Indianapolis Colts

Peyton Manning tries to fill Brett Favre’s shoes both on and off the field

Unless you’re talking about the new Madden cover, Brett Favre is long gone from the NFL…for now. Who knows what will come in the months leading up to the season’s kickoff, but No. 4 has not walked through the Packers’ locker room doors yet, meaning the league needs a new, loveable, ol’ dog to talk about the good old days and how the youngsters make him feel like he’s still just kicking up dirt on the playground. As of now it looks like 32-year-old Peyton Manning is that man.

The veteran QB says the rookies sometimes make him feel old.

“It’s hard for me to realize why some of these guys are nervous. As one of them, I can’t remember who it was, they were saying how they like watching me on ESPN Classic. I don’t consider myself to be an ESPN Classic type but when I was a 22-year-old senior at Tennessee these guys were I guess 11 years old. But I do enjoy being around these young guys cause it still is very much a young man’s game and it does kind of keep you feeling young,” said Manning.

You know what else keeps you feeling young at heart? Creepy, licking contests with Eli.


[]: Veteran QB Manning says rookies can make him feel old

Indianapolis Colts

When Peyton says it’s a pass play, it’s a pass play dammit!

It feels like the NFL season has been over for eons now and we’re beginning to get antsy. We thought the Draft might keep us sustained until they finally kickoff, but that didn’t work. Luckily we’ve come across this video of Peyton Manning throwing a hissy-fit and his offensive lineman putting him in check.

See more funny videos at CollegeHumor

One trillion more watches and preseason games will be upon us!

Indianapolis Colts

The karma police were on hand in Indianapolis last week

Maybe it was karma that caused Indianapolis to choke away an AFC title game opportunity on Sunday. After all, the Colts were up 10-7 at halftime of their contest against San Diego last week before the botch. Now, Indy fans are scuttling to find explanations for how they let another epic showdown with New England slip through their fingers, but we say look no further than the halftime entertainment. You basically begged fate to kick you in the balls by booing a little girl.

Fourteen-year-old Anny Grant was the Patriots’ representative in the annual Punt, Pass and Kick competition. And when she was introduced along with the other winners before the fourth quarter of San Diego’s playoff win over the Colts, she was the only one booed by the crowd.

Booing a 14-year-old; shame, shame. You know what they say, karma is a bitch and apparently she works double time to get revenge when a stadium of 56,950 gang up against one little girl. Of course, the New England Patriots were quick to reward Grant for sporting their colors in a hostile environment.

Patriots owner Robert Kraft says she’ll be honored on the field this week before the AFC championship game against the Chargers.

Grant also returned from school and heard a phone message from Andre Tippett, the Patriots’ executive director of community affairs and a former star linebacker. She called back and was ecstatic when Tippett extended the invitation to the game – plus tickets for her, her parents and two brothers.


[]: Patriots to honor young fan booed in Indianapolis

Indianapolis Colts

Boom! Now that’s a tackle!

The Titans won a must-win situation on Sunday night, defeating Indianapolis to secure a playoff spot. But even post season berths took a backseat in this game after Chris Henry was on the wrong end of the collision of the game – nay, the collision of the year.

Sweet mother of pearl! Did anyone get the license plate of that mini van that just ran over Henry?

Indianapolis Colts

Odds and Ends: The ESPYs are coming! The ESPYs are coming!

The ESPY awards are just about three weeks away and the voting has begun for all 38 categories on And surprise, surprise, surprise; everybody’s favorite group of good guys, the Colts, lead the field with six nominations; including Best Team and Best Male Athlete (Peyton Manning). We’d like to see the Super Bowl champs go 0-for-6 on the evening, but that’s like asking Tony Dungy to give an acceptance speech without mentioning the Lord. It just isn’t going to happen.

In other news…

[]: Marion Jones is flat broke.

[USA Today]: Steve Spurrier is already starting the year on the wrong foot.

[Our Book of Scrap]: A cliff and a swinging wire with Dennis Rodman attached. Let the hilarity ensue.

[Dallas News. com]: Bad news Bear gets cut.

[]: Chauncey Billups is officially a free agent, and a popular one at that.

[]: Could a K.G. trade to L.A. keep Kobe in town?

And finally, Kobayashi’s streak of five consecutive July 4 Nathan’s Famous Hot Dog Eating contest could be unexpectedly ending after the master of raw dogging it came down with a nasty case of jaw arthritis. Apparently, Kobayashi attempted to train through the pain and ended up doing more harm than good. With the champ out of the picture, it’s time for America to put their greasy little mark back on the map of competitive eating. C’mon, “Jaws” Chestnut, we’re counting on you.

Indianapolis Colts

Colts Super Bowl Rings are pretty sweet

The Colts ring is pretty sweet if the people who designed it would just shut the hell up about it. It’s a diamond encrusted ring with a blue horseshoe prominent in the middle and it’s nice and simple. That’s probably where the description should end. But of course, here’s owner Jim Irsay on the ring his wife helped design (of course):

There’s obviously some bling. But we wanted it to have some beautiful simplicity and we wanted to feature the horseshoe. The symbol of the horseshoe is so universal, so powerful.

