Category: All Other Sports

all-other-sports

Categories
All Other Sports

Follow the bouncing balls

You might only know Rolling Rock for green bottled beer but apparently they’ve jumped on the advertising bandwagon and put themselves together a commercial. And it’s a pretty darn funny one too. Now, it’s not a pair of hot babes wrestling around in their underwear or the Trojan Games but you can never go wrong with a perfectly placed, good ol’ fashioned baseball to the package. So, if once is funny then a whole slew of crotch shots is well on its way to hilarity.

The Magic should have forced Billy Donovan to spend his off-season hanging out at this stadium during every game in order to weasel out of his contract. Hey, and that’s pretty easy Billy; they really ought to ferret leg your ass.

Links:

[Our Book of Scrap]: Something To Wake You Out of Your “Gary Sheffield Is Still An Idiot” Fog

Categories
All Other Sports

Former Rugby player punches man for calling him a poof

Proving once again that women might be the bane of every man’s existence, a former Australian rugby player was put on two years probation after punching a man for calling him a poof. Meli Allen was wearing a purple cashmere sweater because his girlfriend had bought it for him and he didn’t want to offend her.

Allen claimed that he punched Ryan Phillpot last November because one of his friends said, “You poof, you f$@king fag,” to Allen. When Allen approached them, they continued to insult them so he punched one of them in the nose.

The beauty of this news item is that it gives us the opportunity to post one of our favorite segments from Arrested Development, the greatest short-lived show on television.

[News.com.au]: Ex-footy player punched man over jumper

Categories
All Other Sports

Odds and Ends: Another sports meets rap disaster

Just the other day we were sitting around talking about the history of sports but a funny thing happened when our timeline hit the late 60’s. Turns out we couldn’t remember a damn thing about the world of athletics from 1965-1969. Thank goodness for a couple of Eminem wannabes doing a lame history project and YouTube. And, of course, we gotta give a shout out to the good fellas at You Been Blinded for dropping this knowledge bomb on our noggin. We promise to never forget the late 60’s again, but there’s no such guarantee for the late 90’s. Way too many dollar beer nights!

In other news…

[Golf.com]: Tiger Woods wins this golf tournament too

[SportsbyBrooks]: A-Rod likes to swing and we’re not talking bats, folks

[BostonHerald.com]: Soccer fans get crushed in Zambia

[The Golf Blog]: Is Phil really “Just Like Us”?

[YouTube]: Cubs are already self-destructing

And finally, how big of a Penn State football are you? Well if you’re gonna be the most diehard Nittany Lions fan on the planet then you gotta get your hands on the PSU motorcycle up for grabs on eBay. And all it’ll cost you to have this one of a kind hog is $60,000 if you act fast.

Categories
All Other Sports

First Liddell, now Johnnie Morton. Are there any MMA heroes left?

Last week, we brought you the story of football player turned MMA wannabe Johnnie Morton and his upcoming first fight at K-1’s Dynamite!! USA.  Well, it looks like Morton’s first bout as a “professional” fighter could very well be his last after Bernard Ackah knocked him the heck out in just 38 seconds with a huge punch to the kisser.

Morton ended up being all right after he was taken to the hospital but K-1 wasn’t done delivering blows to the fallen NFLer.  Johnnie received a suspension from the fight club because he refused to take a drug test.  Man, drugs sure aren’t what they used to be if he was using `cause that was a pathetic display; even for a possibly doped up rookie.  Hopefully, this will be a wakeup call to anyone who thinks they are big enough, strong enough, fast enough or tough enough to just step into the ring with an MMA fighter; these guys are serious athletes and they have no remorse about putting guys on stretchers.  

Links:

[SI.com]: Morton KO’d, suspended
[Steroid Nation]: Former NFL’er Johnny Morton knocked cold in ring. Now the bad news: Morton stiffed too

Categories
All Other Sports

Could an out of work NFL receiver be the next MMA superstar? Oh, hell no!



There is no way this douche wins,
right?

Just when the UFC was starting to get the mainstream love that could help MMA KO boxing once and for all, Chuck Liddell went out and took the sport back about 10 years when he took a nice little nap in the center of the octagon thanks to some well placed punches by Quinton Jackson. And in less than two minutes the opportunity of a lifetime was gone and the chance to exploit some serious fight hype coming off a snoozefest between Oscar De La Hoya and Floyd Mayweather had vanished. And when Dana White’s golden boy lost his title, the giant that is MMA was decapitated. Well, there is the new UFC light heavyweight champion, but we don’t think anyone wants Rampage and his “humongous dick and big balls” leading the troops.

So where does mixed martial arts turn to find the new blood that can pick up the combat sport and thrust it back into the limelight where it belongs? Johnnie Morton, of course.

