College Football

Louisville Cardinals WRs hunt… The Most Dangerous Game

It never ceases to amaze us how stupid athletes can be. (Yes, we know that even laboratory mice learn after 300 shocks of electricity…) Anyway, two University of Louisville wide receivers were arrested and charged with second degree assault after shooting a woman with paintball guns outside one of those Haunted House things that spring up around Halloween. Chris Vaughn and Scott Long were suspended after the incident on Sunday.

From the obvious file comes this statement from coach Bobby Petrino: “It’s definitely something we don’t condone in our program.” It’s a shame too because if it was something that the Louisville did condone, jersey sales would have skyrocketed. Ahh… missed marketing opportunities.

[The Courier-Journal]: Two U of L reserves arrested, suspended

New York Yankees

And this suprises you because?

High and Tight posted this cartoon from the New York Post that mocks Corey Lidle’s lack of flying skills. It’s in completely poor taste but they seem to think that the Post had sunk to a new level of low or something?

We have stayed away from the Corey Lidle tragedy — mainly cause we don’t handle tragedy well — we prefer arrests and trashy chicks but it’s worth noting that the NY Post is a piece of trash that you should only read if you want to laugh at the New York Knicks.

Cincinnati Bengals

Attention Identity Thieves: Here’s Odell Thurman’s Social Security Number

The Cincinnati Enquirer released the police video of the Odell Thurman arrest today. It’s long and uneventful except for one thing — you can get Odell Thurman’s social security number from it. From his player page, you know he was born on 7/9/1983. Now you figure out his mother’s maiden name and you’re good to go. Better hurry up though, there’s speculation that Thurman will be suspended a full year by the NFL for this latest infraction since he was already serving a 4 game suspension. That money is going to dry up fast.

You’d think the police or the Cinci Enquirer would have the good sense to bleep out his social security number when releasing the video. But you know, maybe those annoying Visa commercials have squashed identify theft already.

[Cincinnati Enquirer]: Video: Thurman’s arrest

[Cincinnati Post]: Thurman faces new suspension


Brazilian ref allows goal scored by ball boy

Watch this video of a ball boy scoring a goal. After the opposing team shot wide of the net, the ball boy casually dribbled a ball back into play and tapped it past the goalie and over the line. It was so obvious that it wasn’t a real goal but the referee awarded the goal to Santacruzense anyway and the game ended up in a 1-1 tie. On top of that, the “goal” happened in the 89th minute. And even worse, the referee was the first woman to have ever reffed a Brazilian National Championship match. We bet the rest of the women who have hopes of becoming a soccer referee are pissed. Also, check out the pavlovian response of the announcer.

Carolina Panthers

Panthers fan gets new truck after a stupid practical joke

Gets a Ford F-150

Remember when you were a kid and there were ads in the back of comic books that offered a 50-foot yacht for $10? And then you ordered it and it was a little toy boat with 50 friggin feet attached to the bottom of it? Well, it wasn’t funny then and it’s still not funny now. And the folks at Fox Sports definitely don’t think those type of jokes are funny anymore.

On August 24, during a preseason game, Dick Stockton and Daryl Johnston started promoting a car giveaway at the end of the game so fans would stay tuned. At the end of the game, Tony Siragusa presented Greg Good, who dresses up as “Catman” for Panthers games with a new white Porsche. Unfortunately it was just a toy car. Good (who might not be so bright) thought it was a token of a real car and couldn’t believe his good luck. Then he found out that it was just the toy car and was understandably very upset.

There was some uproar in the Charlotte area after a Charlotte Observer columnist named Scott Fowler took up Good’s cause. Fox Sports president decided to hand out some punishment over the incident to his staffers and will personally give Good a new Ford F-150 pickup for his troubles. Now… can we stop with the stupid jokes during football telecasts?

[ESPN]: After joke at Panthers game, ‘Catman’ to get truck
[The Smoking Gun]: Woman sues when “100 Grand” prize turns out to be chocolate bar

NBA General

Is Latrell Sprewell going to have to choke a bitch?

Sometimes you start to question whether God has a sense of humor and then a story like this happens. From

According to police, a 21-year-old female alleged that she and Sprewell were having consensual sex Tuesday aboard his yacht, “Milwaukee’s Best,” when Sprewell began to strangle her. Police allegedly observed red marks on the woman’s neck.

This story is hilarious and disturbing on so many levels. First if you’re Latrell Sprewell, shouldn’t you just stay away from anything involving choking? Second, what if Spree was just trying to hit on PJ Carlesimo? And finally, what moron names his yacht after one of the worst beers in the world?

[On Milwaukee]: Exclusive: Latrell Sprewell being investigated for sexual assault, choking

All Other Sports

TV commentator fired after calling a player a terrorist

Dean Jones, a commentator for Sri Lankan TV was fired after he called a South African batsman named Hashim Aslam a terrorist.

After bearded Amla, 23, caught Sri Lanka’s Kumar Sangakkara in the Second Test in Colombo, Jones was heard by millions of shocked viewers to exclaim `the terrorist has got another wicket’.

Ummmm… we’re not exactly sure what the first part of that sentence means but we’re pretty sure the second part is a no-no. Take Howard Cosell’s “Look at that little monkey go!” and multiply it by 10000x and that’s how offensive that was.

[Sun UK]: ‘Terrorist gets a wicket