One of my favorite parts of the NCAA tournament are the weird, random, and cool names that inhabit the brackets. God Shammgod will always have the best name in college basketball history, followed closely by Ruben Boumtje-Boumtje, but here are this year’s best names in the NCAA tournament. Some of them are funny, some are cool, and some make us giggle because deep down, we are immature and stupid.
1st Team
F: Magnum Rolle, LSU – How’d you like to walk up to a girl and say, “hi, I’m Magnum Rolle.”
F: Pops Mensah-Bonsu, George Washington – just a great name.
C: John Oates, Boston College – I wonder if Darryl Hall can ball as well.
G: Pee-Wee Gash, Tennessee – Do you know the joke where the punchline is “I do too, mine’s as big as a milk pail”?
G: Jonathan Bluitt, Oral Roberts – I would love to see the headline, “Jonathan Bluitt misses game winning layup”. And yes, I stayed away from the obvious Oral Roberts joke.
2nd Team
F: Ryan Teets, Air Force – Imagine groundskeeper Willie saying his name.
F: Luc Richard Mbah a Moute, UCLA – In the Boumtje-Boumtje tradition.
C: Idong Ibok, Michigan State – Sounds like an Apple product.
G: Jazz Williams, Southern – A much better choice than “Polka”.
G: Jamar Nutter, Seton Hall – Do I have to say anything?
Honorable Mentions: Simplice Njoya, Acie Law IV, Maurice Gibbs, Mani Messy, and Mario “Superintendent” Chalmers.
What are your favorite names past and present?
