Posted on Mon Jul 14, 2008 at 12:40:34 PM EST in NFL
More on: Brett Favre, video, fantasy football, Alex Rodriguez, Chauncey Billups, video games, Billy Packer, Ron Artest, WWE, Kobe Bryant, Shaquille O'Neal, Odds and Ends (all tags)

What do Brett Favre and Jon Bon Jovi have in common? Well, they're both buddies with Ron Jaworski and their careers just won't seem to die, but that's not all. Thanks to the guys over at Ryan Parker Songs, we now know that they also have this crappy song in common. The words are included, so sing along. And don't pretend you don't know the rhythm; we saw you at the stadium when the Slipper When Wet Tour rolled through town.

I've been missing playing ball since I called it to an end,
So I went out for some two hand touch with some neighbors and a friend,
As I passed the ball around, it felt so good, I think I found,
That number 4 could still play ball, so I gave the Packers one more call,
And said I've got good news, yeah, I'm coming back,
But they told me I was smoking crack,

They said never, but I'll play forever,
Never say goodbye, never say goodbye,
I'll find somewhere that I can play even if it's not Green Bay,
Say goodbye, never say goodbye,
Now Aaron Rodgers is the guy, but number 4 will never say goodbye,

I'm inspired by what some guys have done like when Jordan played for Washington,
Oh I hope that time's been good to me and I'm more like Foreman than Ali,
No, I've got no secrets unrevealed and I don't need cash like Holyfield,
I just want to find somewhere to throw even if it's for Bon Jovi's Soul,
Cause I've still got skills, I've still got game,
I'm not ready for the hall of fame,

Never, cause I'll play forever,
Never say goodbye, never say goodbye,
I'll find somewhere that I can play even if it's not Green Bay,
Say goodbye, never say goodbye,
Now Aaron Rodgers is the guy, but number 4 will never say goodbye,
I probably made John Madden cry cause number 4 will never say goodbye ...

In other news...

[YardBarker.com]: The question on every fantasy football player's mind

[SoxAddict.org]: The Material Girls goes to Toronto to see A-Rod play

[BleedEaglesGreen.com]: First Elton Brand and now Chauncey Billups, maybe Philly can be the next Boston

[The Angry T]: Rejected EA Sports NCAA 2009 covers

[Intentional Foul.com]: Say hello to our new screen saver

[TheFavreologist]: Finally, someone is capable of explaining "Favre's Role as a Gay Icon" to us

[MiamiHerald.com]: Hit the road, Pack!

[Can't Stop The Bleeding]: Ron Artest does his best "Both teams played hard" routine

[JoeSportsFan.com]: Screw the WWE, here's some classic moments from the WWF

[InventorSpot.com]: The best sports logos EVER!

And finally, Kobe is one sneaky son of a gun.

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Posted on Wed Jul 09, 2008 at 12:51:23 PM EST in MLB
More on: John Sterling, Yankees, NFL, Tom Brady, MMA, babes, Sonics, Michael Vick, Olympics, NBA, Alex Rodriguez, video, Odds and Ends (all tags)

If you think double-dipping is disgusting then what about finger-dipping? You know, when someone sticks their finger in something, sucks it clean and then walks away. Like Puck and the peanut butter back when The Real World was actually worth watching. Well, according to the New York Post, if you happen to work in the same stadium as Yankees radio announcer John Sterling then you might want to get a vomit bucket ready.

"Sterling has made a habit of walking over to the dessert table and dipping his finger into the ice cream barrel," one stadium worker told us, adding that the play-by-play vet has also used the same tablespoon to repeatedly take samples. During the Boston series, "He wandered over to the cake and pie section, broke off a piece of a cake slice, ate it and wiped his grimy hands on the linen tablecloth, leaving the remainder of the slice for someone else to eat - which indeed happened," our spy continued.

Ewwwww. Kid Rock and Tommy Lee won't even touch those sloppy seconds.

In other news...

