all-other-sports
There’s a horrible misconception out there that mixed martial arts is a “bloodsport.” Yeah, yeah, yeah; we know it can be difficult to watch at times for some, but the sport has evolved in recent years. It’s grace, skill, agility and…aw, who are we kidding? We watch it for stuff like this:
If you’re like millions of other Americans then you probably don’t have a single ounce of athletic ability in your entire body. For years you’ve been relegated to the sidelines, participating in sports by being a fan. Well, get off your couch and start stretching your vocal chords because we’ve found a sport than can turn any Average Joe into an icon. And you already know all the rules because you’ve been playing a part in the sport for your entire life and didn’t even know it. No joke!
You know when you go to the game and on the jumbotron they always have a clever rendition of three-card monte? Well, this is kind of like that only when it’s over, instead of feeling stupid for being tricked, you start to feel bad about clipping that cyclist who was in full competition gear last week.
Links:
[College Humor]: Awareness Test
Believe it or not, but yet another football league has gone under. Well, that’s not exactly true because the All American Football League isn’t giving up just yet. The AAFL is being forced to postpone its 2008 opening season until 2009 due to a lack of financial funding.
The league’s chief executive officer, Marcus Katz, said economic conditions forced the decision to scrap plans for this year.
“I invested 29 million dollars in cash to roll out the operations of the league,” Katz told the station, adding he was owed “a lot more money” by a student loan company.
“When I told the board I would subsidize the league, that was before the bond market collapsed,” Katz said.
Say what you will about Vince McMahon’s pathetic XFL, but at least they had an opportunity to prove they sucked on the field.
In other news…
[Can’t Stop the Bleeding]: The NCAA doesn’t like ESPN
[The Big Lead]: Clay Buchholz scores a perfect dame
[ThePittsburghChannel.com]: Billy Crystal, you’re outta here!
[Smarter Sports Blog]: Reporter flips over covering sled race
[CBS4Denver.com]: Barry Bonds alleged use of roids pays off in a big way…just not for him
[The Swim Aids]: Golfers don’t like the idea of random drug tests
[Jibblescribbits]: Is Alexander Ovechkin the lost love child of Andre the Giant? You decide
[Links Link]: It’s been a bad week for John Daly…wait, aren’t all his weeks bad weeks?
America has gone workout crazy. Everyone, everywhere wants to be buff, tan and super sexy nowadays, but what’s the best way to go about getting that ultra hot look? Well, at the Anti-Gym, they figure humiliation will melt those unsightly pounds right off your body.
Now, stop being fat already!!
Links:
[CollegeHumor.com]: Horrific Gym Commercial
[Anti-Gym]: Home
Remember back when LeBron James slam dunked his brand new baby boy during the ESPYs? Well, a bunch of people got all bent out of shape over the skit, saying that tomahawking a newborn somehow shows poor taste. Where are those people when you need `em?
Links:
[CollegeHumor.com]: Pool Basketball
Some might say the story of 101-year-old Buster Martin is an inspiration. We say it makes us wanna puke. It’s not because he’s super old, it’s because he’s super old and he could smoke us in a race. However, we will not be competing against him in the London Marathon in mid-April. We choose not to run.
“I’ve said I’ll attempt it,” Martin told Reuters. “I haven’t said I’ll complete it.”
Martin did run in, and finish, a half-marathon in Essex last Sunday, with his first words at the finish reported to be, “Where’s my beer?”
He plans to celebrate the London Marathon in similar fashion.
“I’ll do what I always do and have a pint and a [cigarette],” Martin told Reuters. “People ask what is my secret, but I haven’t got one. They say [cigarettes] and booze are bad for you, but I’m still here, aren’t I?
Hey, it seems to work for Amy Winehouse and you can’t argue with the results. Martin has produced 17 kids in his century-plus on the planet and he just finished a 13-mile half marathon in a bit over five hours! According to Martin, he could have finished the race with a better time if he didn’t stop for a beer and a smoke!
Links:
[LATimes.com]: At age 101, British runner can get by on fumes
[ABC News]: He’s 101 and Training for Marathon
We know that those who can’t do, play fantasy sports. After all, is there anything more consuming than a fantasy football league? Forget family. Forget work. Forget the bills, well everything but cable and high speed internet connection of course. But it’s not just football anymore. People are addicted to fantasy basketball, fantasy golf, fantasy basketball; it’s becoming an American epidemic. However, those same fantasy freaks would probably scoff at the idea of fantasy fishing. Well, scoff no more because these guys are pulling in fantasy addicts like we reel in old shoes. And they’re using big, big bucks as bait.
Fantasy fishing works like any fantasy league. After signing up at Fantasy Fishing, you draft 10 real anglers (never call them “fishermen”) and accumulate points based on how much bass weight they reel in. Each of six regular-season tournaments awards $100,000 to the highest-scoring participant. The most points in the seventh tournament, the Forrest L. Wood Cup — the league’s “Super Bowl” — also wins $100,000. And the $1 million grand prize goes to the most cumulative points over all seven events, with an astounding $5 million “Top 7 Exacta Bonus” to any owner who picks the top seven finishers, in exact order, in any one event. Oh, and they’re also giving away trucks and ATVs and more. Hey, fantasy leaguers, when was the last time Peyton Manning or Alex Rodriguez won you a friggin’ boat?
Links:
[Salon.com]: Watch people fish. Win $1 million
[FantasyFishing.com]: Win your share of $7.3 million in cash and prizes
There’s really only one way to learn how to pull off a backflip and that’s the hard way.
Last week, we told you about Floyd Mayweather Jr.’s decision to hop into the wrestling ring after breaking the Big Show’s nose in a gimmick. Well, the match is signed and officially official. At Wrestlemania XXIV on March 30, it will be the Big Show and Money Mayweather hooking up at the Citrus Bowl in Orlando. But Floyd doesn’t come cheap. Mayweather will earn a cool $20 million for his night’s work with the WWE. They don’t call him “Money” for nothing.
“I had approached the (WWE) about a year ago but it didn’t fit into our schedule,” said Ellerbee after a news conference at Staples Center. “We sat down with them again about a month ago and they made an incredible offer and me and my business partner Al Heyman sat down with them and we cut the deal. It’s an eight-figure deal worth $20 million just for this one fight.”
Mayweather is 39-0 in the ring, but the wrestling match will have a slightly more skewed tale of the tape than the 5-foot-8, 150-pound boxer is used to. Wight comes into match standing 7 feet tall and weighing 430 pounds.
“I weigh three times as much as he does. It’s not fair, but I’m a businessman and I see an opportunity for business,” said Wight, punctuating his statement by flinging the wooden podium to the floor. …
I’m not just any ordinary fighter,” said Mayweather, who earned about $20 million for his 2007 fight against De La Hoya, which was the richest boxing match ever, generating revenue of $120 million.
“I dance with the stars, I play in NBA celebrity games; you just never know what Floyd Mayweather will do next. Next year I could be playing for an NFL team or an NBA team. You just don’t know.
We don’t know what he’ll do next, but we know it’s going to put gobs of money in his account, whatever it is.
Links:
[SI.com]: Mayweather goes from WBC to WWE