I am 0-0, underground, amateur and pro. Zero experience,” said Morton

OK, so maybe MMA shouldn’t look to the former 49er/Lion/Chief to be their savior just yet but he could bring back some interest in the sport when he hooks up with Bernard Ackah on June 2 at K-1’s Dynamite!! USA. C’mon, who wouldn’t pay to see Morton get Tai Kwon Do’d right into la-la land. Oh, and the fun doesn’t end there because the card has not just one, but two gimmicky fights to its credit!

In addition to wasting your hard earned cash to see Morton participate in his first professional fight, you can also throw away your “making it rain” money by watching former WWE Champion Brock Lesnar in his debut bout against Min Soo Kim. But don’t get your hopes all worked up over the dream match of Lesnar/Kim just yet. While we know that Lesnar, aka “The Next Big Thing,” will be fighting, it is unsure who his opponent will be since his original opponent was denied a California fighter’s license.

This sounds like a spectacular event being put on by UFC’s rival, K-1, but here’s a little word of advice for your next big promotion. Perhaps you should get professional fighters to step inside the ring for you instead of guys who are just looking for something cool to pass the time.

I know there are other things to do, like maybe surf, golf and do things on TV, which I probably will in the future,” said Morton. “But right now, because I am still athletic, and I am still young enough to do this, this is just something I want to try in life and explore and experience. It is something I have always been interested in. At least, when I am old I can say I tried or I did it.

Links:

[MiamiHerald.com]: Former NFL receiver Morton to compete in first MMA event Saturday

Categories
All Other Sports

Oh, and you think you could spell "aniseikonia" ?!?

Now, we don’t usually bring you news from the world of spelling but, as you could probably tell by the interruption of your normal ABC broadcasting, the 2007 Scripps National Spelling Bee went down on Thursday…and we have a new champion, baby! Evan O’Dorney, 13, spelled “serrefine” without any problems to cap off a consonant and vowel filled tournament and won $35,000, plus a $5,000 scholarship and a $2,500 saving bond. Not a bad day’s haul if you ask us.

But it wasn’t all smiles at the bee as many casualties were left in O’Dorney’s path to the trophy, including Samir Patel, who many considered to be the favorite before the event. But the teary-eyed little nerd sealed his own fate last week when he compared not winning the alphabet bowl to “Dan Marino not winning the Super Bowl.” After he said that, Samir was doomed to misspell something simple like “clevis.”

Samir wiped away tears as he talked about his gaffe.

“The first thing I thought was c-l-e-v-i-s, and if I had been slow and cautious like I always am, I would have got it right,” he said. “But I just outsmarted myself. It was an easy word. I just made a stupid mistake.

But, hey, dry those tears baby boy; you’re the Dan Marino of spelling. That’s something to be proud of. It’s not as impressive as winning the big one, but it’s not bad. And you made ESPN’s “Best of the Bee,” so that’s pretty cool, huh?

Well, you did get outshined by the Napoleon Dynamite kid and that boy that fainted definitely showed more heart than you did. Hmmm, well you can spell really well and nobody can take that from you. You just can’t spell as good as this spastic little girl.

Links:

[Examiner.com]: Boy Wins Spelling Bee With `Serrefine’

Categories
All Other Sports

Catching a wheel of cheese is tougher than it sounds

Of all the ridiculous things that happened over this Memorial Day weekend, the Cooper’s Hill Cheese Rolling and Wake was perhaps the weirdest. The tradition of racing down a hill after a Double Gloucester cheese seems to date back as far as 200 years ago. While nobody ever catches up to the cheese, the person who crosses the finish line first… gets the cheese.

Of course, the whole purposes of the event is not to win the cheese but to watch a bunch of people falling down a hill. The event attracted about 3,000 people, mostly spectators, but dozens still ran/rolled down after the cheese.

Links:

[BBC]: Cheese-rolling race winners’ joy

Categories
All Other Sports

Stokkemania has officially arrived!



Hey, you stalkers! Don’t screw this up
for the rest of us!

Because of their super-duper hot daughter, Allison, the Stokke family is getting a taste of what it’s like to be a celebrity. And frankly, they say it tastes like crap.

Thanks to creepy bloggers from all over the world, ourselves included, the high school pole vaulter has, well, vaulted up the charts in search engines and become one of the most talked about subjects in the blogosphere. In fact, she has blown up to Washington Post status as the news juggernaut published an article on the 18-year-old’s new found fame. In addition to school work and track endeavors, Stokke must now put up with paparazzi, bikini photo request, potential stalkers, nasty blogs and fake Facebook profiles.

Even if none of it is illegal, it just all feels really demeaning,” Allison Stokke said. “I worked so hard for pole vaulting and all this other stuff, and it’s almost like that doesn’t matter. Nobody sees that. Nobody really sees me.