That’s the powerful thing about it,” he said. “In life we use symbols. .. the art of symbols and reminders are part of our culture.

Uhhh what? The horseshoe is a symbol of luck so I guess that’s the most prominent aspect of the Colts’ culture.

Oh and on one side of the ring is “Our Time” and on the other side is “Faith”. Irsay said that faith “gives you the strength to have the perseverance to move forward even after many disappointments.” Of course, the faith thing was probably demanded by Tony Dungy and his in your face Christianity. Stupid Dungy.

Finally, you know exactly where you are in the Colts organization pecking order: players and top execs got the $5,000 ring. Some employees got a scaled down version worth around $2,000. And finally the proles got a third-tier ring that is worth less than the box that the top-tier rings came in.

[USA Today]: Colts receive Super Bowl rings in private ceremony

Indianapolis Colts

Come and get you some Tony Dungy history

Who needs a four bedroom house when this
is gonna be your new crib?

Are you one of those losers who collect odd sports memorabilia? You know who we’re talking about; the type of person who combs eBay continuously looking for Barry Bonds’ used syringes, bloody gauze used on Steve Nash’s gashed nose or grass from the field where Joe Montana took his final snap. C’mon, be honest; we’re all friends here. This crap ain’t buying itself. Well, we just might have your newest worthless piece of memorabilia for you.

The boyhood home of Super Bowl winning coach Tony Dungy is now for sale in Jackson Michigan. Dungy’s sister is selling the four-bedroom home which sheltered Dungy until he left for college for the low, low price of $53,000, which is $6,000 below its value. Are you getting that checkbook out yet? No? Oh, you want more; you greedy little nerds and your collections of crap, always wanting a deal. Okay, well what if an autographed copy of “Quiet Strength” by Tony Dungy was thrown into the deal? Still not enough you say. All right; then how about a football autographed by your favorite Colts player?

Now, deal or no deal?


[]: Colts Coach’s Childhood Home goes up for Sale

Indianapolis Colts

"You are not Peyton Manning"

Some idiot in Illinois bet his friends that his beloved Chicago Bears would win the Super Bowl and if they didn’t he was going to change his name to Peyton Manning. Well, we all know how that went and since the Colts won the big game, Scott Wiese has been in court fighting for his right to humiliate himself.

He claims that the name change represents the passion that he has for da’ Bears and seems to be committed to honoring the bet. But Macon County Circuit Judge Katherine McCarthy saved his ass by ruling that the name change could possibly infringe on the privacy of the real Peyton Manning and that it was just too damn confusing.

Apparently Wiese won’t appeal the ruling but his friends will probably have something to say about their boy skipping out on his promise. We suggest making him wear a Peyton Manning jersey for the next year. Sure, it’s not permanent but it is still pretty embarrassing. Hey that beats having to follow Kenny Chesney on tour for a year.


[]: Judge says man can’t change name to Peyton Manning

Indianapolis Colts

Tony Dungy isn’t anti anything, except the gays

He’s no Tim Hardaway but isn’t Tony Duny basically saying the same thing? During a speech at a fundraising dinner for the Indiana Family Insitute, a group that supports a constitution amendment banning gay marriages, Dungy said, “I appreciate the stance they’re taking, and I embrace that stance.” Dungy is smart enough to couch it as pro-family instead of anti-gay but it’s essentially the same thing.

IFI is saying what the Lord says. You can take that and make your decision on which way you want to be. I’m on the Lord’s side. We’re not anti- anything else. We’re not trying to downgrade anyone else. But we’re trying to promote the family — family values the Lord’s way.

It’s the Lord’s way or the (hershey) highway! Basically Tony Dungy, who thanked all the great fans in Indy after the Super Bowl thinks that the gay ones are evil and will burn in hell. We’re not sure that’s the type of fan appreciation they were looking for.

[Indy Star]: Dungy: ‘I embrace’ same-sex marriage ban
[Out Sports]: Dungy proudly announces opposition to gay marriage

Indianapolis Colts

Peyton Manning on Saturday Night Live

Following in the footsteps of Tom Brady, (isn’t he always following Tom Brady?  Well, except for that supermodels thing…) Peyton Manning will host Saturday Night Live on March 24.  

At first we weren’t so sure about this since Peyton seems like a stiff, but he has done 6,000 commercials and his appearance on David Letterman after the Super Bowl was pretty funny and not cringe inducing even once so maybe he’ll do a good job.  But there’s a big difference between scripted commercials and scripted live comedy as big as SNL.

We wonder if Eli will make a special guest appearance as the fuckup brother.

Here’s Tom Brady’s best sketch from SNL and even he looks a little awkward at times trying not to look at the camera.