New York Knicks

Stephon Marbury verbally pimp slaps Lebron james

When asked whether he could endorse a $15 sneaker like Marbury does, Lebron said, “No, I don’t think so. Me being with Nike, we hold our standards high.” That’s a nice little dis but probably not meant with as much derision as it seems.

Yet, Starbury being Starbury came up the best retort we’ve heard in a while:

I’d rather own than be owned.

Nice shot, Stephon. Who knew he could think that quickly on his feet.


[Newsday]: LeBron steps up sneaker war

[SC]: Stephon Marbury’s shoes

New York Knicks

Body parts wash up in the strangest places

Reunited at last?

James Dolan is a corporate big wig who is the owner of the Knicks and Rangers, CEO of Cablevision and Chairman of Madison Square Garden and earlier this morning he became the owner of a human leg that washed up on his property in Cove Neck, N.Y.

The limb was wrapped inside of a garbage bag and found by the billionaire’s landscaper. Police said that the skin was still attached to the bone which would seem to indicate that it hadn’t been floating around for too terribly long.

Now, we don’t know a lot about Cove Neck, N.Y. but this has got to hurt the resale value of the property. But hey, it’s better than what washed up in Mamaroneck. That’s where an entire women’s torso washed ashore earlier this month. The law is still unable to identify the victim.

However, one possible owner of the leg was revealed. Unfortunately, she is currently on a business trip to Hollywood for a stint on “Dancing with the Stars,” but will be notified immediately for questioning.


[]: Leg washes ashore on property of Knicks owner

New York Knicks

New York Knicks: 4 more years of mediocrity!

Isiah did wonders for the CBA

Apparently Knicks owner James Dolan (the worst owner in sports) thinks that a possible 8th seed playoff berth and 5 games below .500 is evidence of Zeke “turning the team around” because he just gave Thomas a multi-year contract extension.

That isn’t what you should rely on in terms of what motivates a team,” Dolan said of the club playing for Isiah’s job. “I know some will worry the pressure will be off. Don’t worry. This team will play just as hard before this announcement as after this announcement. You can count on that.”

The players getting better, the hard work, the heart they showed, that counted more to me than the won-loss record. We wouldn’t be sitting here today if we had the same record and didn’t show we had the heart and [the young players] hadn’t developed.

If the Atlantic division wasn’t so pathetic, would the Knicks even be sniffing the playoffs? Look, in the end, Isiah Thomas might not be the worst GM/coach in sports history but does anyone really think he’s the guy to take this team to the promised land? This smells of James Dolan just wanting to give Larry Brown the finger again.



New York Knicks

We should be so lucky as to work for the Knicks


Do you want to make money for doing nothing? Would you like to sit at home all day and watch the cash rolling in? Then apply now to be part of the Knicks organization! It’s simple. Just convince Isiah Thomas and James Dolan that you have what it takes to be a Knickerbocker and then do a horrible job. They won’t simply fire you, they’ll pay you money to go away! Brilliant.

Today, the Knicks bought out Jalen Rose’s contract for $15M. Jalen Rose is such a waste of space that the Knicks would rather pay him $15M than have him in uniform this year for his $16.7M salary. We’re not sure what that says about the Knicks or Jalen Rose.

Meanwhile, David Stern also negotiated the settlement of Larry Brown’s contract. Remember Larry Brown? He was fired for doing a tremendously shitty job with $40M left on his contract. Instead of taking his firing as a defeat, Larry decided to ask for $52M. To paraphrase Nick Hornby, that’s like getting rejected by a girl attempting to reach second and trying for third base instead.

Part of the settlement required that neither side discuss the dollar amount but legal experts think LB will get over $30M. So there you have it folks, the Knicks probably paid at least $45M today to tell two people to stop working for them. Hey New York fans, how’s your cable bill these days?

[NY Daily News]: Larry, Knicks bury hatchet

[NY Daily News]: Rose: $15M to walk away
[Miami Herald]: Heat eyes Jalen Rose

New York Knicks

Odds and Ends: It’s gotta be the shoes

Not enough heel support

When you’re trying to push a $15 shoe that is every bit as good as the $150 being pimped by other players, the last thing you need is to miss a game because of a foot injury, specifically heel inflamation. Of course, Marbury denied it had anything to do with his shoes.

We’re just kidding of course, the $15 shoe for kids is probably the only decent thing Stephon Marbury has ever done in his career.

In other news…

[Fox Sports]: Clijsters bruises tailbone after falling over dog… somewhere Brian Griese is smiling

[NFL Fanhouse]: Edgerrin James has made a huge mistake

[The Offside]: Someone hook this guy up with Dirk Nowitzki

[Can’t Stop the Bleeding]: You think maybe he forgot to tell officials cause he has ADD?

New York Knicks

Larry Brown is just getting greedy

Needs another $12.5M for a
new sweater

When Larry Brown was fired from the New York Knicks after a disaster of a season, we figured that Larry would demand the rest of his contract to be paid up and then they’d settle for something close to $41 million but not quite. Well it turns out that Larry Brown thinks he deserves more than the full $50 for his one year of service. On top of the remainder of his $50M contract, LB has asked for another $12.5M for “liquidated damages” and attorneys fees.

