Categories
General Sports

Odds and Ends for Friday Apr 7 2006: Bonds greeted with standing ovation

We were wondering how Giants fans would react in Barry’s first home game. It seems that most of them either think he didn’t use steroids or don’t care. Bonds got a standing ovation as he stepped into the batters box for the first time at AT&T Park. One person even held up a sign that said “Keep Barry – Trade the media*”

In other news…

[NY Daily News]: Knicks bring up 6-5 shooting guard Ime Udoka from the NBDL. “He’s one Knick who hasn’t quit yet on Larry Brown.”

[Star-Telegram]: One more reason to skip Benchwarmers: Sean Salisbury is in it.

[MSNBC]: Honest Jagr turns down record-breaking 53rd goal. “I didn’t touch it and it wasn’t my goal.”

[6-4-2]: Gagne to have second elbow surgery. Fantasy owners are kicking themselves right now.

Categories
Satire

The Sports Satire Roundup for Friday Apr 7 2006

The Duke lacrosse rape scandal is no laughing matter… unless of course it is a laughing matter. This is what I love about satire sites, they’ll cross any line.

[The Brushback]: Pro-Rape Activists Stage Counter Demonstration On Duke Campus

[The Onion]: Duke University Equestrian Team Hoping To Avoid Investigation Into Their Sex Scandal. “We’ve done nothing wrong, veterinarians will find no evidence—DNA or otherwise—showing that horses have been assaulted, and of course no charges have been filed.”

[Sports Pickle]: Brett Favre issued an ultimatum to the Green Bay Packers today, saying he won’t return to the team unless they show they are dedicated to making a playoff run by improving the team’s vastly underperforming quarterback position.

[Sportsgoons]: Barry Bonds is annoying management and teammates by reporting daily on every detail of ESPN reporter Pedro Gomez’s life.

[The Log Ride]: Johnny Damon Vows to Grow Uni-brow in Protest of Facial Hair Policy

Categories
Philadelphia Phillies

Jimmy Rollins’ streak ends at 38


Big money, big money, no whammies, no whammies… goddammit, double whammy for the Phillies as the Fightins drop 3 straight to start the season and J-Roll goes 0-4 to end his hitting streak at 38, miles away from Joe Dimaggio. We didn’t think Jimmy would get to 56 but we thought he’d make it interesting and get somewhere in the 40s. It was also a welcome respite from the endless steroids stories.

Rollins said all the right things in his post-game conference (“It’s more disappointing that we lost.” ; “I’ve always said I’d trade in the streak for a win. Unfortunately, the streak ended and we lost anyway.”) but you know he was mighty disappointed not to be able to keep chasing the unbreakable baseball record.

Here’s some reaction from around the blogosphere:

[The Sports Pulse]:
“The streak is over and I’m sad to see it end. I was rooting not only for the streak but for Jimmy Rollins who has quietly become on the best shortstops in the game. I can root for a guy who plays hard and want to be the best without coming off as arrogant.”

[Phillies Nation]: “As we’ve seen in the slew of interviews leading up to the season, J-Roll thoroughly enjoys the spotlight and relishes in the pressure to get hits and get on base. However, in this opinion he’s borderline selfish. He should be up there helping out his teammates batting behind him by taking pitches, drawing walks, fouling balls off, and in general tiring the opposing pitcher and exposing his stuff. There’s a slim chance that with the attention off him for a while he’ll start thinking more along these lines, but again, those chances are indeed slim.”

[Peter on All]: “Jimmy Rollins’ streak is over, but sincere congratulations go out to him for a job well done. There will be no controversy that a two season hitting streak is a valid one. For the record, I think that what he accomplished, having a whole off-season between at-bats, is much tougher than a single season mark.”

Links:
[Baseball Musings]: Game by game stats for Rollins’ streak
[Philly.com]: Streakin’ backward

Categories
Golf

Tom Lehman’s Escalade gets shot up



Happy to be 4 over

Apparently, Troy Willis Smith isn’t happy that Tom Lehman is the captain of the U.S. Ryder Cup. Either that or he had money on the field and is picking off the top golfers one by one.

