Categories
Miami Dolphins

Odds and Ends for Mon May 29 2006: Ricky joins the Argos

Continuing with our Canadian and Miami theme today, Ricky Williams practiced with his new CFL team, the Toronto Argonauts today. It might be a holiday for those of us in the States but they’re working hard in Canada and so is Ricky Williams. The Canadian Press is reporting that Ricky is in great shape and showed excellent speed. The Argos are only paying him $240,000 CDN… The minimum rookie salary in the NFL is $275,00 US. Poor Ricky. Literally.

In other news…

[ESPN]: RIP Craig “Ironhead” Heyward

[Yahoo]: Radio mic goes dead exactly when Bonds hits 715

[MSNBC]: Beer is good! Fan waiting in line has Bonds #715 ball drop into his hands

[Sports Hooligan]: Iraqi Tennis Coach and Players Killed for Wearing Shorts

Categories
Edmonton Oilers

You call that a hockey riot, Edmonton?

After the Oilers won the Western Conference on Saturday, 30,000 to 50,000 fans gathered on Whyte Avenue to celebrate the ol’ fashioned way. Forget shots on goal and penalty minutes, here are the important stats of the night.


15: people arrested

9: fires set with garbage, pallets, etc.

2: phone booths uprooted and destroyed

2: lights ripped apart atop a 30-foot tall light standard

1: man who urinated in crowd

1: man who fell from a guy wire

1: woman who broke her ankle

Only 15 people arrested, 9 fires set, and 1 urination? Are you kidding me? In Detroit, they set people on fire and then urinate on them to put it out. You’ve got a long way to go, Oilers fans. Perhaps you want to study this instructional video from soccer hooligans, the kings of rioting.

It just might be a warmup for the Stanley Cup so we’ll cut em some slack here. It seems the Edmonton police need some practice too.


Police kept their distance. One officer, leaning on his bicycle and watching the edge of the crowd, said he and his colleagues would be crazy to wade in. It’s not worth it. We don’t want to die.

Good luck in the Final Round, Edmonton.

Links:
[Edmonton Journal]: Hockey hooligans rampage on Whyte

[Winnipeg Sun]: Oiler fan turmoil

Categories
Pittsburgh Steelers

Miami Vice Part 2: It’s 3:30 AM, do you know where Santonio Holmes is?



Busted!

Santonio, Santonio, Santonio… disrupting traffic, yelling profanities at a police officer, getting arrested at 3:30 AM in the morning? We can forgive all of that. Hey, you were in Miami after all. But lying to your mother? FOR SHAME!

When Patricia Brown, Holmes’ mother was told of his arrest, she said it must have been mistaken identity.


That’s news to me. I talked to him yesterday. He’s in Ohio.

We’ve all told our parents were were “at school” when we were really in an undisclosed location with some strippers, a pony keg, and an inflatable Ben Wallace doll, but we didn’t end up getting arrested by the police either. But stick to your “I was in Ohio” story, Santonio. We all know the Miami police is trying to frame you.

Links:

[Pittsburgh Post-Gazette]: Steelers top pick Holmes arrested

Categories
Washington Wizards

Miami Vice Part 1: Gilbert is a basketball player dammit

What is it about Miami that has everyone getting arrested or robbed? (Dhani Jones, Jason Taylor, Jerome McDougal.) It’s safe to say that if you’re a professional athlete, just stay away from Miami. We understand the Miami Heat dancers are the hottest in the league but it’s probably better to just fly them to you.

On Saturday, Gilbert Arenas was arrested along with teammate Awvee Storey (who?) and charged, respectively, for resisting without violence and failure to obey a command. However, the arresting officer will probably be disciplined because he didn’t understand the rules in Gilbert Arenas’ universe.


You can’t arrest me. I’m a basketball player. I play for the Washington Wizards, and I’m not going to leave my teammate.

Ironically, just a few years ago, playing for the Wizards itself was grounds for arrest.