Let’s see, $62.5M for 23 wins works out to $2.7M per win. Isn’t it amazing that Larry Brown actually thinks he deserves MORE money for getting fired? Most people would just slink away with a $41M lump sum check and call it a day but not Larry, he wants to collect the money “the right way”. Sadly some other team will be desperate enough to hire Larry Brown to turn their franchise around and Larry will collect yet another paycheck. The man is a genius.


New York Knicks

Sep 25 in Sports History: Marv Albert gets arrested

In 1997: In one of the most uncomfortable and embarrassing moments in sportscasting history, announcer Marv Albert plead guilty to assault and battery of a female companion in a Virginia hotel room. Albert was accused of repeatedly biting the woman on the back and forcing her to perform sex acts. Albert was immediately fired from his job at NBC, where he did NBA and NFL broadcasts; and he was forced to resign from MSG Network as the voice of the New York Knicks, where he started over 30 years ago. He was rehired by NBC a few years later and became the voice of the New Jersey Nets in 2005 on the YES Network.

In 2001: Despite being “99.9 percent sure” he would never play again, Michael Jordan announced he would be returning (again) to play in the NBA, this time for the Washington Wizards. Jordan, who was already the president of basketball operations, played two more seasons for the lowly Wizards, averaging 21 points and selling out all 82 home games at the MCI Center in Washington (and most arenas on the road). He retired at the end of the 2003 season.

In 1994: In the most shocking upset since Mike Tyson-Buster Douglas, journeyman Oliver McCall knocked out heavyweight champ Lennox Lewis in Lewis’ hometown of London. McCall lost the title shortly thereafter, and is most remembered for his nervous breakdown in the ring in a rematch against Lewis, when he began crying and refused to defend himself. Many speculated that McCall was on drugs. All tests, however, came up negative.

New York Knicks

Odds and Ends: Stephon Marbury’s $15 shoe

There aren’t many good things you can say about Stephon Marbury or the Knicks, which is why the news that Starbury is launching a $15 shoe so that kids can afford them is surprising news. We don’t have much to say except kudos to Marbury for doing this. We hope it outsells Shaq’s chinese shoes.

In other news…

[Sportsline]: Titans and mascot won’t face sanctions for hitting Saints backup QB with a golf cart

[MSNBC]: Air Force Academy assistant coach suspended after allegedly striking player

[SI]: Parcells: “Look, you tell Terrell that tomorrow I want him out here for practice. Tomorrow’s the day. I don’t care. Tomorrow’s the day.”

[There’s Your Karma, Ripe as Peaches]: Woman Cycling runner up says, “that’s a man, baby!”

[Lit’s Controversial Sports Chanting]: 2001 NBA Draft Review and Analysis

New York Knicks

James Dolan is the worst owner is sports

When people talk about bad owners, it usually conjures up the image of the miserly bean counter who won’t spend any money to make the team any better. However, sometimes it’s the guy who will spend any amount of money but has no clue what he’s doing and continually sabotages the team with his mistakes. The poster boy for clueless ownership is James Dolan.

At a press conference today, Dolan cemented his status with the following:

  • Told the press that Isiah Thomas had one year to turn the team around or he will be fired. Something which Thomas didn’t appear to be aware of.
  • Said that Larry Brown wanted to release 6 players whose contracts totalled $180M. Among the 6 were Steve Francis, Stephon Marbury, and Jerome James. Note that the NBA has guaranteed contracts.
  • Said that wanting to release those 6 players was Larry Brown’s way of forcing Dolan to fire him. Accused Brown of having no intention of coaching more than one year when he signed the five year contract with the Knicks.

Let’s just focus on his ultimatum to Isiah Thomas shall we? It’s fine to put Isiah on notice in private but calling him out in public? First, it puts undue pressure on Isiah and will become a press conference question after every game in the second half of the season. Second, how is Isiah supposed to motivate his team (we actually don’t think he can anyway) if, say, they are struggling by the all-star break and the players know that he’ll get fired by the end of the season. Why bother busting you hump for a coach who won’t be there? They didn’t do it for Larry Brown, who’s actually a good coach, they won’t do it for Isiah Thomas.

We can’t wait for the vegas over/under on number of Knicks wins next season. We’re going to peg it at 25.

[NY Post]: Thomas gets fair warning
[NY Daily News]: Dolan places Isiah on deck

New York Knicks

Larry Brown Fired! Isiah Thomas takes over Team Titanic


After months of speculation, the Knicks made it official today and fired Larry Brown after just one year. Taking over will be Isiah Thomas who now wears three hats: coach, GM, sexual harasser.

The buyout of Brown’s contract could cost the Knicks as much as $40M. James Dolan issued this statement.

Larry has had a long and storied career. We hired him last summer with the expectation that he would be with the Knicks for a long time. Sometimes decisions work and sometimes they don’t. After careful consideration, despite the best intentions from everyone involved, this current structure did not work for us last season and I did not think it was going to improve next season.

We’re waiting for Vegas to post the over/under on the number of wins for the Knicks next season but one thing we know for sure, NY residents can expect a rise in Cablevision prices. Meanwhile, in Boston, Philly, New Jersey, and Toronto, coaches and GMs rejoice.

[ESPN]: Knicks fire Brown, name Thomas new coach