[BostonSportz.com]: Even NFL coaches think Tom Brady is hot catch

[FightChat.com]: Need inspiration to become a MMA superstar? Well, here's the caliber of chicks you could bang

[NBA.com]: Its official! Suck on that Seattle!

[PerezHilton.com]: For once, we agree with Mr. Rainbow Bright

[BooshMagazine.com]: It's time to play everybody's favorite game: Legal or Olympic Jailbait!

[The Wall Street Journal]: The NBA mines New Delhi for talent

[FightChat.com]: 16 MMA knockouts in the blink of an eye

[Babble.com]: A-Rod loves him some strippers

[NFLJuice.com]: We like big butts and we cannot lie...

[Tirico Suave]: Go, go, Power Plaschke!

And finally, this is why you always, always, always lock up your lightsaber.

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Posted on Thu Jul 03, 2008 at 01:05:24 PM EST in NFL
More on: Brett Favre, Packers, NFL, Alex Rodriguez, Urijah Faber, Wayne Gretzky, Rampage Jackson, Dick Vitale, Erin Andrews, MLB, Len Bias, video, Odds and Ends (all tags)

With rumors ferociously swirling around a potential Brett Favre comeback, everyone is now buzzing about the possibilities. "Are we going to get one more year of horribly timed interceptions?" "Will we get one more season of John Madden slobbering over No. 4?" "Could we still see another euphoric sprint to the end zone?" Who knows. Actually, Tirico Suave knows and they've come up with a pair of headlines from the distant future regarding the NFL's ironman. As indicated, Favre will die at the age of 89, but that still doesn't mean his playing days are over.

In other news...

[NYDailyNews.com]: "Hey, Madonna, whatcha doing tonight?"

[MMAMania.com]: Next up for Urijah Faber is Mike Brown

[The Big Lead]: Thank goodness, she looks nothing like her father

[Throwdown.com]: Rampage is practicing his gangsta rap poses

[Awful Announcing]: Dickie V is just like the rest of us. He's smitten with Erin Andrews too

[The Wizard of Odds]: Art of the cupcake schedule

[Home Run Derby]: Ooh-la-la. Dodgers coconut bra

[ESPN]: Extraordinary piece on the impact of Len Bias' life and death

[The Bad News Bloggers]: Top 10 reasons the NFL salary cap must stay in place

[FBKid's Sports Minute]: It's never too early to start thinking about fantasy football breakout players

[The Sporting Blog]: Weeeeeeeees and pees

And finally, "ringing the bell," huh? So, that's what you kids call it these days.

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Posted on Wed Jul 02, 2008 at 01:27:41 PM EST in MLB
More on: Chris Snyder, ouch, Diamondbacks, Olympics, Manny Pacquiao, Alex Rodriguez, MLB, UFC, video, John Daly, Odds and Ends (all tags)

Other than gasping, dropping to our knees, rolling around on the ground and muttering "uggggh" and "owwww" under our breath, we really don't know what else to say about this.

Catcher Chris Snyder left Monday night's game after getting hit by a foul tip in the groin area. About an hour before Tuesday's game the Diamondbacks put him on the 15-day disabled list with a left testicular fracture.

Snyder will undergo surgery on Wednesday with Melvin hoping his return is relatively soon.

"Hopefully looking at a 15-day period, where he is back after the All-Star break," Melvin said after the D-Backs 8-6 loss to the Brewers on Tuesday night.

Fractured testicle!? We didn't even know it was possible to fracture your nuts. Smash, yes. Crush, yes. Pulverize, yes. But fracture? Ugh, we're starting to get dizzy just talking about it.

In other news...

[The Beardown]: 20 decent reasons to watch the upcoming Olympics

[The Caveman Network]: Manny Pacquiao = Urijah Faber

[HotStoveNewYork.com]: Alex Rodriguez is secretly seeing a dude?!? Nevermind, it's just Madonna

[Lion in Oil]: Best. Ringtone. Ever.

[The Big Picture]: What's your favorite MLB lid?

