Categories
College Football

College football’s second-oldest rivalry finally got interesting


If you told someone that Kansas would be sitting in the No. 2 spot of the BCS standings in the wanning weeks of the season prior to the initial kickoff, then you’d probably be locked inside Shady Acres right now. Well, it’s a fact, Jack, and with Missouri sitting just behind them at numero cuatro, that makes their contest at Arrowhead Stadium this weekend one of the biggest games in an insane college football season.

We know, we know. It’s hard to come to grips with, but considering that two of the Big 12’s most notorious doormats are atop the North Division’s standings, the winner of this game secures a place in the conference championship game. The Sooners or possibly the Longhorns will emerge from the South as their opponent.

While it will be a tough challenge, if the Jayhawks win the Big 12 crown, they’ll advance to play in the BCS Championship game against LSU, should the Tigers win out. And just imagine, if they can do the impossible on the big stage then we’ll be talking about this season for generations to come. It’s easy to say it could never happen, but, c’mon, who thought they could make it this far. We’re not even sure if Mark Mangino believed his squad could pull this off. You gotta admit, it would be a befitting end to this wacky year of collegiate pigskin.

And even if “Rock Chalk, Jayhawk” goes down this Saturday, the improbable is still probable because Missouri would then advance to Big 12 title game where they could win and possibly jump West Virginia into the Crystal Football Bowl.

There’s still a heckuva lotta football to be played before we get this whole mess sorted out, but it is certain that the BCS future rests in Kansas’ hands this weekend. We don’t know about you, but we’re pulling for incredibly unnatural BCS babies in this situation.

Links:

[Fox Sports]: Kansas moves up to No. 2 in standings

Categories
College Football

Honestly Joe, we don’t even remember your apology


A pretty embarrassing situation went down in the Mountain West Conference over the weekend. Wyoming head ball coach Joe Glenn, who guaranteed victory earlier in the week, got a wee frustrated after Utah tried to run up the score by attempting an onside kick while winning 43-0. But he didn’t throw his clipboard or let little wads of spittle smack a ref in the face as he unleashed his unhappiness. Nope, he just decided to calmly give the Utes a finger (guess which one) and on Monday he apologized for it.

I met with my team on Sunday and apologized to them for the gesture I made toward the Utah bench during the game,” Glenn said in a statement.

“I also want to apologize to all fans for that action. Football is an emotional game, and I let my emotions get the best of me,” he said. “I felt it was appropriate for me to let my team and all fans know that I am truly sorry for that emotional moment.”

Mountain West Conference officials planned to review videotape of the game. According to the conference handbook, obscene gestures or language are subject to at least a reprimand for a first offense.

After the loss Saturday, Glenn said he didn’t remember giving the finger.

“Honest to God, I can’t even respond to it,” he said at the time. “Maybe, I don’t know.”

It was an embarrassing week for Glenn.

He had publicly guaranteed a win over Utah (7-3, 4-2 Mountain West Conference). Late in the game, the crowd of 42,000 in Salt Lake City began chanting “guarantee.”

“I got emotional last week and got my big Irish mouth going and made the guarantee,” Glenn said. I’d probably like to have it back now. I wouldn’t do it again. Find the crow and I’ll eat it.

Couple things. First, you “met with my team on Sunday and apologized to them”??? Shouldn’t you be apologizing to a completely different locker room of players?

Second, don’t make guarantees if you don’t want to get hell for it. Especially when you’re on the road. We don’t care if you’re sitting in an igloo in the artic circle with just a polar bear. That bear better be a rug if you guarantee a victory in front of him. You got exactly what you deserved.

Third, did you seriously expect to get away with the whole wrapped-up-in-the-moment, amnesia defense? Football coaches remember every second of every game and every play on every down, but yet he can’t remember what happened after the onside kick? About the only person dumb enough to buy that would be someone dumb enough to guarantee victory on the opponent’s turf.