Links:
[Yahoo]: Arenas, Storey arrested on South Beach

Categories
MLB General

Full Count for Mon May 29 2006: The HRs ESPN didn’t cover this weekend

1. Game of the Year: Possibly the most entertaining game of the season took place on Sunday when the Atlanta Braves faced the Chicago Cubs. The Braves set a club record with 8 team homeruns, including two by both Edgar Renteria and Adam LaRoache. They scored six runs in the first two innings to knock out first time Cubs starter Jae Ryu. Braves starter John Smoltz lasted six innings, but he gave up six runs as well. The Braves were leading 12-8 going into the 9th inning, but when Chris Reitsma is in the game it’s never over. He allowed 3 hits and 2 runs in the inning, in addition to two runs allowed by Lance Cormier. The game went to extras, where an error by Aramis Ramirez in the 11th cost the Cubs the game. Ramirez was under the infield popup, but was unable to make the grab, resulting in Ryan Langerhans making it to second. Marcus Giles drove him in, and the Braves won this battle to sweep the series. Braves reliever Oscar Villarreal won the game to improve to 7-0 on the year, and if he keeps this marvelous pace he will become the first 20-win reliever in history. The Braves have now overtaken the Phillies in the NL East, and are now only 3.5 back of the Mets for the division lead.

2. The power surge continues: The homers weren’t reserved for Wrigley Field alone yesterday. Petco Park, widely believed to be the most pitcher-friendly park in the majors, was the site of 3 of the longest 4 homeruns in its history. Though Jake Peavy and Mark Mulder were pitching for San Diego and St. Louis, this was anything but a pitcher’s duel. Mulder gave up eight runs, and Peavy six as the offenses dominated. San Diego’s Mark Bellhorn hit a 438-foot shot, believed to be the longest in park history. Albert Pujols became #2 with a 436 foot blast, his 24th of the season. And one of Josh Bard’s two homers tied the previous Petco record of 434 feet. The Padres won the game 10-8, and are in a three-way tie for 3rd in the NL West division.

3. New York State of Mind: Orlando “El Duque” Hernandez has seen his share of major league teams in recent years. He has bounced around from the Yankees to the White Sox to the Diamondbacks, and now he’s with the Mets. In his first start with the team he pitched five innings and allowed three runs, but that was good enough for the victory against the atrocious Marlins. Carlos Beltran helped power the Mets offense with his 14th homerun. Beltran has been on fire recently and has hit 10 round trippers in May alone. The Mets won 7-3 to achieve their 30th victory of the season, while the Marlins have half of that total.

4. No one cares about 715: Barry Bonds finally hit his 715th homerun yesterday against Colorado, but nobody outside of San Francisco really cared. The serious overhype of Bonds by ESPN in addition to his completely untrustworthy, self-serving personality contributed to 715 becoming just another story. This is completely unlike Hank Aaron’s 715, as most sports fans can remember where they were when Hank broke the record. But every sports fan has tired out of the Bonds story, as he has taken more than a week to hit each of his last two homers. Outside of the 42,935 people that packed AT&T Park yesterday, true baseball fans care more about other stories than Barry Bonds’ homerun total. So now Bonds is 40 behind Hank Aaron’s 755, but can he break that? Unless he goes to an AL team where he can DH, the answer to that question is no.

5. Let’s go to extras: The unanticipated Houston-Pittsburgh series ended up giving us two very entertaining games. Saturday’s matchup went an incredible 18 innings, and Sunday’s contest went to extras too. Down 4-0 in the 9th, the Astros rallied to tie the game. Then, in the 10th, Preston Wilson finally ended the game and the series with an RBI single. The combined time of these last two games was 8 hours and 54 minutes.

Categories
College Basketball

Bye-bye phone for Kelvin

Because Kelvin Sampson couldn’t stop using the phone at Oklahoma, the NCAA has banned Kelvin Sampson from taking any recruiting trips or making phone calls for one year. We’re not talking about a handful of impermissible calls. We’re talking 577 of them.

