Categories
MLB General

Baseball gets juiced


If America’s pastime just isn’t cutting it for you anymore, you should take a look at the latest craze destined to flop all across the nation. And if you thought that the XFL was whack, just wait til you get a load of the NXBL or National Extreme Baseball League.

From what we can tell, it’s basically like having both sides playing at the same time. There are two diamonds, two batters boxes, two pitching mounds and both teams have their traditional fielding positions out on the grass. Pitchers alternate pitches and the fielders only field when their pitcher has thrown to the opposing batter.

This “revolutionary” sport was created in 2006 but the league’s official inaugural season will be in 2008 and we’re sure that the American public is eagerly anticipating the first pitch. And in case you were wondering about the legitimacy of the league, here’s the NXBL’s mission statement.

To serve the public with passion as a quality example of excellence on the field, in the office, and within the community by consistently exceeding our customers’ expectations by demonstrating the highest character, appreciation and respect for our game, customers, teammates and partners as an economical and visionary organization providing a totally unique entertainment experience.

Hey, at least they are pretending that this is an actual sport.

Links:

[N-XBL.com]: National Extreme Baseball League

Categories
Indianapolis Colts

"You are not Peyton Manning"


Some idiot in Illinois bet his friends that his beloved Chicago Bears would win the Super Bowl and if they didn’t he was going to change his name to Peyton Manning. Well, we all know how that went and since the Colts won the big game, Scott Wiese has been in court fighting for his right to humiliate himself.

He claims that the name change represents the passion that he has for da’ Bears and seems to be committed to honoring the bet. But Macon County Circuit Judge Katherine McCarthy saved his ass by ruling that the name change could possibly infringe on the privacy of the real Peyton Manning and that it was just too damn confusing.

Apparently Wiese won’t appeal the ruling but his friends will probably have something to say about their boy skipping out on his promise. We suggest making him wear a Peyton Manning jersey for the next year. Sure, it’s not permanent but it is still pretty embarrassing. Hey that beats having to follow Kenny Chesney on tour for a year.

Links:

[WishTV.com]: Judge says man can’t change name to Peyton Manning

Categories
All Other Sports

Eddie Griffin should stick to comedy

Everyone is use to seeing cars crashing into the wall as they make hundreds of left turns while zipping around the racetrack. Something you don’t see at most races is a rare Ferrari Enzo slamming into a barricade. But, then again, comedian Eddie Griffin usually isn’t behind the wheel on the oval either.

Griffin was driving the $1.5 million machine at the Irwindale Speedway in order to practice for an upcoming charity race to promote his latest movie “Redline.” Apparently the car had just a wee bit too much power for Griffin and as he came out of a turn he lost control and smashed the front end of the car into the wall, damaging the expensive automobile beyond repair. However, unlike the basketball player who shares his name, Griffin was not watching porn at the time of the crash.

Daniel Sadek is the executive producer of “Redline” and the owner of what use to be one of only 400 Enzos ever produced. Sadek said that he had “mixed feelings” about the incident.

I’m glad Eddie came out of the crash OK, but my dream car got destroyed,” Sadek said. “I went to my trailer for about 15 minutes and I thought, there’s people dying every day. A lot of worse things are happening in the world.

OK, keep telling yourself that, but we know that you really want to wrap your hands around Griffin’s throat and squeeze until his head pops off.

Links:

[DailyMail.com]: Comedian crashes $1.5 million Ferrari
[Jalopnik]: Another Enzo bites the dust, this time with Eddie Griffin at the wheel