Links:

[MyFoxAustin.com]: Wyoming Coach Apologizes For Giving Finger To Utah

Categories
College Football

Macho Harris’ crib gets the Swiss cheese makeover


Virginia Tech’s Victor Harris, better known to pigskin junkies as “Macho”, was involved in a shooting early Sunday morning. Well, at least his apartment was.

Nobody was injured during the hail of gunfire and police who responded at 3:49 a.m. are still trying to put together the pieces of what exactly happened. But we do know that Harris lives alone in the apartment, although three other students were in his apartment at the time, and we do know that if we were Harris, our nickname would be changed from “Macho” to “Titty Baby” following this incident.

An initial investigation by officers recovered evidence that seven shots were fired from a 9-millimeter handgun, and a single shotgun blast hit the face of the apartment building, the release said.

An attempt was made Monday to interview Harris after Tech’s football practice, but the athletic department didn’t make him available for interviews. Tech coach Frank Beamer didn’t have much information on the incident.

“We’re still gathering information on that,” Beamer said. “They were just in there minding their own business the way I heard it. I don’t know a whole lot about it myself other than what (players) told me. They were there and then all of a sudden stuff started.

Uh, duh, coach. Of course they were just sitting in there minding their business when the 9-milimeter and shotgun calling cards came knocking. You need to be worried about what they we’re doing before the bullets hit the walls. And if this isn’t some sort of retaliatory action, then Hokies fans are about as backwards as they come. Virginia Tech is coming off a smashing of Florida State; seems like if there would be a drive-by going down, it would at least coincide with a losing streak. Even then we’d say it’s probably a tad overboard. Hell, Bobby Bowden only gets “For Sale” signs stuck in his yard after the Seminoles stink it up.

Links:

[DailyPress.com]: Shots fired into apartment of Va. Tech’s “Macho” Harris

Categories
College Football

Hey, Tim Tebow, is your refrigerator running?

Remember when Tim Tebow made that “I’ll call you” gesture after a touchdown during the first quarter of the Florida/LSU game on Saturday? Well, turns out he wasn’t trying to pick up a Louisianan cutie; he was actually trying to needle the Tiger fans who prank called him hundreds of times leading up to the game.

Tebow said many of the messages contained physical threats and most included foul language.

“I really don’t use that type of language too much, so I can’t tell you,” Tebow said, declining to reveal any of the messages. “Some people did take it way too far, farther than you should take it with sports. But I think for the most part people were just having fun. Unfortunately, there’s people like that everywhere.”

Tebow said the messages started coming early last week and increased in number as the game got closer. He eventually turned the phone off, but had to listen to each voice message and read each text message before deleting them.

But Tim got himself a new number and now Kentucky fans have almost two full weeks to go Colombo and decipher those digits. While we can see how a billion giggly phone pranks could become a slight nuisance, we gotta admit, there really is nothing better than a finely crafted prank call. Isn’t that right, Juice?

Links:

[CBSSports.com]: Florida’s Tebow changes phone number after threatening calls

Categories
College Football

Mike Leach break his arm while bicycling…wait, bicycling??



We always took Leach as a scooter
guy for some reason.

Oddly enough our oddball injury of the day goes to one of college football’s biggest oddities, Texas Tech coach Mike Leach. We’d like to say that it involves a pirate ship, a parrot and a plank, but that would just be wishful thinking.

Leach said today (Monday) he broke a bone in his right arm. He hit the pavement after falling from his bicycle Friday.

Leach says he got a flat tire and tried to fill it with enough air to make it to his destination, but “it proceeded to run out of air. I took a routine turn, then went into a slide, so then it broke the arm.

While Leach takes the cake for stupidest boo-boo, Limas Sweed gets the nod for most demoralizing Big 12 injury.

Just days after losing to rival Oklahoma, the Longhorns wide receiver found out that his college career is over. Sweed needs surgery to repair ligament damage in his wrist stemming from a preseason incident.

I knew it was an injury I would be dealing with going into the season and I did everything I could to play through the pain and help the team,” Sweed said.

“I’ve aggravated it a couple of times and again last week and have probably been in more pain than I let anybody know,” he added.