Even though Sampson won’t be taking any trips soon, he is lucky to have a job. There was a clause in his contract with IU that they could fire him without pay if the NCAA sanctions were tougher than the ones OU self imposed. Sampson says that he “learned an invaluable lesson” — just text message!

This is how the phone call from the NCAA to Kelvin Sampson informing him of the punishment should have gone.

Bye-bye, phone, for Kelvin.

No more phone for you. Your phone privileges are cut off.

I’m gonna write that down and put it on the fridge.

That’s the new rules in the house. I’m gonna take the old rules off
and put new rules up.

You gonna listen to me when I tell you to do something.

We gonna put new rules up.
We gonna put rules up. Rules up.

Rules. Rules.

One, ‘Kelvin cannot use the phone.’
Two, ‘Kelvin cannot… ‘

Since you’re such a smart motherfucker, you can’t go outside anymore either.

Cannot go outside ever again.

Now, put the rules up, Kelvin. You abide by my rules and my regulations, goddamn it. And the rules say ‘No phone and no outside.’

And I don’t give a fuck if the motherfucking house is burning down. If I come home and a fireman putting the house out, I say: ‘How you find out the house was burning?’

‘We got a call from Kelvin’, I kick your motherfucking ass.

Links:
[USA Today]: NCAA imposes recruiting ban on Indiana coach Kelvin Sampson
[IndyStar.com]: Shame on IU’s AD, president

Categories
Chicago Cubs

Odds and Ends for Fri May 26 2006: Barrett gets 10 game suspension

Michael Barrett was suspended for punching A.J. Pierzynski in the jaw after a home plate collision. Most major leaguers would give Barrett a bonus for punching A.J., one of the most hated athletes in sports but MLB decided a 10 game ban was in order.

In other news…

[ESPN]: Amare to change jersey number from No. 32 to No. 1

[Reuters]: Timmy Smith (most rushing yard in a Super Bowl) gets 2 1/2 years in jail for selling cocaine

[Lingering Bursitis]: Liveblogging the disappearance of integrity [both ESPN’s and my own]

[XM MLB Chat]: Bonds fatigue: Even the Giants’ local market cares 37% less than it did 2 years ago

Categories
High School Sports

Sportsmanship is alive and well in Connecticut



Thinks there’s a BCS
in high school sports

The Connecticut Interscholastic Athletic Conference has instituted a rule that any football coach who runs up the score and wins by more than 50 points will be suspended for the next game. The CIAC claims it’s been looking into this rule for the last couple of years but apparently it’s all because of one coach, New London’s Jack Cochran.

During a game when his team was up 60-0, Cochran called a timeout right before the half, ostensibly to get another score in. (This might be the biggest dick move since Buddy Ryan ordered Randall Cunningham to fake a kneel down against the Dallas Cowboys.) That angered the opposing coach so much that he hit a security guard and a New London assistant coach and was arrested. So now, the football mercy rule is known unofficially as the “Jack Cochrane rule”.

Football committee chairman Leroy Williams explained the need for the rule.


Try to explain that to kids. When you get someone down, you don’t have to kick them. The key thing to remember is, it’s about the quality of the game. It’s about teaching kids right from wrong. It’s about the game of life and that’s how we had to look about it.

Actually, if it’s one thing we learned from watching amateur sports like college football and Bob Stoops over the years, it’s that you should always run up the score whenever possible because that’s how you come out a winner!

Links:
[Boston.com]: Connecticut group flags high school routs

Categories
MLB General

MLB Power Rankings Roundup for May 26 2006

The Tigers and the White Sox vie for MLB Power Ranking supremecy but not much has changed in a week in the top 10. Except for the Dodgers. The other team from LA have won 7 in a row, most recently sweeping the previous Top 10 team the Rockies. It only takes a hot streak to reach or fall out of the top 10, which is why the White Sox and the Tigers (?!) are so impressive.

Here are your Major League Baseball Power Rankings by top sites this week.