Hey, we can totally understand how hard this has to be for a young girl. Suddenly being thrust into a world where you are being objectified by millions for no other reason than simply walking the earth. It really isn’t fair…but, she better get use to it. The snowball has already begun rolling and now it’s just going to continue growing until the public gets their fill of Stokke. Which will probably be around age 50! But who knows, maybe she is just an overnight sensation who will disappear as quickly as she showed up; doubtful but possible.

In the end, as long as nobody gets carried away and does anything against the law, this is simply a case of boys being boys. Her own mother even said so:

All of it is like locker room talk,” said Cindy Stokke, Allison’s mom. “This kind of stuff has been going on for years. But now, locker room talk is just out there in the public. And all of us can read it, even her mother.

We’re just hoping that Allison can adapt to her sudden and uncomfortable celebrity without too much stress and that her “fans” can distinguish between right and wrong as they admire their teenage heartthrob.

Links:

[WashingtonPost.com]: Teen Tests Internet’s Lewd Track Record

Categories
All Other Sports

Korea’s former HR king shows his appreciation by dropping his pants for fans


If you thought that the Red Sox players who wore stained socks recently to tribute their star pitcher Curt Schilling were acting stupid, just wait until you get a load of what Lee Man-soo has done.

Man-soo is the former homerun champ in Korea and recently guaranteed that he would run around Manhak Stadium in his boxers if the home team could manage to sell out a game. On Saturday, Man-soo, aka “Hulk”, made good on his promise and humiliated himself in front of 30,400 spectators.

In one of the most unusual moments in Korean baseball history, Lee, 49, now a coach for the first-place SK Wyverns, stepped out of the dugout after the fifth inning _ stripped down to his under-shorts attached with fake buttocks, socks and cleats _ and jogged toward the outfield followed by 20 members of the team’s official fan club.

The bizarre parade continued for about four minutes, with Lee slowly circling the stadium waving his hands to the deafening applause and laughter from the sellout crowd. His face hinted at a mixed sense of amusement and embarrassment.

We’re hoping that this kind of enthusiasm will rub off on the big league bores we have here in the States. Who knows, maybe this will inspire Barry Bonds to strip naked while running the bases after hitting that record breaking long ball. Call us crazy, but we think that Bud Selig and Hank Aaron just might show up for that.

Links:

[OttawaCitizen.com]: Koreans flock to see baseball’s `Hulk’ fill out underpants
[The Korea Times]: Ex-Homer Champ Runs Around in Shorts

Categories
All Other Sports

Countdown to UFC 71: Chuck Liddell vs. Quinton Jackson


The UFC spent a whole lot of money to pry Quinton “Rampage” Jackson away from Japan’s PRIDE Fighting
Championships and now it’s time for Jackson to earn his money and show off his skills in front of an American audience as he competes for the world light heavyweight belt against “The Iceman” Chuck Liddell.

Rampage has been making his living overseas for some time now and he has built up a Godzilla-sized reputation as one of the baddest men in the world when inside the ring with a 26-6 record that includes 12 victories determined by either KO or TKO. One of his most notable wins came against The Iceman back in 2003 when Jackson threw him hard to the mat and unleashed a barrage of punches that caused Liddell’s corner to throw in the towel. That was the last time that Liddell lost a match.

Since getting pummeled in Tokyo, The Iceman (20-3) has ripped off seven straight victories, won the light heavyweight championship and avenged two (Randy Couture and Jeremy Horn) of his three career losses. Oh, and he whopped some guy named Tito Ortiz’s ass…twice! The only measure of professional revenge that Liddell lacks is a victory over Rampage.

Jackson loves to get a hold of his opponents and slam `em on their heads but Liddell has such an excellent defense against the takedown that this will probably turn into a Liddell/ Ortiz style of stand-up fight. And since both of these guys have tremendous power in their hands and chins made of concrete, nobody will complain about an all out slugfest.

Unlike the debacle that was Oscar De La Hoya and Floyd Mayweather, this fight will be exciting. The Iceman always puts on a show for the fans and he almost never lets the judges decide his fights; in fact, it has been nearly five years since one of his bouts went to the cards. We love Rampage’s entertaining style, both in and out of the octagon, but he doesn’t always perform to his best against the elite competition; just look what happened against Wanderlei Silva (twice) and Mauricio “Shogun” Rua. Liddell is on top of his game right now and not even a monster of a man like Jackson is going to knock him off his MMA throne.

Prediction: Liddell wins by TKO

The weigh-in will be broadcast live on ESPNews at 3:50pm PT/6:50pm ET on Friday

Links:

[UFC.com]: UFC 71: Liddell vs. Jackson