If you thought Mack Brown was throwing a fit after Colt McCoy took a late hit in the game against Oklahoma, you know that the furniture is flying in his office today. After all, considering Texas’ running game is virtually nonexistent, without Sweed in the lineup, Brown chances of Leachin’ it up and getting 500+ yards per game through the air just lost all sorts of steam.

Links:

[KCBD.com]: Texas Tech coach Leach breaks arm in bicycle crash
[SportingNews.com]: Horns lose Sweed to wrist injury

Categories
College Football

Reading a college football schedule just got easier, if that’s even possible



If this is too confusing then we can dumb it down
for ya.

Men are a visual species who typically want everything to be relayed to them in the most basic, cavemanesque methods possible. The last thing any real man wants to do is read, right? Words have their place and all, but if we can obtain all the info we need in a picture then that allows more time for important things like staring at the big, glossy pictures of Jessica Alba in one of those random men’s magazines that are all the rage right now. See, we don’t even know what trashy publication we’re reading because we’re too focused on the exposed skin!

So, we were totally thrilled to come across this sweet Excel spreadsheet that makes life, oh, so much easier. Not because the entire college football season is all in one place and right at our fingertips, but because instead of using those damn, annoying words like “Florida State” or “Oregon,” there’s a nice little picture of the team’s helmet!

Just think of all the time you’ll save this season because there will be no more encoding and decoding the messages that normally accompanies a schedule. There’s going to be a whole lot more time spent staring at the picture box now that you won’t be bothered with the time consuming process of reading phrases such as “Nebraska at Texas.” So, thanks to whoever wasted hours of their life creating this bad boy just so we can waste more hours of our life doing virtually nothing. We’re putting this right up there with the Michael Vick dog toy as the football fan’s must-haves for the season.

Links:

[Awful Announcing]: The Guy Who Invented This Is An Evil Genius
[Cobra Brigade]: You Want a NCAA Football Schedule

Categories
College Football

Chris Rix can’t handle the truth

So I went out and got absolutely shitfaced last night. Desperately looking for an outlet to waste time while I’m sitting at work, I was flipping through random blogs. Basically, I was just hoping to find something that can carry me for a half hour. After reading that David Beckham had a successful MLS debut against DC United, it occurred to me that I hadn’t checked Flashwarner.com to find out if there was a new round of “Becks” bashing. Quite frankly, I was just hoping to lob in some anonymous sarcastic comment like, “You’re right…..David Beckham stinks…..he’s only accounted for 3 of England’s last four international goals and probably every single one in the last three World Cups.”

Instead, I stumbled upon inspirational comedy. Raise your hands if you remember the Chris Rix Era at Florida State…..and Florida State fans……feel free to lower the middle finger you now have extended towards me. When historians look back on when Bobby Bowden started to lose his fastball, I guarantee they will point at the day Chris Rix was announced as the starting quarterback for Florida State. His tenure there was an unmitigated disaster as he was known throughout the college football universe for throwing interceptions at crucial times, an inability to lead in the clutch, and a swagger that reminded of an overwhelmed 17-year old trying to…..umm…”close the deal” for the first time.

Well, Mr. Rix has opened a Champions Training Academy to teach young players how to become a great quarterback. I think Flash Warner said it best when she remarked, that this would be like Michelle Wie running an academy called “Making the Cut on the PGA Tour”. I would add that Chris Rix being associated with the word “champion” is like Paris Hilton being associated with the word “chaste” or Lindsay Lohan being associated with the word “sober”. In a nutshell, it is absurd. Well Flash and a site she writes for are being threatened with a subpoena for stating this in an article…….or basically stating the obvious. Basically, Chris Rix is trying to intimidate a girl………..because quite frankly that is all he can intimidate.

See, Chris, in times like these, it’s best just to ignore critical blog entries because otherwise the whole thing just balloons out of control. And then you have more and more blogs weighing in. Clearly not championship strategy.

