I’m not just saying this because I hate Duke. It really does in fact suck.
Here are some excerpts:
No bandage can cover my scars
It’s hard living a life behind invisible bars
Searching for the face of God
I’m only inspired by the poems of Nas
I’m impressed that JJ listens to Nas. We would have pegged him for a Sisqo fan. Although I have to wonder which of Nas’ poems he finds inspiring. Is it the one where he’s waving automatic guns at nuns? Is it the where he calls Jay-Z a camel?
My life story is read in poetic stages
I was once weak-minded, now I’m courageous
The cause and effect of a thousand actions
The mathematical breakdown of micro-fractions
It’s difficult to fathom the coming of the rapture
What if I awoke in an empty pasture?
Uh… what? Maybe he’s going to be the next Kirk Cameron or something.
Here’s my favorite:
The rain pours, my tears fall
The pain subsides, I stand in awe
Don’t go chasing waterfalls. Please stick to the rivers and lakes that you’re used to.
You ever get the feeling that JJ writes these on the team bus and imagines he’s Eminem from 8 mile? Christian rap yo! represent.
Sadly, the real poetry from Redick isn’t any better (or worse) than the spoof from Sports Pickle:
My Almost 1.5 Incher
My penis is very small
Yet I stand tall
Knocking down threes
Though I have to use tweezers when I pees
Rising above to hit another jumper
My opponents unaware that I’m hung like Thumper
Starring in the NBA is my next jump
Then I’ll be able to afford a top-of-the-line Swedish penis pump
13 replies on “J.J. Redick’s poetry sucks”
This Blog posting is hysterical — That picture is one of the best things I have ever seen.
um…. u made up a BOGUS fake poem. — ok, i will admit that u are a very funny creative writer, BUT i will say that the first excerpt is ALL bogus those are just seperate lines of a poem that you put together to make J.J. look like an idiot. (evenmore so than when he was a freshman and sophmore). they other excerpts sound retarded but when in the original peom, they are pretty powerful.
the picture is good…. — i luv teh picture…. isnt it from a UNC site… they got some other GREAT pics.
I’m no poet but his poetry is not good — And if you’re referring to “My almost 1.5 incher”… yes, that’s fake. But it could be real.
Whoever that fat kid is who held up the sign should be bought a beer.
Oh JJ lover, you are wrong — Actually, those first lines are not fake and are not taken from different parts of JJ’s work and put together to make him look worse. Those are the exact lines from the poem JJ selected for publication on July 15, 2004.
We don’t need to do anything to make JJ look like an idiot. He can do that ALL BY HIMSELF.
JJ Redick’s poetry — I know nothing about basketball, but I know a good bit about poetry. Redick’s poetry barely even qualifies as coherent English, let alone something in the realm of the artistic.
I can understand praising his willingness to publish something personal, but that does not make good poetry. Those people who are suggesting that he has talent as a poet should probably ask someone who knows about literature to introduce them to ee cummings, Ezra Pound, TS Eliot, or Shakespeare.
Just a thought.
JJ’s Poetry — Yes, it’s bad. What’s amazing to me is how everyone is so jealous of anyone who excels at something that they have to denegrate him/her rather than say, wow – he’s really talented and has a great 3-point shot. You slackers should all have such problems.
redick’s poetry — firts of all i like to say i like his poetry.and the second poem you were talking about is one of my fav. i don’t get why you guys bash on him so much. i bet if he wasn’t as good in basketball as he is you wouldn’t care about his poetry and write the things you do. you guys dont even know him and i can’t believe the things you people right about him. and for the people who say he isn’t in the realm of the artistic, he is artistic they are his poems about his life and his feelings, no one could write it better then he could, just becuase its not as good as some of the famous poets doesn’t mean they suck and he dooesn’t have talent and if you actualy read the poems and try to understand them instead of just reading them quickly and trying to come up with a way to bash it you might like it to. Oh and if you people don’t even like poetry and know nothing about it then you have no business trying to write anything bad about it anyway.
JJ is Redickously Gay — I always thought that JJ was a flaming homosexual, but this puts the icing on the cake. I don’t read poetry, but this has to be some of the worst poetry I have ever read in my life. Shaq wrote better ryhmes. This is only further proof that he likes it in the ass.
Redick and his hype — Ah Redick can go jump off a cliff and the Dookies can go to division 2. Duke fans need to forget him and get on with their lives. I’m sick if him and his pimple necked face. He is a nerd and never won Duke a title. Go figure. He deserves less than 5 minutes a game and never will do anything with it. All the girls out there who love him can love this: GOT A BRAIN AT THE DOLLAR STORE!!!
you and your hype — it’s funny that you called the women who happen to like JJ Redick stupid, and then didn’t even check what you wrote to make sure it was spelt right.
and are titles all you care about?
Basketball isn’t about just one player winning the team a title, it’s about the TEAM winning a title.
even if he was the best player in the world, he might have a bit of trouble winning a title if his team isn’t any good.
so what is it that makes him deserve only 5 minutes a game anyway?
is it because he isn’t the best player on the team or some other reason like that?
because that’s a load of crap and if people were able to use that kind of reasoning you wouldn’t even be able to LOOK at a basketball.
all the people out there who hate him can hate this: (insert finger here)
Redick sucks — He never DID win a championship moron. Get a clue you tool!
He’s better than you — Tell me, exactly, where i ever said that he won a title.
pretty sure i didn’t you moron.