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Soccer

Don’t worry WNBA, you’re not the only ones who get asked that question


We never have been big fans of soccer, considering how we as Americans are totally oblivious to fact that sport even exists except when our morning SportsCenter is continually canceled for some boring women’s `futbol’ match between Zimbabwe and Northern Hungary. So, seeing that we can’t stand the game, we really think their refs have a crappy job. Except for this guy, he’s having way too much fun out on the pitch.

But we never realized just how lame their lives were until we heard that the refs at a recent women’s soccer match were reduced to performing nut checks to verify genders of the players.

Banyana Banyana coach Augustine Makalakalane has described as mischievous claims allegedly made by a top Ghanaian official that SA used a male player in their Olympic qualifier at the Caledonian Stadium last month.

“I don’t know what the official is up to, but what he is quoted as saying can be best described as utter rubbish,” fumed Makalakalane. “We’ve never cheated and maybe he should consult with his captain in future before he makes such irresponsible comments.

“Fact of the matter is that they raised a suspicion against our striker, Alice Noko Matlou from Limpopo and the officiating referee made an inspection in our dressing room in the present of the Ghana captain. After everyone concerned was satisfied that our player was a girl, she was allowed to feature in the game. The referee would not have allowed her to be part of the game if Alice or anyone else was indeed male.

“If it is indeed correct that the Ghanaian official has said this, then I’m personally disappointed with his conduct. But if it’s an attempt to play mind games against us ahead of the return game in Ghana in December, then let me inform them that we are not only bringing Alice, but the whole Banyana Banyana. They can also expect another player with male features in our team for that contest, and that will still not be cheating,” he said.

Sure, looking down a soccer chick’s pants might sound cool, but you gotta realize that if you have to look down her pants to determine if it’s a dude or a lady then she’s probably not the Jennie Finch or Anna Kournikova kinda athlete. But this practice could be useful here in America; after all, if our refs would perform inspections like this then Christian Laettner would have never been allowed to taint the Dream Team.

Links:

[The Offside]: Genitalia Inspection now part of Referees’ job description
[SuperSoccer.co.za]: Banyana dispute gender cheating claims
[The Sun]: Spot the ball please, ref