[All Balls]: Best stars meet sports moments

[MMAChump.com]: Dana White is a big softy

[eBaumsWorld.com]: Cheerleader gets cold cocked by an errant pass

[Home Run Derby]: Mariah Carey, eat your heart out

[PartMule.com]: John Daly played beer, golf teed...huh?

And finally, Scott Van Pelt suddenly sounds like the smoothest voicemail pickup artist ever.

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Posted on Mon Jun 23, 2008 at 10:28:50 AM EST in Other Sports
More on: world's greatest athlete, Alex Rodriguez, Jeremy Wariner, Sidney Crosby, Roger Federer, LaDanian Tomlinson, LeBron James, Roman Sebrie, Floyd Mayweather (all tags)

Arguing over who's better than who in the wide world of sports has been going on for decades. It's a difficult and often sticky situation because trying to compare athletes from different sports is like comparing apples and oranges. ESPN put together one of the most compelling arguments by assembling the SportsCentury: Top 100 Athletes of the 20th Century, but that was just a bunch of people giving their opinions on the matter.

Why can't there be a more scientific approach? Well, now there is; thanks to The Wall Street Journal.

The Journal sought to identify the world's greatest athlete with an approach that, while not completely scientific, took a number of measures into account. A panel of five sports scientists and exercise physiologists was given a list drawn up by the Journal of 79 male athletes. Candidates had to be active in their sport and among the all-time best. (Women will be featured separately in a future article.)

The panel weighed individual performance stats, along with their subjective judgments about the relative difficulty of each sport, to give an overall grade to the athletes. (See "How We Did It" for details.) The judges graded athletes on speed, reflexes, stamina, coordination, as well as power, strength and size. The finalists, they said, exhibited a wide range of athletic skill in highly competitive environments.

There were some surprises. Tiger Woods, a dominant figure in professional sports, didn't crack the Top 10. Panelists said they didn't give golfers much weight when assessing overall athletic ability. Michael Phelps, one of the greatest U.S. swimmers of all time, also missed the top tier because, the judges said, swimmers generally don't perform well out of the water. Such endurance athletes as marathoners and Tour de France cyclists also failed to impress. Too one-dimensional, the panel said.

Based on their findings, here are the Journal's Top 10:

10. Alex Rodriguez, New York Yankees
9. Ronaldo de Assis Moreira, FC Barcelons
8. Jeremy Wariner, 400-meter sprinter
7. Liu Xiang, 110-meter hurdler
6. Sidney Crosby, Pittsburgh Penguins
5. Roger Federer, tennis
4. LaDanian Tomlinson, San Diego Chargers
3. Floyd Mayweather, boxer
2. LeBron James, Cleveland Cavaliers
1. Roman Sebrie, decathlete

You probably haven't ever heard of the guy, but it's hard to argue against someone who can "jump over Shaquille O'Neal," "throw a 16-pound ball the length of a 53-foot yacht" and "leap over a two-lane highway." Oh, and he's run a mile in 4:21.

Links:
[WSJ.com]: The World's Greatest Athlete?
[WaitingForNextYear.com]: LeBron James: World's (Second) Greatest Athlete

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Posted on Wed Mar 26, 2008 at 10:10:38 AM EST in MLB
More on: Jose Canseco, Alex Rodriguez, steroids, wife, book (all tags)

Jose Canseco has a new book coming out which can mean only one thing: more major leaguers are about to get thrown under the bus. First up, Alex Rodriguez.

According to writer Joe Lavin who got his hands on a copy of "Vindicated: Big Names, Big Liars, and The Battle to Save Baseball" prior to it drop date on April 1, Canseco claims to have introduced A-Rod to a steroids distributor. At this point, we're willing to believe just about anybody is or has been juiced, but considering Canseco apparently freely admits to not actually sticking a needle into Rodriguez's ass and pumping him up, we're going to leave it at that. However, we all know A-Rod is true player in every sense of the word, so we don't doubt Canseco's other claims for one second.

