion had nothing to do with Pacman allegedly slamming a stripper’s head into the stage and happened because Jones threw a bunch of money on stage and all the hos onstage and off started a wild dive for the bills. (We added in the hos part.) Eventually the surveillance tapes will tell the truth. It might be a very long long offseason for Jones.

The saddest part of this story is the security guard who started working there only two weeks before getting shot. He was moonlighting to put his wife through law school. Susnar said, “What does he get for a hard day’s work? A bullet in the spine because of a jackass athlete. It’s the most tragic thing I can imagine.”

Links:

[Las Vegas Review Journal]: Police looking at NFL player’s friend in strip club shooting

Categories
NBA General

Around the Rim: There’s No Crying in Basketball!


1. Tears of a Clown
Just when it looked like things were going to start turning around for the Miami Heat, Dwyane Wade injures his left shoulder and a loss spoils Pat Riley’s return to the bench. Wade got wrapped up with Houston’s Shane Battier in the fourth quarter and appeared to be in pain as he headed for the bench with 27 points and nine assists. Eventually he was taken from the court in a wheelchair. Geez, what a drama queen. And we thought your new Eurkel commercial was the extent of your thespian talents. Seriously though; a wheelchair? But despite his theatrical exit, should this injury prove to be serious, it could spell the end of any legitimate hopes Miami had for a title defense. Before last night, the Heat had been, well, hot, winning six of seven since the Daddy made his way back into the lineup at the beginning of the month.

2. Two Games, Five Players, 178 Points
Last night’s game between San Antonio and Atlanta saw a trio of players combine for whopping 100 points as the Spurs’ Manu Ginobili put up a season-high 40, while Tim Duncan scored 30. On the other side of the court, Joe Johnson had a team-high 30 points to match Duncan’s output. But two is always better than one and the Spurs took the contest, 103-96. During one stretch in the first half, Ginobili scored 24 consecutive points for San Antonio as he took a 27 point performance into the locker room at halftime. But that wasn’t the only game had an impressive offensive output. The New Jersey Nets’ Vince Carter (46 points) and the Hornets’ David West (32 points) combined for 78 points. Guess Vince figured that if he’s going to go out, it might as well be in style. Today at 3:00 p.m. ET marks the deadline for teams to make any trades before the postseason push begins.

3. Shining Sun
Maybe there’s something to this Steve Nash for MV-Three talk after all. As Nash rested a sore shoulder for two weeks, the Suns were outplayed by some of the more miserable teams in the league. By the time Nashty returned, Phoenix had dropped three of four games by a combined 46 points. Since emerging back into the lineup, the Suns have won their last two games by a total of 35 points. Against the Clippers, Nash scored 13 while dishing out 12 assists; he followed that with a 14 point, 13 assist effort against Boston. On a team that is as loaded as the Suns are, it’s pretty amazing that subtracting one player can create such a striking difference in performance. This isn’t like Minnesota losing Kevin Garnett or Kobe Bryant going down on the Lakers. Phoenix has two additional All-Stars in Amare Stoudemire and Shawn Marion on their ultra talented roster. Hell, even Van Halen was able to make some good music after David Lee Roth left.

Wednesday’s Player of the Day: Mike Miller @ Golden State 49 min, 45 pts (FG: 16-27, 3FG: 9-17, FT: -6), 5 reb, 6 ast, 1 stl

Thursday’s Game to Watch: Miami (26-27) @ Dallas (44-9) Everything had been lining up perfectly for an awesome Finals rematch; until last night. Pat Riley’s back, Shaq’s coming off a 20 point, 16 rebound performance, Dallas has put together a nine game win streak and Mark Cuban is taking shots at players’ leadership abilities. But a majority of the luster was removed from this match-up when Dwyane Wade started sobbing like a baby before being wheeled off the court like a geriatric coot at Country Meadows nursing home. However, the emotions should still be high as this young rivalry continues to develop. Unfortunately, without their star, the Heat are facing the difficult task of defeating the best team in the league on their home floor, where they hold a 24-3 record. But as Rudy T once said, “Never underestimate the heart of a champion.”

Buzzer Beater: We all knew that it was going to happen eventually. We all knew that “Dancing With The Stars” would come looking for NBA talent after the NFL’s Jerry Rice and Emmitt Smith showed the world what twinkle toes were all about. But that still doesn’t keep you from scratching your head at the selection. Prepare yourself to witness retired baller Clyde “The Glide” Drexler performing the electric slide in a sailor suit or the two-step dressed in the traditional attire of crotch-hugging Wranglers on NBC’s primetime lineup. Drexler could prove to be Baryshnikov, but does it really matter? At this point, he’s just another sporting icon reduced to reality-show celebrity status. And plus, how much satisfaction can he get by beating a one legged Heather Mills?