Categories
Atlanta Falcons

Michael Vick has murdered a lot more than a city’s Super Bowl dreams


Michael Vick was indicted Tuesday on some pretty nasty charges of competitive dogfighting, procuring and training pit bulls for fighting and conducting the enterprise across state lines. Vick and three of his associates could be facing six years in the slammer and $350,000 in fines if they are found guilty.

As if dog fighting wasn’t already bad enough as a general practice, we learned a little bit more about Vick’s sick rehabilitation plans for the pups at “Bad Newz Kennels.” Turns out that fighting might not even be the worst or most dangerous part for some of these dogs because it is reported that around eight dogs were killed in April in some very inhumane ways, namely by hanging, drowning, electrocuting, shooting or simply “slamming at least one dog’s body to the ground.” Call us crazy, but we don’t think that is the kind of hand’s on relationship the jury is going to want to see out of Vick the kennel owner.

Needless to say, the NFL was not too pleased with the latest development surrounding the man who at one time was considered the future of the league.

We are disappointed that Michael Vick has put himself in a position where a federal grand jury has returned an indictment against him,” NFL spokesman Brian McCarthy said.

“The activities alleged are cruel, degrading and illegal. Michael Vick’s guilt has not yet been proven, and we believe that all concerned should allow the legal process to determine the facts.

Even John Goodwin of the Humane Society was taken back by the horrific methods that Vick used to kill the dogs, saying that “Some of the grisly details in these filings shocked even me, and I’m a person who faces this stuff every day.” Everyone knew that Michael Vick had to be a pretty cold person to involve himself in the blood sport to begin with, but now it’s starting to look like he’s simply a truly psychotic, uncaring murderer. And what do we do with psychotic, uncaring murderers? We ferret leg those bastards and then we throw `em in prison. Duh.

Links:

[BuffaloNews.com]: Vick indicted in dogfight case

Categories
Atlanta Falcons

Bad Moon is now Bankrupt


Andre Rison played football for 11 years in the NFL but somehow still managed to go bankrupt. He owes $58,000 in child support to his ex-wife and another $46,000 in child support two of his baby’s momma so he faces a court-ordered bankruptcy. He probably would have a little more money if all his stuff hadn’t been burned to a crisp by Left Eye.

In 2005, Rison actually spent a month in the DeKalb County Jail in Georgia for failure to pay $127,000 in child support. He paid $10,000 and was released. Now considering that OJ Simpson is still traveling around and playing golf every day after killing two people (do we really need to be bothered with saying stuff like “accused of killing” anymore?), Rison probably still has a boatload of money left that can’t be touched by the courts. And if he doesn’t, then he’s a bigger idiot than we thought.

Here’s a random factoid about Rison: he once told the police his name was Brock Middlebrook after being cited at a bar fight in Kansas City.

Links:
[Sportsline]: No kidding: Rison ordered into bankruptcy to pay child support

Categories
Atlanta Falcons

Michael Vick’s cousin trying his best to take one for the team


Davon Boddie, Michael Vick’s cousin and the man who ran the house where alleged dog-fighting took place, knows exactly where the gravy train is.


I want him (Goodell) to know that everything going on is really my fault. I want to apologize to Atlanta Falcons fans for what’s going on. It’s a lot of drama.

They’re just making Michael look like something he’s not. Michael is the type of dude who would do his sit-ups and crunches every night, read his Bible and go to bed.

Come on Davon, let’s not go overboard here. Vick does sit-ups, crunches, reads the Bible and goes to bed? You’re seriously trying to tell us this is a typical night for Ron Mexico? The only way this could have been a more obvious lie is if he claimed Vick also studied game film of opposing defenses before being tucked in.

Do you think the whole ‘reads his Bible’ thing was written by Vick’s publicist or Boddie’s lawyer?

Links:
[AJC]: Vick’s cousin says it’s “my fault”

Categories
Atlanta Falcons

Michael Vick’s house got jacked up!



Where dogs check in but they don’t
check out!

We all know that Michael Vick is the current king of stupid decisions; from water bottles to dog fights and everything in between, Vick just can’t seem to do the right things. And attorney Gerald Poindexter thinks that it was his virtual retardation that got his crib broken into some time between May 7 and May 18 and not some thug attempting to tamper with evidence from Vick’s dog fighting case.

I don’t think it had anything to do with possible evidence,” in the dog fighting investigation, Poindexter said. “I think it was some feuding over the spoils. Some people believe that in getting ready to sell the house, Vick had promised stuff to some family members and other people felt they deserved things.

