Category: San Antonio Spurs

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San Antonio Spurs

Odds and Ends: Eva Longoria already has Tony Parker on lockdown


Yes folks, it’s just another excuse to run a pic of Eva Longoria but In Touch Weekly (you know, the magazine you pretend not to read at the dentist office) is reporting that Eva has banned Tony Parker from having a bachelor party because she thinks it’s just asking for trouble. Hmmm… unless Jessica Alba or Scarlett Johannson is showing up at the bachelor party and giving lapdances, we think Eva is pretty safe that she won’t get traded in.

In other news…

[MSNBC]: LaDanian Tomlinson becomes the first Charger to win MVP

[SI ]: Not only were the players juiced, so were the balls

[Sportsline]: If a WNBA franchise folds in the woods…

[MSNBC]: Appleby says Wie ‘not ready’ to play men

[NBA]: Finally, an NBA All-Star team worth voting for: Dancers!

[The Offside]: This might be your last chance to see Ronaldo’s ex having sex on YouTube

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San Antonio Spurs

Eva Longoria sells Tony Parker out

When you’re named one of People’s 50 Most Beautiful people, everyone expects that you’re a bigger babe hound than Sam Malone. Not so in the case of Tony Parker.


He’s only been with one other person in his life.

He’s very sweet,” she says of her French-born boyfriend. “I’m the experienced one. I’m the teacher, especially about love. He’s always telling me he’s never met anyone who loves the way I do — wholly and freely and unconditionally.

So Eva Longoria has to tell the world that Tony has only been with 2 women in his whole life. The unemployed guy down the street living with his mom has a better scoreboard than that. She’s just given his opponents ammo for trash talk. Then again, he’s being “tutored” by Eva Longoria so I guess he’s not doing too badly. Scoreboard indeed.

[CNN]: Eva Longoria on love: ‘I’m the teacher’

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San Antonio Spurs

How does Tony Parker even make it to the game?


Sign this contract, Tony

Tony Parker is averaging 35 minutes, 19 points, and 6 assists per game. He leads the league in exactly 0 of these categories. Yet, he might very well be the most underrated player in the game.  Why? Because he has to fight through this:

Eva Longoria couldn’t climax until she had a Brazilian wax. The ‘Desperate Housewives’ beauty admits she had a lacklustre sex life and struggled to reach orgasm until four years ago – when she had her first Brazilian.

The 30-year-old added: “The first time I did it after the wax I was like, ‘What’s going on with my body? Oh, my God!’ Now I’m becoming more orgasmic with age, which is awesome. I can’t wait until I’m 40. If it keeps increasing this way, watch out world!

At first, I was thinking that perhaps Tony Parker doesn’t want such details about his woman to be publicly known.  Then I realized, what the hell does he care?  This is why he’s smiling all the goddamn time.  It was nothing to do with the Spurs being the best team in the West.

[Idontlikeyouinthatway]: Eva Longoria is Waxed and Horny

[femalefirst.cok.uk]: Eva Longoria’s great Brazilian sex