Tag: video

Categories
NFL General

Odds and Ends: NFL Countdown says sayonara to Emmitt Smith

If you love language-butchering and verbal buffoonery then this is going to be tough for you to take. Emmitt Smith has been released by ESPN, kinda.

It’s official. Emmitt Smith will not be part of ESPN’s two-hour pregame show, NFL Countdown, in 2008.

ESPN is expected to make the formal announcement soon.

Emmitt will be replaced by Cris Carter, whose enhanced visibility could help his chances of getting into the Hall of Fame on the second try. (Then again, if Carter does a bad job or comes off as a blowhard, it could hurt him.)

Emmitt will remain on Monday Night Countdown, and he’ll have a role on the Sunday morning pre-Countdown version of SportsCenter.

We know, we know; it’s difficult to confront. We loved listening to Emmitt slaughter the simplest of sentences just like everyone else. Don’t forget though, he’s not gone; he’s just on two hours less each week. Anyways, utterances like these will live on forever.

In other news…

[FanHouse.com]: Guess which golfer got rid of his man boobs?

[The Undrafted Free Agent]: Mountaineer basketball players love their alcohol

[Bugs & Cranks]: Yup, William Hung is still a horrible singer

[By the Numbers]: Vote no on a tournament in college football. Wait, what???

[YardBarker.com]: Ocho Cinco, Too Tall, Crazy Legs, Bad Moon, Gravedigger and many, many more of your favorite NFL nicknames

[SportsAgentBlog.com]: Finally, a reason besides Erin Andrews to love the University of Florida

[Rush the Court]: NBA draft picks by school (1949-2008)

[CollegeHumor.com]: “Oh, monsieur!! The boys took a beating on that one.”

[Redskins.com]: Colt Brennan is a system quarterback and a blogger

[The Big Picture]: “Booze + Ambien + bad judgment + flight attendants = one year of jail time and a $4,000 fine”

[The Love of Sports]: Yogi Berra gets robbed, winds up with only one of the Top 20 Baseball Quotes of All Time

[SidelineHotties.com]: Finally, a site devoted entirely to sideline hotties

[TampaBay.com]: If the Rays win the World Series, we want a large with pepperoni and jalapenos

[Hollyscoop]: Freddie Prinze Jr. joins the WWE and becomes The Masked Blogger

[Tirico Suave]: Can it get any better than babes telling us about fantasy football? Uh, no

[Kissing Suzy Kolber]: `Just make it look like an accident’

[The World of Isaac]: Hallelujah, we can finally forget about Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon

And finally, hey, where’d you find that guy? We’ve been looking for a little person friend who’s willing to kick himself in the head with steel toe boots too!!

Categories
Cincinnati Bengals

The Quote Machine Chad Johnson does it again

Chad Johnson easily reigns as the league’s funniest guy, but, apparently, Ocho Cinco isn’t all fun-n-games because he’s already planning on how he can injury Carson Palmer in a fight.

Why you laughing? We’re serious.

We’ve said it before and we’ll say it again, nothing gets the NFL juices flowin’ like a little preseason premeditated assault.

Links:

[Shot Clock Violation]: Ocho Cinco: I’m gonna hit [Carson] in his knee…the bad one.

Categories
All Other Sports

Arrrrr edges out Uhhhhh, Owwwww and Nooooo to take first

Sometimes we think owners give their horses stupid names just to make the race announcers sound like fools. But, hey, we’re not complaining.

Categories
Olympics

Odds and Ends: Hair today, gone tomorrow

The Olympics are rapidly approaching and the one question on everyone’s mind is, “Will the Nigerian football team players cut off their sweet locks or what?”

Nigeria’s Olympic football coach Samson Siasia has warned his players that he expects short hair and correct clothing for the Beijing Games, a federation spokesman said on Friday.

Siasia, known as a stickler for discipline, believes that his players are devoting too much time to their elaborate hairstyles, time which he believes could be better used in fine-tuning their performances.

And the coach goes as far as to claim that players with short hair are more aerodynamic and so find it easier to find their rhythm on the pitch.

So the hair makes all the difference, huh? Well, explain these athletes then.

In other news…

[Awful Announcing]: Jeff Brantley does not want to run into Ken Griffey Jr in a dark alley

[JoeSportsFan.com]: We still can’t believe we actually beat Mr. X

[ESPN]: Best NFL playoff performances

[Athlebrities.com]: Baron Davis has a Shemagwhat?

