The $4,000 tote bag
There should be a law that if someone brings about a lawsuit that is deemed ridiculous by 99% of the country, he/she should be forced to watch Cool as Ice nonstop for the next year. Either that or have to bathe Rosie O’Donnell. And that law should be passed in time for Michael Cohn, a fan that is suing the Angels because he did not receive a Mother’s Day nylon tote bag.
Cohn is bringing a class action lawsuit that alleges that any male or fan under the age of 18 that didn’t receive a tote bag last May is entitled to $4,000 each in damages because they were treated unfairly. Cohn wrote a letter to the team last June and they sent him four tote bags but that wasn’t enough for him. We’re not even going to speculate why he needs a womens tote bag. Perhaps he’ll sue over Angels eyeliner day too.
The team even modified the promotion this year and will give the bags to the first 25,000 fans over the age of 18 but his parasite lawyer says that violates the civil rights of those under 18.
You know what? Watching Cool as Ice or bathing Rosie isn’t enough. These people just need to be shot.
Links:
[AP]: Man denied bag says Angels discriminated
2 replies on “Man sues over Mother’s Day tote bag”
That’s it… — I’m suing the Pittsburgh Pirates for everything I didn’t get over the past 25 years. That includes the stuffed animal Pirate Parrot, that was given out to kids 14 and under (I was 21 or 22), the beer mug to fans 18 and over (I was 12), the flower to all the moms on mother’s day and the hat I was denied because I came in the bottom of the 4th inning hammered, and they had just run out. I need a good lawyer. Anyone wanna take this one? I’m going for $500,000. And you have to take my loyalty to the Pirates as well.
The giants are giving away — tote bags this Sunday. I’m suing them because you have to attend the game to get one. I believe that’s discriminatory against people who don’t want to go to Giants games.