Apparently ESPN gives out awards to honor people who mimic our weekend routine and nobody bothered to tell us about it. But its okay, we’re not bitter. Nope, we’re going to use the news as motivation so that we might crush the 2008 “Ultimate Couch Potato” Jeff Miller, taking our first steps toward destroying the evil empire known as ESPN. Until then, we’re just going to laugh at the pathetic showing of 40.5 consecutive, sleepless hours, staring at television screens while being confined to a Lazy Boy.
The contest was held in the ESPN Zone in New York where Windy City native Miller sat for almost two full days before being declared this year’s champion at 2:30 Thursday morning.
Although I tried to visualize and imagine the conditions and how this competition would play out, I was still unprepared for how difficult the whole thing was. The first 12 to 15 hours are pretty easy because there’s plenty on TV and all the highlights are new, but at 3 a.m. it’s extremely difficult to not fall asleep,” said the 24-year-old Miller.
We’re not trying to toot our own horn here, but did he seriously have to “visualize and imagine the conditions” beforehand? Hell, we haven’t left our couch since the bowl season began sometime in mid-December and we haven’t even broken a sweat yet. And no sleep is not a problem for us; we just get all jacked up on Mountain Dew. Now, if you’ll excuse us, a World Series of Poker marathon is about to get started on the Deuce and we’ve got some training to do.
Links:
[NBC5.com]: 2008 `Couch Potato’ Named Following Competition