Rank Sportscolumn ESPN FoxSports Sportsline USA Today TSN.ca
1 White Sox White Sox Tigers White Sox White Sox Tigers
2 Tigers Tigers White Sox Red Sox Cardinals Dodgers
3 Cardinals Cardinals Cardinals Tigers Tigers Yankees
4 Mets Mets Diamondbacks Cardinals Red Sox Red Sox
5 Red Sox Yankees Yankees Dodgers Mets Cardinals
6 Yankees Red Sox Mets Phillies Yankees White Sox
7 Blue Jays Diamondbacks Dodgers Mets Blue Jays Phillies
8 Reds Dodgers Red Sox Yankees Reds Rockies
9 Diamondbacks Blue Jays Blue Jays Blue Jays Phillies Reds
10 Astros Reds Reds Astros Astros Blue Jays
11-30 more more more more more more

Categories
MLB General

Full Count for Fri May 26 2006: There actually is crying in baseball



…it’s only Nats wasteland

1. This really shouldn’t be that emotional: Frank Robinson was crying after Thursday’s game despite his Nationals’ 8-5 victory over the Astros. This was because he had to use an extremely rare move–benching a catcher in the middle of an inning. It’s not like this move was unjustified either–backup catcher Matthew LeCroy had allowed 7 stolen bases and made two throwing errors. “I feel for him,” Robinson said, “And I hope fans understand. I just appreciate him hanging in there as long as he did.” What is this, a little league? LeCroy didn’t care as much. “Hey, he’s doing his job, just like I would do if I was in his position. Yet Robinson still cried, in the process becoming the Dick Vermeil of baseball. By the way, has anyone noticed that Jose Vidro is leading the NL in hitting? He had a homer and 4 RBIs on the day.

2. Simply unfair: The Tigers-Royals matchup the past few seasons has been a laughable affair between the worst two teams in baseball. Well, it’s laughable as well this year, but in a different way. The Tigers, already up 3-0 in the series, won 13-8 despite being down 6 runs after the first inning. Tigers starter Mike Maroth, who was 3rd in the AL in ERA coming into the game, had possibly the worst game any starter has pitched this season. He recorded one out, allowed 6 earned runs, 6 hits, and 3 homeruns before getting pulled. And the Royals still couldn’t win the ballgame, as Detroit’s offense rocked their weak pitching staff. Ivan Rodriguez homered and drove in 5, Craig Monroe went 4-4 with 4 runs scored, and Marcus Thames hit two balls out of the park. The win increased the Royals losing streak to an unbelievable 13 in a row, and the team has yet to defeat the Tigers this year in 8 tries.

3. Your typical AL West game: The AL West division is kind of like the PAC-10 of baseball. The games always seem to be a little crazier than games from other divisions. Thursday’s Rangers-A’s matchup was no different, as Texas stormed to an 8-7 victory. Despite being down 7-0 after five innings, the Rangers scored all of their runs in the last four innings to win the ballgame. Mark Teixeira hit a homerun (surprisingly only his fifth of the season), and Phil Nevin hit a game-winning, walk-off shot in the 9th. Texas, at 24-23, commands the division lead.

4. Just who they were looking for: The Boston Red Sox signed Josh Beckett in the offseason to be their ace, and so far it has looked like an excellent decision. Beckett beat the Devil Rays last night to improve to 7-1 on the season, allowing no runs in 6 innings. Before last night, Boston was only 3-3 against the D-Rays this year. But last night’s win preserved their one-game lead over the Yankees in the AL East. By the way, Tampa Bay is still in last place, but they do have more wins than the LA Angels, Minnesota Twins, and Chicago Cubs, among others.

5. A collection of no-names: Usually the batting average leaderboard is filled with current and rising stars. This year, it’s more about the `rising’ stars. The top two hitters of the year have been Alex Rios and Casey Blake. Shea Hillenbrand, another Blue Jay, is fifth. Florida’s Hanley Ramirez, a rookie, is eighth at .335. Brad Hawpe, a previously unknown catcher from the Rockies, is 11th overall. In fact, only about 8 of the top 20 batters are known by the casual fan. What a season.