He [Lavin] says Canseco claimed he didn't inject Rodriguez but "introduced Alex to a known supplier of steroids." Lavin also says "Canseco claims that A-Rod was trying to sleep with Canseco's wife."

"I really, absolutely, have no reaction," Rodriguez said Tuesday when asked about the claim relating to the steroids distributor. As far as the allegation regarding Canseco's wife, Rodriguez responded:

"I don't know how to answer that.

Well, you could start with either a yes or a no, that's how most people go about answering questions. Of course, you are a modern-day baseball player, so we assume you're just following protocol.

Links:
[NBC Sports]: Report: A-Rod was pursuing Canseco's wife

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Posted on Fri Oct 12, 2007 at 11:39:15 AM EST in MLB
More on: Yankees, Alex Rodriguez, video, funny, David Letterman (all tags)

The Yankees were eliminated from the postseason the other day, but that doesn't mean they aren't still the talk of the town in New York. Joe Torre, Alex Rodriguez, crying journalists; the madness just won't stop. It even permeated into the grand Ed Sullivan Theater on Broadway.

Wow, who would have thought that the pectoral muscles of A-Rod and Biff would be so identical?

Links:
[Our Book of Scrap]: David Letterman Is Still Pretty Damn Funny

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Posted on Mon Jun 04, 2007 at 06:13:20 PM EST in Other Sports
More on: Rap, Tiger Woods, golf, Alex Rodriguez, swingers, Cubs, Penn State, Odds and Ends (all tags)

Just the other day we were sitting around talking about the history of sports but a funny thing happened when our timeline hit the late 60's. Turns out we couldn't remember a damn thing about the world of athletics from 1965-1969. Thank goodness for a couple of Eminem wannabes doing a lame history project and YouTube. And, of course, we gotta give a shout out to the good fellas at You Been Blinded for dropping this knowledge bomb on our noggin. We promise to never forget the late 60's again, but there's no such guarantee for the late 90's. Way too many dollar beer nights!

In other news...

[Golf.com]: Tiger Woods wins this golf tournament too

[SportsbyBrooks]: A-Rod likes to swing and we're not talking bats, folks

[BostonHerald.com]: Soccer fans get crushed in Zambia

[The Golf Blog]: Is Phil really "Just Like Us"?

[YouTube]: Cubs are already self-destructing

And finally, how big of a Penn State football are you? Well if you're gonna be the most diehard Nittany Lions fan on the planet then you gotta get your hands on the PSU motorcycle up for grabs on eBay. And all it'll cost you to have this one of a kind hog is $60,000 if you act fast.

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Posted on Thu May 25, 2006 at 02:32:20 PM EST in MLB
More on: MLB, Alex Rodriguez, Yankees, Red Sox, Manny Ramirez (all tags)

We're as sick of the media East Coast bias and the Yankees-Red Sox rivalry as anyone but you gotta admit that it's pretty funny when two teams start arguing about hitters staring at home run balls too long. After Manny Ramirez admired his homer off Scott Proctor (he did show him up by the way), A-Rod has been accused of doing the same thing to Tim Wakefield.

A-Rod denies that he would ever do something like that.

First of all, I'd never want to embarrass myself, so I wouldn't pretend to embarrass myself by saying I didn't see it if I had. Especially with someone like (Tim) Wakefield on the mound, who I respect as much as any pitcher in the game.

I've hit a lot of homers and I've never pimped one or tried to embarrass myself, my team or a guy like Wakefield or the Red Sox, who I respect so much. I don't celebrate homers, it's not my thing. All you have to do is look at my track record.

Meanwhile, Joe Torre said, "There's a lot of things that go on today that the old-time pitchers wouldn't put up with. The game has changed a lot. It's not only Manny Ramirez." Sounds like Torre wants a beanball at the head of Manny to clear a few things up. We'll root for anything that results in a bench clearing brawl. And, if somehow, AJ Pierzynski could get socked in the jaw in the deal, that'd be even better.

Links:
[NY Daily News]: A-Rod sez charge an injustice

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