The top celebrity fans

There is nothing more deplorable than bandwagon fans (e.g. 95% of Cowboys fans), which is why Jack Nicholson topping this list of celebrity fans from ESPN is particularly despicable.

Nicholson is a fraud who was born and raised in New York City. He should be rooting for the Knicks yet he is the major celebrity face in a town where the only reason celebrities go to games is to be seen. The Lakers getting knocked out of the playoffs early saved us from watching Jim Gray fellate Jack Nicholson at every break.

Before we continue, here is a little rant on bandwagon fans. There is absolutely no reason why anyone should root for a team other than the one that’s closest to their geographic area. So for example, if you were raised in Philly and root for the Dolphins, you should be shot. But if live in Topeka, KS, you should be able to root for any team within driving distance. Bandwagon fans should be rounded up and beaten.

However, there are a few exceptions to this rule.

1. Your father is a die-hard ____ fan and is passing it down.
2. If you move somewhere as a kid, you are allowed to adopt the team of your new city.
3. If you move somewhere as an adult, you can start rooting for a team with no divisional/conference/league if they are absolutely terrible. (The Billy Crystal rule.)
4. If your team moves to another city, you are allowed to make a decision on whether to continue to root for that team or wait till your city gets a team again. (e.g. Baltimore Colts / Ravens)
5. Your favorite player gets traded away and your old team is now dead to you. (Allowed 1 per lifetime.)

Now… back to the celebrities list. Surprisingly, a lot of celebrities have good ties to their teams of choice. Here are some of our favorites:

#2 Spike Lee: Spike is often thought of as the Jack of the East Coast but he was raised in NYC and is a staple at Knicks games even during the past few years while Isiah Thomas ruined the team so he is OK by us.
#5 Ashley Judd: Judd is hot and is a Kentuckian who loves her Wildcats. And we love her.
#8 Billy Crystal: His movies may no longer be funny but Billy gets our vote because he had season tickets to the Clippers when they were the worst team on the planet.
#19 Jerry Seinfeld: Jerry should be higher on this list. As a matter of fact, he probably should be #1. Not only is he a NY native, he calls into sports radio to discuss the Mets.
#21 Drew Carey: No one represents Cleveland like Drew Carey. He set his TV show in a city no one else would and had numerous references to the Browns and Indians.
#25 Will Smith: Big Willy Style grew up in Overbrook (also the name of his production company) and was representing the Eagles, Sixers, and Phillies as far back as his Fresh Prince of Bel-Air days.
#27 Matthew McConaughey: That’s what he loves about these University of Texas girls, man. He gets older, they stay the same age.
#48 Darius Rucker: Made one of the dumbest videos ever where the band played catch with Dan Marino. It had nothing to do with the song. Then we thought about it and realized that if you’re gonna make a shitty video, at least get the chance to play catch with Dan Marino.