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College Basketball

Billy Donovan sucks, but not as bad as these guys


Minor league baseball is notorious for having absolutely gosh awful promotions. Take the retarded gimmickry of the Portland Beavers a while back. Bob L. Head night?! Talk about grasping at straws! Oh, but Portland is not the first, nor the last, to literally scrape the bottom of the creative barrel when it comes to putting asses in the seats. The latest perpetrator of pitiful promotions comes to us from the sunny state of Florida.

The marketing geniuses with the Single-A Fort Myers Miracle came up with the timely idea of having “Billy Donovan Night” after the Gators Magic Gators coach tarnished his legacy and broke the hearts of millions of Orlando fans. So, how exactly to you pay homage to a man who’s know as a lying, backstabbing, two faced, weasely little bastard? Why you make fun of him in some of the most ridiculous fashions possible of course.

All ticket issues will be up for negotiation during the first three innings with a power hungry local attorney serving as the final say in all matters. Everything from ticket price to seat location is up for debate during the brief period of 18 outs.

If it’s a Yankee fan, I’m going to tell them to go take their seat and sit there for the whole nine innings,” (Michael) Hornung said. “I have free reign. I’m judge and jury.

If having a period of negotiation isn’t a feeble enough attempt at humor for you, just wait til you hear about the other cheap shots the Miracle have in store for “Billy Donovan Night.” First, they are going to have a local loser named Billy Donovan throw out the first pitch. Next, waffles will be served to the crowd to commemorate Donovan’s “waffling” behavior. And if that still isn’t stupid enough for you then just stick around until the complimentary hair gel is handed out to poke fun at Billy’s hairdo.

Damn, and we thought this guy made the minor league look ridiculous! The only way this idea could possibly be a success in our eyes is if they hold the game at Rolling Rock Park.

Links:

[SI.com]: Minor-league promotion parodies Billy Donovan