Now, we don’t know if this person or persons actually were owed the missing goods but, whoever it was, they certainly made out like a bandit by sneaking in to the house through a back window. The crook(s) obviously had all the time in the world to load up the getaway car U-Haul because they escaped with three plasma televisions (a 32, a 42, and a 62 incher), a pair of floor buffers, an upright washer and dryer, a leather sofa and a wet/dry vacuum. Apparently Vick’s alarm was on the fritz; damn technology. You know, this never would have happened if he had a dog or two on his property at the time.

Links:

[AJC.com]: Mixed feeling about Vick in Va.

Categories
Atlanta Falcons

Michael Vick dog fighting update


Things are not looking up after the memorial day weekend for Michael Vick. ESPN’s Outside the Lines found an informant that basically put Vick as the big whale of dog fighting. Now, we must remind you that informants often lie for their own reasons and that ESPN sucks, but nevertheless, here’s what the source had to say about Michael Vick’s involvement in the dog fighting community:


He’s a pit bull fighter. He’s one of the ones that they call ‘the big boys’: that’s who bets a large dollar. And they have the money to bet large money. As I’m talking about large money — $30,000 to $40,000 — even higher. He’s one of the heavyweights.

The source went on to tell the story of how one of his dogs faced off with one of Vick’s dogs while Vick was in attendance and betting a ton of money on his own dog. Now, as we said earlier, we always question these ‘sit behind a screen with a disguised voice’ types but this guy is completely twisted and might want to out Vick because he thinks it’ll actually help make dog fighting more mainstream.


They shouldn’t be really upset, OK? Because it’s only just an animal. It’s just a dog that is raised up. He’s put out there, you know, and he’s chained up, OK. And the time he gets a certain age, this dog is going to want to fight. It is bred in him, OK? He knows what he is and he’s going to fight. Just take him off the leash, let him go.

Is there anyone with a sense of justice that doesn’t think this guy should be set loose in a cage full of angry dogs? Or perhaps get ferret legged? We’ll keep you updated on this story but it looks more and more like Michael Vick will disgrace himself and the league. The question is, is Vick enough of a star so that the league covers up this scandal?

Oh by the way, ESPN wants to relay their absolute horror regarding dog fighting by posting a video of dog fighting. Of course.

Links:

[ESPN]: Source: Vick ‘one of the heavyweights’ in dog fighting

Categories
Atlanta Falcons

Add canine killer to the list of pseudonyms for Michael Vick



You can blame Michael Vick for this!

The judge is still out on the whole Michael Vick dog fighting case, but one thing we do know is that out of all the dogs seized on Vick’s property, all 65 of them, nearly all will have to be put to sleep. Way to go, Mike!

Almost 100 percent” of animals seized in dog fighting investigations are euthanized because they have a level of aggression that makes them dangerous pets and neighbors, said John Goodwin, a spokesman for the Humane Society of the United States.

Vick can claim whatever he wants at this point, but that’s not going to slow down business at the Chesapeake animal crematorium. Actually, we have no idea where the dogs, mostly pit bulls, are being held at the moment because other sick individuals have been known to steal fighting dogs from shelters for their own personal canine Blood Sport reenactments.

While it sucks to see all these innocent animals get put down because they were just products of a miserable situation, you can’t blame the Humane Society for doing what they gotta do. Would you want those trained killers living next door to you? Goodwin didn’t think so.

It’s simply not fair to someone who has a black lab or a Yorkie to have a fighting dog next door because if that dog gets loose, he’s going to … kill that person’s pet,” Goodwin said, making it clear he was speaking in generic terms only.

The only suitable punishment for Vick at this point is ferret legging the bastard.

Links:

[KSDK.com]: Pit Bulls In Vick Case Likely To Be Euthanized

Categories
Atlanta Falcons

Michael Vick hopes there’s no game tape


Yahoo! Sports seems to be trying to make themselves into an investigative journalism site; remember their pounding the whole Reggie Bush housing scandal into the ground? Well now they’ve set their sights on the Vick dog-fighting case.

In an exclusive, they are reporting that Kathy Strouse, Animal Control coordinator for Chesapeake in Virginia, is claiming that a reliable source informs her that there are tapes out there that tie Michael Vick directly to dog-fighting. Now, we hate Vick as much as the next guy but this evidence seems a little suspicious:


We don’t know where (the tapes) are or if they do indeed exist, but I have been told that they are out there,” said Strouse, who is also affiliated with two other organizations involved in the welfare of animals. “Without knowing where they are, there’s no possibility of getting a search warrant at this point.