Categories
College Football

The Biggest Damn Dork In The Land

College football is just around the corner and everyone is beginning to wear their team colors proudly in anticipation of the upcoming season. But you’ve got your normal fans and then you’ve got your SUPER fans whose life’s mission is to honor their chosen university. Shawn Swick is one of those SUPER fan kinda guys.

Swick loves The Ohio State University so much that he turned one of his rooms into “The Best Damn Room In The Land” by recreating the hallowed Horseshoe with a room size mural that took 10 gallons of paint and one year to complete. The Buckeye freak says that he just loves the team and thought the idea was pretty cool.

Believe it or not, some people think that the room is completely stupid and this guy is off his rocker. No, really?

I’ve gotten responses saying this is a waste of time. This is a waste of money. I don’t really care,” Swick said.

So, really cool or really embarrassing; you be the judge:

We vote embarrassing.

Links:

[10TV.com]: Check Out `Best Damn Room In The Land’

Categories
College Football

Dear PETA, leave our sports alone


Nothing sucks harder and more frequently than PETA. It’s fine when they throw red paint on vapid celebrities and going after people who train dogs for fights, but when they start trying to tell sports teams what to do, that’s when they need to be clubbed like a baby seal. (What’d I say?) Their latest foray into being annoying jackasses is to petition LSU to get rid of its live tiger mascot.


Dear Chancellor O’Keefe:

We are writing to express our sympathy over the death of Louisiana State University’s (LSU) mascot, Mike the tiger, and to urge the school not to replace him. Big cats in captivity are denied everything that is natural and important to them, such as the opportunity to run, climb, hunt, establish their territory, and choose their mates.

Costumed human mascots are currently in use at most universities, and no major professional sports team includes live animals in its mascot program. The versatility of human performers allows them to interact directly with fans and entertain them throughout the game by leading cheers, reacting to the crowd, and pumping up the team. A frightened animal can’t do any of these things.

Meanwhile, the tradition at LSU of having a live tiger goes back 71 years and the tiger gets to live in a 15,000 square foot $3M home with a bathing pool and a waterfall. Man, that sounds terrible. LSU officials have told PETA to go pound sand.

Links:

[ESPN]: LSU likely to ignore PETA, obtain new tiger mascot

Categories
College Football

Odds and Ends: Six Penn State Football players charged with felonies



Anthony Scirrotto leads the charge

Six Nittany Lions football players were formally charged this afternoon for an off-campus brawl that happened only April 1st. All six players were charged with felonies but Anthony Scirrotto and Chris Baker are facing the more serious charges of burglary and simple assault. The other four players (Justin King, Jerome Hayes, Lydell Sargeant, and Tyrell Sales) are charged with criminal trespass, disorderly conduct, and harassment.

You can read the whole police report (pdf)but here’s what basically happened: 1) Scirrotto and his girlfriend were involved in an altercation on the night of March 31. 2) Instead of calling the police, Scirrotto called Sargeant. 3) Sargeant called up some other players and they barged into an off-campus part and two of the players started kicking ass. From the police report, it sounds like a couple of the players were trying to get Scirrotto and Hayes out of the situation but it was way out of control. Still, they are being charged with trespass and disorderly conduct because they shouldn’t have been in a private residence to begin with.

No word from Joe Pa yet on the incident but we get the feeling he’s not going to pull a Bobby Bowden and let these guys off the hook easily, season down the drain or not.

In other news…

Washington Times]: Gilbert Arenas will be the next NBA live cover boy

[700 Level]: Ooooh. Maybe there’s a new Subway Sanwiches curse?

[Professional Cheerleader blog]: Raiderettes lineup announced. We are unimpressed.

[AP]: See? the WNBA is just like the NBA: Deanna Jackson arrested for slugging an opposing player in Jeruselem

And finally, everyone who jumped all over Ron Artest for neglecting his Great Dane owes him an apology. It turns out that he did arrange for the care of “Socks” while he was out of town and that the weight loss was due to a bone infection. Speaking of dogs, this is the saddest story we’ve read all day… remember, all dogs go to heaven.