Lehman was driving to pick up his wife and kids on the Bobby Jones Expressway when his courtesy car (by the way, Cadillac Escalade is the Masters courtesy car? Nice.) was shot at and the bullet was lodged in the backseat. Lehman said that’s where his 3-year-old boy would normally be strapped in.


I think the guy was full of Jack Daniels and had a bad
day of work. You just have to shake your head and wonder what people are doing.

We’ve been loaded with Jack Daniels and had plenty of bad days at work. But we don’t go around shooting up people on highways.

Links:
[Sun Sentinal]: Shooting gives Lehman new outlook on life, golf

Categories
General Sports

More on the Dateline NASCAR sting



NASCAR fans in their natural environment

Yesterday, we discussed NBC Dateline’s attempt to stage the news by recruiting some muslims to attend a NASCAR event with hidden cameras and seeing what kind of reaction they get from the crowd. Of course, NBC is hoping for something newsworthy like a race riot so they can up their ratings.

It turns out that one “sting” has already happened and the NBC crew was on site in Martinsville Virginia. However, it must not have gone to their liking as they are scheduled to be filming at the Texas Motor Speedway on 4/9. Texas Motor Speedway is a much larger track that the Martinsville Speedway so Dateline is increasing their odds of a confrontation happening.

We assume that at least some NASCAR fans can read and that they have heard about this sting. If NASCAR fans know that NBC/Dateline is baiting them, will there be any incidents? NASCAR communications exec is headed to Texas this weekend and had this to say about NBC:


This is outrageous for a news organization with the reputation of NBC to stoop to the
level of attempting to create news instead of reporting it. Any legitimate journalist should be ashamed.

Look, we joke a lot about NASCAR fans being a bunch of rednecks but could you imagine the outrage if Dateline did this with any minority group? We can’t wait for this episode of Dateline to air. It’s going to be a great view into how you can stage the news if you have enough resources. You know, much like how ESPN molds sports news to their liking.

By the way, this story has us surfing way too many political blogs. We prefer to play only in the sports world and get our news from the Daily Show.

Links:
[Michelle Malkin]: ALL THE NEWS THAT’S FIT TO STAGE
[Michelle Malkin]: NASCAR SMACKS DOWN NBC

Categories
Golf

2006 Masters are underway

Rod Pamping, Lucas Glover, and Olin Browne (who are three golfers we’ve never heard of, Alex?) have just teed off and we’re underway.

I’m not sure that the 2006 Masters can possibly live up to 2005 and Tiger’s incredible shot on the 16th (video below) but like CBS reminds us, it’s a tradition unlike any other so we have to watch.

Oh, and in case you needed to ask, Tiger is the favorite to win it at 9/5 odds. Here are some notable players and their current odds:

Ernie Els: 9/1
Phil Mickelson: 9/2
Vijay Singh: 12/1
Retief Goosen: 17/2
Sergio Garcia: 23/1
Chris DiMarco: 23/1
Davis Love III: 36/1
Jose Maria Olazabal: 24/1
Mike Weir: 43/1
John Daly: 130/1
Stephen Ames: 80/1

It’s too bad you can’t bet someone to place or show at the Masters. We’re not sure it’s smart to bet against Tiger Woods.

Categories
General Sports

Odds and Ends for Thurs Apr 6 2006: Shawn Kemp attempting a comeback

Our favorite fat man with the record for most illegitimate kids in the NBA is attempting a comeback. He’s working out for the Dallas Mavericks today who need a backup to Dirk Nowitzki. Kemp is reportedly down to 270 lbs from his high of 320lbs so he must be serious. It’s hard for a fat guy to give up Krispy Kreme — just ask Charles Barkley.

In other news…

[Detroit Bad Boys]: There’s a Ben Wallace blow up doll. Scary.

[Philly.com]: Donovan McNabb and Jeremiah trotter have to pay handicap-spot violation fines.