So based on this statement which says nothing, Yahoo runs a headline “Videos might show Michael Vick watching dog fights.” Yeah, that’s not irresponsible at all. Oh and there are certain individuals who have identified Vick on the property during matches… but they are reluctant to testify. Well, this certainly seems like a solid case. Great job, Strouse and Yahoo.

Links:
[Yahoo]: Videotapes sought of Vick watching dog fights

Categories
Atlanta Falcons

PETA is retarded


We’re not fans of Michael Vick around here but even we have to call bullshit on PETA’s request for Falcons owner Arthur Blank to suspend Vick pending the investigation of his involvement in a facility that trained pit bulls for dog fights.

Look, we’re not fully convinced that Vick didn’t know what was going on at a property that he claims he simply let a family member use, but we also agree with something called due process. The PETA folks wrote a letter urging Blank to suspend Vick immediately and release him if “animals on his property are found to have been neglected or used for fighting.” Sounds a bit harsh doesn’t it? Even if the animals were trained for fighting (which is utterly despicable), that isn’t a reason to release Vick. Unless he was aware of the activities taking place at that property, he really shouldn’t be held accountable. Sure it’s another black mark on his record but hardly one worthy of release.

By the way, how about Michael Vick using Suzy Kolber as his personal PR whore to tell the fans that he is going to change.


I’m taking it upon myself and giving everybody my word that things are going to get changed around. Things are going to get turned around. I have a game plan for it. … The company I keep, a lot of things (have) got to change, and I mean that from the heart.

Hey, maybe Vick will turn it all around and turn into the player he was hyped to be coming out of college. But we doubt it.

**We would like to apoligize to retarded folks everywhere for comparing them to PETA.

Links:

[Ottawa Sun]: PETA wants Vick sacked

[Lexington Dispatch]: Vick Pleads Ignorance in Dog-Fight Case
[USA Today]: Vick ‘hurting’ inside after talk with Goodell

Categories
Atlanta Falcons

Odds and Ends: Michael Vick loves animals



Vick has a message for dog lovers

Michael Vick’s publicist might just jump off a bridge. The latest incident involves a search of a property in Virginia owned by Vick because authorities believed that dogs were being trained there for illegal fights. Vick doesn’t live at the house but his nephew does.


Early reports indicate as many as 70 dogs on the property, including 60 pit bulls with wounds that appear to be consistent with dog-fighting. Authorities have allegedly uncovered extensive dog-fighting paraphernalia, including rape stands (used to allow fighting dogs to breed while preventing them from attacking each other), equipment used to build strength and endurance in fighting dogs, and controlled substances frequently used in dog-fighting.

Now, we shouldn’t jump to conclusions about the extent that Vick was involved… oh what the hell, let’s just jump to conclusions. How the hell do you now know what your nephew is doing on a property that you own? This is just another example of Vick’s ability to win friends and influence people. Let’s just hope that nobody was pumping the dogs with steroids.

In other news…

[SC]: The Falcons now lead the league in animal cruelty

[Philly.com]: Meet Brian Westbrook’s brother, Byron. No, that’s not confusing at all.

[The Offside]: Croatian Footballer Given a Sheep for Every Goal he Scores. What he does with it is up to him.

[The Big Picture]: What movie sporting event would you have liked to attend in person?

[Our Book of Scrap]: Tony Stewart says NASCAR is fixed

And finally, if you have a lot of time to waste, you can watch cheddar as it ripens. Seriously. Or like us, you can sit around and wonder, “hey whatever happened to Bridget Fonda?” and “why does Nic Cage suck so much?”

Categories
Atlanta Falcons

Michael Vick is a cheap bastard


It’s all over the newsfeeds today: Michael Vick is donating $10k to families of the victims of his alumni, Virginia Tech. If Vick thought this was good publicity, he is wrong. Remember, this is a guy who signed a $130M contract and is the highest paid player in NFL history. And he can only muster up 10k? With wonderful gestures such as the Nationals donning VT caps and Curtis Granderson’s tribute to “his biggest fan”, a VT student killed on Monday, Vick’s piddly donation seems shallow and lacking.

Of course, in moments like this, I always wonder if *I* am the dick, so I got Flash Warner‘s take on this as well:

Sportscolumn: Did you see Michael Vick is donating $10k to assist families of the VT tragedy?
Is it wrong that I think that’s cheap as hell?

The rest of this conversation after the jump.