[SportsByBrooks.com]: Erin Andrews’ bed. Mmmmmmmm, Erin Andrews’ bed

[Sportaphile.com]: Homophobic ad No. 1…

[BottomLineCom.com]: And homophobic ad No. 2

[Uncoached]: We heart New York

[Need4Sheed.com]: Optimistic about Kwame?!? Bwah-hahahahahahahaha!!

[UniqueDaily.com]: Another completely pointless record gets broken

[Tirico Suave]: Groundhog stew. Mmmmmmmmm, groundhog stew

[Yahoo! Sports]: Pat Riley is still a sucker for yellow

[Larry Brown Sports]: Would really expect anything less from Randy Moss’ daughter?

[WagRankings.com]: The 21 hottest sports movie WAGs

[Dbacks.com]: Diamondbacks fans love their dogs

[BannedInHollywood.com]: Golden Bear goddess

And finally, friendship moves!

Categories
Chicago Cubs

FOUND: Charlie Weis’ audition tape for The Three Tenors

Anytime someone climbs up to the announcer’s box at a Cubbies game for an opportunity to lead the home crowd in “Take Me Out To The Ballgame,” it’s usually going to end with cats screeching and dogs howling. After all, when is the last time you were watching WGN and saw a rendition that made you stand and applaud? Never, that’s when. So, as expected, when Charlie Weis hoisted himself up to the skybox, he proved he’s tone deaf and we got a kick out of it.

That was pretty bad, but don’t worry, Ozzy, you’re still the man.

Categories
All Other Sports

The Jackass generation continues to thrive

Who says the Olympics need an extravagant torch lighting ceremony? We’d be perfectly happy if they did something simple and classy like this:

Our favorite part is pre-inferno when the idiot who’s letting himself be lit on fire calls the other idiot an idiot. What an idiot.

Categories
All Other Sports

The lovely and gullible Maria Sharapova

For some strange reason, we can totally see Stu Scott pulling something like this.


This Is Sportscenter ~~~~ – The best video clips are here

Categories
All Other Sports

OUCH! Right in the foosballs!

Talk about being disappointed in ourselves; we’ve been playing foosball since childhood and never once have we attempted to use the table as a source of humor/pain.

What’s next? Is someone going to tell us we could have been racking our friends during all those years of practicing karate too?

Categories
Seattle Mariners

Odds and Ends: Ichiro goes bananas

Ever since we heard about Ichiro Suzuki’s out of character behavior every year at the All-Star Game, we thought something about the story sounded a little fishy. Well, we were right. As it turns out, Ichiro was accidentally exposed to the blast of a test detonation of a gamma bomb as a child. The effects were startling, making him a baseball machine, but also creating an emotional and impulsive alter ego. When anger or frustration set in, the transformation occurs. So, please, whenever around Ichiro, don’t make him angry. You wouldn’t like him when he’s angry.

In other news…

[D.C. Sports Bog]: Colt Brennan is a system QB…and a dork

[FoodCourtLunch.com]: Super Bowl halftime performer odds are released

[Kissing Suzy Kolber]: `Joe Simpson’s Daughter Touching Company’ and other snazzy fantasy football team names

[IntentionalFoul.com]: LeBron says the USA is as good as gold

[Chicago Bull]: Would you want to wrestle a Long Wang?

[eTrueSports.com]: “Brett, who is this Purple People Eater that keeps texting you?”

[Sportaphile.com]: Wow, has it really been 25 years and day since this…

[Bugs & Cranks]: We thought it was just passion, but cocaine is much more reasonable

[SimonOnSports.com]: We did much better on the “What Bra Size Do I Wear? Erin Andrews Edition”

[Fanhouses Boxing]: Wait, we missed the World Chess Boxing Championships again?!?

[The Zone Blitz]: A tour of Pac-10 stadiums, Google Earth style

[Mr. Irrelevant]: Redskins bust out the big balls to practice for upcoming Wipeout tryouts

[The Big Lead]: Last night’s minor league baseball rumble from a fan’s POV

[ABC News]: Ricky Williams is all over this article

[Blue Monkey Disco Party]: Bet you don’t have these cards in your collection

[Our of Right Field]: Remember this guy?

[Metacafe.com]: Some call it a prank, we call it a GREAT day

And finally, dude, use your star power!

Categories
NFL General

The lost tapes of Erin Andrews’ early days in the sports biz

We know that you can’t wait for the NFL season to roll around. The anticipation is enough to make you want to cryogenically freeze yourself so you can peacefully sleep until its time to draft your fantasy team. Well, here’s a little something to help dull the pain of everyday life without the pigskin flying. Just try to watch this and not want to forget about football for the rest of your life.

See more funny videos at Funny or Die