[Twincities.com]: Doc Gooden chooses prison over rehab.

[BillyStyle.com]: Stephen A. Smith is literally an idiot. (But you already knew that.)

Finally, we have this screen grab from Yay Sports which explains how the Pacers could lose so many games this season.

Categories
All Other Sports

Duke lacrosse scandal update: player previously arrested for assault


Most people defending the Duke lacrosse players (and there are very few of them) are quick to point out that despite prior charges for 15 players, they were all for just drinking and disruptive behavior. Well it turns out that’s not completely true.

Collin Finnerty and two lacrosse players from other schools were arrested in November for attacking a man in Washington D.C.

A man said he was minding his own business when the three men started picking on him. The man told them to stop “calling him gay and … derogatory names.” Then they attacked him, he said, “busting his lip and bruising his chin,” court records say.

Lacrosse players claim they get a bad reputation but so far, in court documents, members of the Duke lacrosse team have been shown to be racist and homophobic — we’ll reserve judgement on the raping and accessory to a crime.

[News&Observer]: Player in tussle in D.C

Categories
New York Knicks

Larry Brown says it’s either them or me


Larry Brown says that certain members of the team have quit on him, that he’s tired of “begging guys to compete”, and that over the summer, James Dolan and Isiah Thomas have to figure out whether to keep those players or him. Is there any question that he’s talking about Stephon Marbury?


I’ve been doing this forever. I haven’t had trouble getting guys to respond. Ever. You bang heads for a little while. But eventually they get better. I’ve never had a problem like this before. I’ve never heard anyone ever tell me my teams didn’t play hard.

The only problem is how can Isiah (who hasn’t exactly pulled off any smart trades in his tenure) going to get rid of Marbury and his salary? LB says he won’t quit but we don’t see how this is going to end up other than Brown handing in his resignation.

On a related related note, Brown criticized rookie Nate Robinson for showboating and Robinson responded by taking only 1 shot in 27 minutes against the Wizards. Who the hell is Nate Robinson? I realize he won stole the NBA dunk competition this year but he’s not Kobe Bryant. When he wins 3 national champ, he can refuse to shoot.

Links:
[NY Daily News]: LARRY WANTS QUITTERS OUT
[MSNBC]: Knicks’ Brown admits he could be fired
[ESPN]: Thanks, Larry, for the worst season in Knicks history

Categories
MLB General

2006 MLB Payrolls are up 9 percent

While the Yankees lowered their payroll from 2005 (how could they possibly have gone up?) the gap between top and bottom spending teams have closed. However, we still have bottom dwellers like the Florida Marlins who are spending 8% of what the Yankees are spending this year and trail the second lowest, the Devil Rays, by $20M.

The Blue Jays did a lot of shopping in the offseason and lead the league in biggest increase, jumping 57% to $72M. Toronto fans can’t complain about management not attempting to win.

Here are the opening day payrolls for all 30 MLB teams.

Rank Team 2006 Payroll
1 Yankees $198,662,180
2 Red Sox $120,100,524
3 Angels $103,625,333
4 White Sox $102,875,667
5 Mets $100,901,085
6 Dodgers $99,176,950
7 Cubs $94,841,167
8 Astros $92,551,503
9 Braves $92,461,852
10 Giants $90,862,063
11 Cardinals $88,441,218
12 Mariners $88,324,500
13 Phillies $88,273,333
14 Tigers $82,302,069
15 Orioles $72,585,713
16 Blue Jays $71,915,000
17 Padres $69,725,179
18 Rangers $65,468,130
19 Twins $63,810,048
20 Nationals $63,267,500
21 A’s $62,322,054
22 Reds $59,489,015
23 Diamondbacks $59,221,226
24 Indians $56,795,867
25 Brewers $56,790,000
26 Royals $47,294,000
27 Pirates $40,234,833
28 Rockies $41,133,000
29 Devil Rays $35,417,967
30 Marlins $14,998,500